I Hate It Here (now with flowers)

It’s a little late to complain, but Ladybird’s funeral reminded me of how pissed off I am about this. Oklahoma, like many states, plants native wildflowers on the Interstate highway medians and embankments. This is fine and good, and the only nice looking thing (including the people) in this worthless festering hole the y call a state. It might be the only good thing the DOT has ever done with the taxpayers’ money. There have been an exceptional number of flowers this year because of the rain. About a month ago, the mowers came out and cut most of them down. The plants were shin-high at most, so they certainly didn’t block lines of sight, and they were in the middle of flowering, so there is now no way for them to reseed. To make matters more ludicrous, they mowed the 2 inch tall stubble again about 2 weeks ago, during a break in the rain. Now I get to look at muddy ruts every evening. I’m glad I drive to work in the dark. What the fuck is the rush? Did they need make-work for the brain dead rednecks who drive the tractor? God forbid they patch a fucking pothole or something. Were they afraid one of the evildoers or gasp a mexican guy was going to evade the world’s shortest cop by digging a shallow trench amongst the blooms and lying down in it? Is there some legitimate reason I’m overlooking? Hey, assholes! Get it into your good old boy skulls that you don’t have to mow EVERY SQUARE INCH OF THE ENTIRE FUCKING STATE! I know mowing is the state sport but could you confine it to your 50 fucking acres of red dirt with a singlewide in the middle of it? And while I’m at it: I am tired of hearing about your plans for that shitty plot of land. You are never going to build your fucking “dream house” on it, you delusional fucks.

Rednecks and Mexicans?

I wasn’t too clear there, I suppose. The rednecks who populate this state are mortally terrified of “mexicans” (note small M) who are often neither from Mexico nor illegal and are no more threatening than the average Oklahoman. It would be funny if I wasn’t surrounded by them (the rednecks that is).

It’s been many years since I drove from Ft. Smith to Tahlequah, but I found it a pleasant looking state.
Shame about the flowers. Mostly red clover here on the freeways.

Why don’t you get the fuck out then?

No you!

Hold on a minute. They used taxpayer money to plant flowers, and then used taxpayer money to mow them?

Sure.

Most years those wildflowers look great in the spring, but by July the grass has long since turned brown. I’d imagine that there’s a schedule for the DOT to keep to make sure that the long brown dry grass doesn’t become a wildfire danger. This year, however, has been unusually wet for Oklahoma, but that doesn’t stop bureaucrats from keeping to their schedule.

Ah. Still stupid, but nearly so stupid as I originally thought. It had slipped mi mind that plants have seasons. I’ll try to remember that next winter, when I’m confused as to why the trees look so naked.

OK is only pretty near the borders. (not all of them) It’s a trick.

City/transportation departments are the same all over. Calgary is a semi-arid area, and water can be precious here, but that doesn’t stop the City from having its sprinklers going full-blast in the middle of a solid rain shower, after three weeks of solid rain-showers. Or from planting grass instead of native plants that couldn’t care less about getting additional water. Or from ripping out a sidewalk or road in preparation for re-surfacing, and not getting the crew in to finish the job for months after it was ripped out.

So what about the single lane wooden bridge over the river with the little old lady in the red pickup on the other side?
She floored it and I didn’t argue with her.

I thought at the one lane bridge my red barchetta left the giants stranded on the other side.