I’m sorry. While I’m not quite hating Christmas this year, I would certainly like to see it postponed or cancelled. Money is so tight and my dad is in the hospital. He’s intubated and only occasionally responsive. I just can’t get into the mood.
Since September shit has been one thing after another.
I broke up with my BF of three years because he is a compulsive liar. It was worth it but I was stuck with a lot of bills I don’t have the money for.
Then in November my ex husband died. He was the father of my two children. He literally drank himself to death. Dead at 49. Thanksgiving was rough for the kids and Christmas is just going to be worse.
Then last week I found out my son was taken for $1000 by some girl he met. He was naive and learned a hard and expensive lesson. He now has no money to buy presents. His bank account is almost $900 in the hole.
Only one week until Christmas and I have only bought one gift.
I don’t even feel like getting out any decorations and there will be no tree. I wish we could just skip it this year.
I was in the exact same situation about 2 or 3 years ago. My parents had been together for about 33 years. It made me hate Christmas (and any other holiday) with a passion. I can’t say that I truly enjoy them now, but it does seem to get easier every year. Hang in there…
PM me if you’d like to chat. Believe me, I understand where you’re coming from completely.
This year’s not going to be at all good. On the face of it I have plenty of money in the bank, but in reality, it’s only several months’ living money, thanks to the mortgage, council tax, car taxes, etc.
I was in almost the exact same position, six years ago. My parents (together nearly 25 years at that time) split up between Thanksgiving and Christmas, there was tons of drama, my youngest sister was still living at home so got caught up in the worst of it. Also, I was really sick, and I moved to another state at the beginning of January. It was pretty much the worst Christmas ever.
This year is going to suck, I won’t lie. But it will get better. I’m sorry you and so many people are having such a difficult time. Don’t feel like you have to fake it, seriously. Just accept that this year is going to be different than all the Christmases you remember, and take it for what it is. And maybe do something different next year. ((Merry Magdalen))
My uncle died this summer. He was in his 80s, and had been in declining health, so his death was not unexpected. My husband and I sent my aunt a wreath for Christmas; we thought it would be a nice, appropriate gesture. Not overly festive but still a sentiment of the season.
So she sends a note thanking us for the nice wreath for my uncle’s grave. Apparently she put it, red ribbon and all, on the tombstone. How sad is this? It was for her door!
The holidays suck when you are grieving. I laid out some decorations today but all I thought about the whole time was when my kids were babies and me and their dad were young and in love. We bought our first tree …uggg
I just am trying my best to make the house look like Christmas.
It does not feel that way though, but it is looking like it.
I sit here crying over a man I have not loved in many years. His death was sudden and I cry more for our kids than him, at least I tell myself that.
Sometimes I am so busy dealing with work and life I forget to think and then it hits me and I cry like a baby.
We’re OK this year, but one year around Christmas our Best Beloved dog died, with some unexpected ugliness that followed, we both got ragingly sick, and we still had to host a big NYE party we’d been planning for months. Just couldn’t get into it at all. It was really rotten.
My way for coping with times like that is to tell myself, “Self, I’m just going to feel like this until I don’t feel like this anymore*.” Sometimes it’s good just to let yourself feel crappy. Get it over with. Realize that this too shall pass, but don’t force it. And when things get better, realize also that this too shall pass, and remember to be consciously and sincerely grateful for good times, which can be oh so fleeting.
It can also help to try to do something nice for someone else, even if it’s as simple as complimenting the grocery cashier on her earrings or holding a door for someone. Karma works.
I wish all of you peace, and hope for the new year.
I spent $300 earlier this month for a root canal. On Saturday I have to go back for a filling on the same tooth. That money could have gone for presents. Because it didn’t, I am giving sucky, half-assed gifts this year. I couldn’t even buy the Nintendo DS I was going to get my daughter. And I still need more dental work, including another root canal, which will have to wait till after New Year’s when my dental insurance kicks in. And then there’s my ex, who will be spending Christmas with his new partner while I have no guy to get gifts for or kiss under the mistletoe. At least I still have a job, and a little money for gifts. And no one in my family died or became seriously ill, unlike 4 years ago when my ex and I spent Christmas day in the waiting room of the hospital where he was born while his extended family took turns visiting his grandma, who had had a heart attack a few hours earlier. And this past week, my co-workers and I adopted a family that is currently receiving public assistance and chipped in to buy them a food basket and gifts for their little girl. You should have seen her eyes light up when she opened her brand new winter jacket and video game. I am trying to focus on positive things, and realize that things could be worse.