Admittedly it’s hard to think of situation that wouldn’t be helped by “Monster Cocks!”, “Banged Trannys!” and “Sweet babe with a dildo”, but this one may be of more practical assistance.
http://www.cccsintl.org/
[Fixed link. Please note: if someone accidentally posts a porn link, the preferred response is to click on the “Report this post to a Mod” button. And if you must quote the offending post to note that it’s a porn link, please don’t include the link again in the quote, as that makes one more post the Mods have to edit. Thanks! - JMCJ]
You mentioned that you got a tax return that was already spent on bills. If the tax return was very large you might think about having less tax taken out of your husband’s paycheck. You don’t want to go so low that you owe a lot next year but if it means two or three hundred dollars more every month that you get to keep it can make a huge difference.
Thing is, though, that tax return was with deductions for their mortgage interests and credits for their kids, and it was apparently still not very much. That makes me really pessimistic about the odds of them getting a significant amount of money every month by redoing the withholdings.
I hate to bring this up, but a friend of my mom’s was in a similar sort of financial situation while she was married–tons of debt, unable to keep up with all the payments, made too much for government assistance. Then her husband left her, and since he was no longer living in the house she was eligible for some assistance. When their divorce was final, she was eligible for more benefits for herself and her daughter. You might be better off financially to just go on and leave you would be to stay and try to build up a safety net for you and the kids.
Did you try putting in an application at a temp. agency? Most of them will have jobs that don’t need any special skills like taking inventory, filing, etc… They have all different shifts and if you have to work around your husband’s changing schedule you don’t have to commit to a certain time every day. It also saves the gas of looking for a job because you only go there once and after that they call you when they have a job. But don’t wait for them to call you. I worked at a temp office and most of the jobs were given out to people who called right away in the morning to ask if there was jobs.
Another place to find temp work is through the school district. Call all of the schools and find out how they get substitute lunchroom workers, janitors or teacher’s aides. The pay is usually decent and you don’t need any dressy clothes.
I’d go with Nametag’s option 1. I did something similar, small scale, for my sister once. When I’m unhappy, I sometimes get myself into trouble. Bad habit, but I’m onto it and I think over it - but I do realise that I’ve been lucky to get away with it a few times.
Anyway, over here we have a very good option 1, and if Nametag’s right and it’s good there too, then that definitely sounds like something I would go for in your case.
there is an excellant book called Financial Peace by Dave Ramsey. You can probably find it at your local library. He also has a radio program that is excellet. If nothing else you will hear about people who are in as bad a situation as you are. If you have the opportunity to call, he seems really helpful in helping to figure out where to go and what to do next. He is based in Nashville TN so if you are anywhere near there you might make an appointment. Basically he says to protect the basics first, Housing, utilities etc. make minimum paymetns on everything til you have $1000.00 in savings for an emergentcy fund. Sell everything you don’t absolutely need, have a yard sale and sell so much the kids think they are next. Your husband needs to get a second job doing something, if he can’t get one at a retail store or something like that becuase he might get called to work, he can hire out as a temporary, there are temps for more than secretatrial work. He can also mow lawns, shovel snow, paint garages, you can clean houses, offer to babysit for your friends, sew for hire, there are ways of making money if you look for them. Any way, once you have the emergncy fund in place you make a list of all your debts smallest to largest. Make minimum payments on everything except the smallest and put anything extra on that debt, til you have it paid off then use that money to attack the next debt. Til you are debt free. It ain;t easy, you have to both be on the same page and attack this thing like it is a threat to your children.
You didn’t get here overnight and you won’t get out overnight but you can make it out of debt if you really want it.
I second whoever suggested Dave Ramsey. He’s not one of those hoity toity financial advisors who’s always had money; he was bankrupt at one point.
You have got to stop beating yourself up. SHIT HAPPENS. Sometimes the shit that happens isn’t anybody’s fault, it just happens. It’s not like you’ve gone out and charged up 15 credit cards. Most Americans are one disaster away from where you are.
Bankruptcy, as reluctant as I am to mention it, might be an option. Yes, it’s bad, but let’s face it, your credit is ruined already. Even if you paid everyone off tomorrow, it’s not like the credit rating people are going to go “oh wow, they’re great, let’s bump up their credit rating back to 700.” It’s gonna be shot for years.
Nobody blinks an eye and starts spouting off about obligations when a CEO files for bankruptcy. The CEO is just doing what they’ve gotta do to keep the company afloat and take care of the stockholders, right?
I’m more concerned about your family as this point; I’m not worried about your creditors. A lot of people would be financially better off if they filed, had some of their debts discharged and just started over. Keeping a roof over your kid’s heads is more important than the credit card company.
(Correct me if I’m wrong, but doesn’t a business get some kind of tax break for the debt they eat?)
I’m not saying you should file for bankruptcy or that you’d even be better off. Some people wouldn’t be, some would. If you would be better off, maybe that’s an option. Bankruptcy laws are there to help people like you who get in over their heads. You’ve gotta do what’s best for you and the family.
IANAL or a Financial Advisor but here are 4 things I think you could do immediately:
Forget about the credit card for now. Right now your priority is the house, food, the utilities and the car you’re going to keep.
Ditch the dead car. LET them repo it if they want to. CALL them and tell them to repo it. As stated earlier, your credit’s already ruined. Getting rid of that 2nd car payment and insurance will take a load off.
Get bitchy with the creditors. Stop answering the phone, for one thing. If you do happen to pick up and they start in on you, tell them that they can either accept what you’re already giving them or you can file for bankruptcy. The person on the other end of the line is a person so don’t get abusive, but bear in mind they are paid to make your life hell.
Try CCCS as others have suggested. They can get your creditors to chill out and all you’d have to do is pay them once a month and they’d deal with the rest.
Ok, what sort of car is it? It could be a $5 part that cripples it - there are many of these silly time bombs in cars. In addition, you could write the car manufacturer and tell them that they have made a car that is so unreliable and uneconomic to fix that it has caused you significant hardship - if it’s new enough to make payments on, it’s new enough for a sympathetic manufacturer to grant factory approval to fix at no cost to the owner. Car companies aren’t stupid - if you’re really hard up and they help you out for (their) ten cents on what would have been a (your) dollar repair, you’ll likely reward them with some loyalty.
Have you applied at gasoline stations? Most stations are so short for people that they’re living in fear of the state inspector showing up to find that their guy has worked for 24 hours straight and doesn’t give a damn about who he sells cigarettes to.