I eat children

Northbound on the 5 today I passed an older woman driving a somewhat-shabby mini-van. Someone had spraypainted (in green paint) ‘I eat children’ on the left side of her vehicle.

That’s nothing.

I eat heavy metal.

I want to eat a kid someday, perhaps with some garlic and oregano.

This should go in the sequential threads but I just had to put it here.

**The Duggars whelp again

I eat children **

How convenient for you!

At Hallowe’e’n, I put my charming Lhasa on a leash almost long enough to reach the front door. She charges the trick-or-treaters, barking and wagging. When a child flinches, I say, “Oh, don’t mind her, she’s only eaten three children this month!” I discovered that no child has yet mistaken me for Count Olaf, despite the raised eyebrow and evil stare.

fava beans and a nice chianti

Did you see if the minivan turned into the driveway of a ginger bread house?

Did she offer any recipes? I’m looking for a good new marinade for the summer barbecue.

Pointless addition -

Medieval surname: pronounced ‘at Chill-thern’

ate Children

Chilthern apparently being a type of soil good for farming.

(My other favorite medieval surname is: ‘in the Ditch’, meaning living in a low area.)

I wonder if the van lady is a grumpy lunch lady or a grumpy neighbor. Assuming she didn’t apply the spray-paint herself.