I guess I still have it

[pulykamell]

@MeanOldLady

What about honkey? Is it as humorous as cracker? Because every time I hear honkey, I crack up like a little kid laughing because someone said boobies.

I’m not sure if I’ve ever heard that word used unironically. All I could think of when I hear that word is the SNL Richard Pryor “Dead Honky” skit. To my ears, it’s even more ridiculous than “cracker.” At least “cracker” has some a little “bite” to it as a string of sounds. “Honkey” just sounds goofy.

[SecretaryofEvil]

@VinylTurnip

There was me, that is Blackie, and my two droogs, that is Whiteboy and Cracker, and we sat in the Atlanta Shakebar trying to make up our rassoodocks what to do with the evening. The Atlanta Shakebar sold shakes-plus… shakes plus chocolate or vanilla or banana, which is what we were drinking. This would loosen you up and make you ready for a bit of the old ultra-annoyance.

@Nzinga_Seated

Dead. I am crying. Laughing. Ultra annoyance. I’m done. I just can’t.

@Tamerlane

Awesome. I don’t lol much, but that one did the trick.

Yes, that was quite good.

[Drunky_Smurf]

@MeanOldLady

What about honkey? Is it as humorous as cracker? Because every time I hear honkey, I crack up like a little kid laughing because someone said boobies.

True story.
The first time I ever heard honkey was when my 7th grade history teacher said, “How would you like it if I called you honkey?”* I laughed because I had never heard it and thought maybe she was just making stuff up. Besides, honkey, it just sounds funny. She got mad that I laughed and I had to go to the office. I was laughing the whole way thinking, “What the hell is going on? Huh huh ‘Honkey’.”

For the next week or so my best friend and I went around laughing saying we were honkeys because we honk. Honk! Honk!

@SecretaryofEvil

I’m a relatively young man, but in my short experience on this planet I’ve learned that unsolicited tales of fist fights or casual sex tend to be exaggerated.

Another true story.
This one time I was banging like twelve chicks at once and got a phone call…
*She said that in response to me responding to someone else who asked me where Lebanon was and I said, “It’s over there by the other arab countries.” Except I said the first “a” with an “a” sound like in straight.

[Jackmannii]

@diggerwam

See, I think that the punishment should fit the crime. I just think a felony on a 20 year old that could possibly affect the rest of his life is too big a punishment for tossing a drink at someone.

The odds of anyone in that group getting convicted of a felony are somewhere beneath infinitesimal. It wouldn’t surprise me if their parents could afford the sort of high-priced legal talent that could make the whole thing go away.

Anyway, I enjoyed hearing the outcome of this confrontation. The OP and his family are fortunate it didn’t have nastier repercussions.

[Count_Blucher]

ok. Bad situation, it got handled. Glad nobody got seriously hurt. That said:

@QuickSilver

If they could be arsed to stop shoveling food in their maw long enough to stand around and record it, they could have lent a hand.

Nobody appreciates good dinner theater anymore. That and recording it is tacky. I mean, how are they going to get people to come to the Wednesday night show if boot-leg DVDs are being sold for a buck by the guy with the card table in the park?

“This is the part where they throw the drink. Honey, did you bring the newspaper & the squirt-guns?”
“I thought* you *brought them…”

[RedFury]

@MLS

Another option would have been to ask the restaurant authorities to get the kids to behave. I’ve been in a situation where one person was being obnoxious and a manager told him to either clean up his act or leave. No confrontation between the offender and the offended.

But see? That would have been erm…too civilized and done nothing to prove to Ducati that he “still has it.” :rolleyes:

[panaccione]

I think it’s reasonable to see both sides here. The kids were obnoxious to start with, and then Ducati was obnoxious with his response, “you’re done, now.” Like he’s their dad or something.

Then the kids stepped it up a notch and so did Ducati. Unfortunately, the kids will likely be the only ones to suffer long term consequences from this.

Ducati, in a more perfect world, you would be facing charges because of this. You basically called them out when a simple “come on guys” would have been sufficient. Then, you beat up a kid. Sorry, but you don’t still got it and you likely never did.

[lorene]

@MeanOldLady

This isn’t to say you should just walk up to Bob in accounting and go, “Good morning, nigger.” Unwise.

Welp, looks like I’ve got some apologizing to do tomorrow.

[Nzinga_Seated]

@Rick

Do you sleep with a loaded Big Gulp? I would if I lived in your neighborhood.

This thread just keeps delivering for me.

@MeanOldLady

“Good morning, nigger.”

My new sig line!

@MeanOldLady

What about honkey? Is it as humorous as cracker? Because every time I hear honkey, I crack up like a little kid laughing because someone said boobies.

Honkey is my secret favorite. We all used to say cracka all the time, but I always liked honkey because it sounded so seventies! It’s like the slur ‘jive turkey’.

@lorene

Welp, looks like I’ve got some apologizing to do tomorrow.

That’s it folks. I’m done with this thread. I am all laughed out.

