Nope. Only an idiot or a sociopath mistakes compassion for weakness.
Don’t feel like a chump. You made a mistake. The minute you found out she was using you should have told her to get out. No if ands or buts.
When are people going to understand that helping an addicted person who is using does more harm that good.
I know your intentions were good. But you became her enabler. You should be glad it was only for two days. Many people do it for a lifetime.
Enabler -
One that enables another to achieve an end; especially : one who enables another to persist in self-destructive behavior (as substance abuse) by providing excuses or by making it possible to avoid the consequences of such behavior.
No one should help and addict if they’re using. You post is a good example why.
So, how went the ride to the train station?
Its admirable that you are trying to help her despite your reservations, but as other have intimated, you cannot let her take over your life, steal your shit, live there indefinitely, etc.
I have a cousin who is a crack addict and is a decorated Army veteran with ribbons for his service in Bosnia, Iraq, etc. He has a spinal injury from a HMMV wreck in Iraq and has a case of full-blown PTSD along with it.
I love him and I respect what he’s done but not what he’s become. I wouldn’t let him stay at my house when he asked.
He’s getting clean now at yet another VA hospital, God willing.
The ride to the train station went well. We barely made it in time and it was kind of a panicked rush to find out how to check her bags and find the gate. We got to the baggage desk three minutes too late to have her bags go on her same train. At first I though the woman was saying that my friend couldn’t board the train and I was just thinking that absolutely no fucking way am I bringing her home and doing this again next week. Did I mention this train only goes to her hometown once each week?
I don’t feel like I enabled her at all in her drug use because I was helping her get away from her situation here. She hasn’t lived in her hometown for over 25 years so it will probably be easier for her to stay away from drugs without all her friends from here. On the drive she told me that she had been straight for 10 years before this relapse. I don’t know if she was totally straight for that time but that’s about how long she hasn’t been in legal trouble.
Nothing was stolen and I haven’t seen anyone suspicious driving around on my street. The day before she left she told one person that she was already in Chicago so that probably diffused some unpleasantness that could have happened.
I would do it over but I won’t do it again.
I don’t know many (any?) drug addicts, but if they’re anything like alcoholics, then I understand why you hate them. Alcoholics are selfish and undependable, liars and sneaks. I hate alcoholics.
But, I am glad that you helped her, and that it went well. You may have been her only hope of escaping there and getting to a better place. Good for you.