I was born on Christmas Eve. My parents joked about how I was the “greatest Christmas present EVER”. They’ve got pictures of me as a newborn in a Santa cap. Even my name is a joke about the day on which I was born. While all of this, especially the name thing, would break an ordinary man, none of that bothers me.
What bothers me is that every year somebody (and it’s never the same person) gives me shit about how they have to buy me both a Christmas and a birthday present. Every year someone complains about what a financial burden it is for them, seeing as how they have to buy presents for everyone, but they have to buy me two. You don’t have to get me anything/ Fuck you and your “financial burden”. If it’s such a problem, don’t buy me anything at all. I don’t need your presents. If they’re given out of obligation, I don’t want them. And if you’re only giving me one because you want one on your birthday, then double fuck you.
I can never celebrate my birthday on the day of my birth. On Christmas Eve, people are busy. They’re either running around trying to finish buying presents or they’re running around trying to squeeze in a visit with all the relatives they can. I can’t fault them for that. It just kind of sucks that I’ve never gotten a party*. But if anyone decides that they feel obligated to throw me one out of pity, then please see the last few sentences of the last paragraph.
Besides, I’ve decided that I’m not going to age anymore. This year’s will be the last birthday I ever celebrate. So everyone, raise your glasses. I’m proposing a toast to myself. Here’s to being 26 forever. tink
Fuck birthdays. Fuck them long and hard in the ass with a plunger without lube and without a reach around.
*-I actually got a birthday cake this year, complete with trick candles. I wasn’t expecting it, and was a very nice surprise.
My birthday is Christmas Day. And so is my sister’s. My newborn pictures have me in a Christmas stocking. My parents’ joke was that their best birthday/Christmas gift to me was a baby sister. I almost got stuck being named either Holly or Noelle (thank god that didn’t happen!). The only birthday party I’ve ever had took place in October. And I never never get a chocolate birthday cake, because my sister hates chocolate*.
My sisters all went in together and got me The Complete Far Side 2-volume set for my birthday this year.
*This year, she’s spending Christmas Day with her boyfriend’s family, so I’ve been promised a chocolate cake. crosses fingers and hopes
One year, when money was especially tight, my mother gave him a slipper for his birthday, the next day she gave him the matching slipper for Christmas.
"Those of us with December birthdays know what the three wise men said to Jesus: ‘Now, these are both for your birthday and Christmas.’ " - Bob Smith
Whaffuck? Don’t they have to buy birthday and Christmas presents for everyone else, too, just at different times?
Anyway, if you decide to forgo eternal youth in favour of cake, you might do like the Queen and put your birthday off a few months to a more appropriate time. You could call it “Lord Ashtar’s birthday observed.”
My niece was born around Christmas, too (she’s 7 this year.) My wife and daughter and I have always made a big deal of her birthday as an individual event, making sure she has a “Christmas-free” birthday party, with friends and gifts wrapped in non-holiday paper, and chocolate cake and all. We drive three hours to her house to make sure she has a Birthday Party every year.
My birthday is in July, so I don’t have any personal experience with your gripe, Lord Ashtar, but when I was a kid I had friends with late December birthdays who never in their lives had a birthday party that wasn’t part of a Christmas celebration.
Her mom is the only other one in the family that understands.
My stepdad’s birthday is near enough to Christmas that he finds it annoying. We celebrate it in July instead, and it’s his “birthday and a half”. Problem solved!
Personally, I find it so insulting that people think that they can get away with giving a child a gift that is supposed to count for their birthday and Christmas*. Then
they watch their friends and siblings get showered with twice as many gifts every year just because they happened to be born in May or August. A child doesn’t choose when they’re born.
I know it sounds crass to put so much emphasis on gifts and the amount thereof, but think of how it looks to an eight year old.
A solution for gift-givers who feel the crunch around the holidays, is instead of buying two material gifts, give one gift and in the card, promise the child something like a trip to a movie that hasn’t come out yet, or the zoo, or something they won’t be able to enjoy until the weather is nicer. My cousin was born Christmas Eve and he used to get so excited at the prospect when my mom or my aunt promised him; “As soon as the snow melts, we’ll go to the toy store and you can choose a new kite/soccer ball/some accessories for your bike.”
*[sub]Trips to Disneyworld, Pit tickets to Madonna concerts and racing bikes don’t count, btw. Those are each worth four presents.[/sub]
New Year’s Day birthday here. Which sucks royally. But I have to admit - Christmas Day and Christmas Eve are probably WAY worse.
In fact, I’d go out on a limb, and say that Christmas Eve may be the absolute worst birthday there is. Everyone’s too busy to celebrate. At least on Christmas Day, most people are in the mood to kick back and party some.
My birthday’s on the day after Christmas, it’s never bothered me a bit. Mom used to ask me to change it and celebrate it in June, but I like it just the way it is.
I’ve never had a party, nor an individual birthday cake, and that’s okay with me. (On the bad side, though, since I learned not to pay much attention to birthdays, I often forget that those of my husband and kids are coming up till they’re almost upon me.)
I figure the best birthday present I ever got was not being named Merry Carol, as my mother wanted.
Mine is the 21st so I feel your pain. I could care less about the presents now that I’m an adult but I definitely missed the whole “special day” feeling. I don’t feel like it’s important enough to reschedule it to a fake day so I just grin and bear it when I get xmas cards with “and Happy Birthday!” penciled in underneath.
My Birthday is on August 27th. Yes that is not as bad as on the 24th of December but I had my own problems. School always started on the 28th at my high school, and as a result they never announced my birthday over the intercom…
Well, my birthday’s a few weeks after Christmas, and so I end up getting, well, not the “double duty” gifts, but rather the nothing stuff because people spent their money on Christmas. I’ve encouraged after-Christmas sales for years too. Maybe I’ll just make this birthday my last also – will 25 forever work?
PS: Happy belatedbirthdayandMerryChristmas, Lord Ashtar!
I hear ya; one of my best longtime friends has two sons born in December; one on the 18th and the other the 11th (just born this year!). I try to make sure that the gift I get the elder is very birthday-ish and celebrated separately. Sometimes I link it to his Christmas gift, but never make one reliant on the other, like giving him batteries for his birthday and a radio for Christmas! I feel really bad for him now, as he’ll have to share everything in his life with his little brother; room, parents, toys, AND birthday. His grandparents all live out of state, so you know they’ll only come in once and call it done.
Happy belated Birthday, Lord Ashtar, and 26 is a perfect age to stay! Sure wish I could have.
Mine’s not nearly as bad, but I was born on April 2nd. So, all the way through school, I could never tell anyone, on April First, that my birthday was tomorrow, no one ever believed me.
“Oh yeaaah SUUUUURE your birthday’s tomorrow, oh yeah April Fools huh?”.
And yeah, screw people who look at buying presents as an obligation, or insurance that THEY’ll get presents. Jeez.
My birthday is New Year’s Eve. No one comes to my parties. Last year I got a Christmas/birthday card. Sigh. And I get all the regifted/rejected xmas presents…sometimes with the same gift bag from xmas. Sigh.
And I’m turning 30 this year. Anyone want to send me a birthday card? That’d be cool…