[Spud]

I prefer “Jive Ass Honkey”…
and you need to wear a purple hat when saying it.

[Ibanez]

ducati
Rough crowd huh ?
Not to worry, I’d rather be stuck with you in the rough part of town at 3 in the morning when the car breaks down, and I’m almost certain most of your critics would feel the same if it came down to it.

[MeanOldLady]

@Spud

I prefer “Jive Ass Honkey”…
and you need to wear a purple hat when saying it.

I own this coaster. Just sayin.

[Bullitt]

jive turkey

[Chimera]

@panaccione

Ducati, in a more perfect world, you would be facing charges because of this. You basically called them out when a simple “come on guys” would have been sufficient. Then, you beat up a kid. Sorry, but you don’t still got it and you likely never did.

Or your reading of events could be complete bullshit.

[Battle_Pope]

Ducati Sobchak: OVER THE LINE!

Sk8terboi: Huh?

Ducati Sobchak: I’m sorry, Sk8terboi. You were over the line, that’s a foul.

Sk8terboi: Bullshit. Mark it 8, Dope.

Ducati Sobchak: Uh, excuse me. Mark it zero. Next frame.

**Sk8terboi: **Bullshit, Walter. Mark it 8, Dope.

Ducati Sobchak: Sk8terboi, this is not 'Nam. This is dining. There are rules.

The Dope: Ducati, ya know, it’s Sk8terboi, so his language slipped over the line a little, big deal. It’s just a meal, man.

Ducati Sobchak: Dope, this is a family diner, this determines who enters the next dining booth. Am I wrong? Am I wrong?

Sk8terboi: Yeah, but I wasn’t over. Gimme the marker Dope, I’m marking it 8

**Ducati Sobchak: **[pulls out a gun] Sk8terboi, my friend, you are entering a world of pain.

The Dope: Ducati…

**Ducati Sobchak: **You mark that frame an 8, and you’re entering a world of pain.

Sk8terboi: I’m not…

Ducati Sobchak: A world of pain.

Sk8terboi: Dope, he’s your partner…

**Ducati Sobchak: **[shouting] Has the whole world gone crazy? Am I the only one around here who gives a shit about the rules? Mark it zero!

**The Dope: **They’re calling the mods, put the piece away.

**Ducati Sobchak: **Mark it zero!

The Dope: Ducati…

Ducati Sobchak: You think I’m fucking around here? Mark it zero!

**Sk8terboi: **All right, it’s fucking zero. Are you happy, you crazy fuck?

Ducati Sobchak: …It’s a family diner, Sk8terboi.

…annnnnnnnnnd scene!

[China_Guy]

Honkey and cracker have no, and I mean zero, connotation of being an insult. When it was "Honky Muthafucka, yes, we knew that was probably intended as an insult.

It’s kinda died out of vogue, but Honky was pretty widely used in the 1990’s in Asia. It meant people from Hong Kong. And no I’m not making that up. Newspaper headlines like “Honky Decapitated in Borneo” for someone on a tour group that had an unfortunate taxi accident.

[Nzinga_Seated]

@MeanOldLady

I own this coaster. Just sayin.

It’s…it’s beautiful.

[Zebra]

@Nzinga_Seated

Yeah, I don’t think he would have spilled that drink if he knew he was getting a felony…he would have thought twice! A felony will mess you UP, man. Sooo many doors will slam closed.

ETA: That kid calling you a cracker when all his friends are white is weird. It would be like the one white friend calling a black man a coon while all his black friends just sat there. You would think at least one of them would have been like, “Dude, what the hell?..”

I’m not really offended by Cracker. I know I’m supposed to be but sorry, it doesn’t hit me at all.
Reading the OP with the tattoos and such I knew these were not younger teens. If you’re 22 and still acting 14 you’re life is pretty fucked up to begin with so getting arrested was something that was pretty bound to happen sooner or later. It’s probably it’s over spilling a drink and threatening to knife someone rather than actually knifing someone or robbing a liquor store.

[Nzinga_Seated]

Would people stop going on and on about how cracker has “no, and I mean zero,” connotation of being an insult? We get it! No word we have can flay you open and lay in the ground writhing in agony like the great WORD OF THE N VARIETY because, you know, slavery and stuff. Dudes, we believe you! The point of the story was that it would be weird. Weird, dude. Like if your family were red heads and I was the only blonde and I said to this other random tough guy red head, “Freakin’ ginger”. It would be weird to me that the other kids wouldn’t be like, “WTF”? No one is saying that cracker or honky or blue eyed devil will hurt your feelings. You guys are forcing my hand into admitting my true thoughts on the subject… THE WHOLE STORY SOUNDS SKETCHY AS HELL. There. I said it man. I know I wasn’t the only one freakin’ thinking it.

[Zebra]

@madsircool

The child? The effing child???

Was Alex from A Clockwork Orange ‘a child’?

I wish some of you would stop identifying with the criminal and try to understand how stressful and destructive this is for regular law-abiding peeps.

Alex was a child. He was 15 years old by the time he got to prison.