I got home a little while ago. I was at the funeral home. I lost my second uncle Wensday morning. This is too much for me. Two Uncles dying of cancer in a little less than two months is too much.
This one was my Uncle Dale. He became my hero on New Years Eve when I was ten years old. My dad had been drinking as usual, and was about to beat me for the second time that night. My Uncle Dale was suddenly beside us and made him let go of me. That was the first time anyone had ever been able to stop him without them being beaten too.
Uncle Dale was not a rich or famous man, but he played music with some famous peoples bands in his day. Charlie Pride, Loretta Lynn, Whispering Bill Anderson. He even had a show on a local channel here when I was a kid. To me he was the best there was.
He owned a bar the whole time I was growing up and played there every weekend.
At the funeral home tonight I saw two of his ex wives (numbers 1 & 3 I think) and all nine of his living children there, talking about old times and comforting one another, with no resentment at all.
No he wasn’t rich , famous or important to anyone but us. We will all miss him.
You will here this a lot. We are sorry for your loss. From what you said he sounds like a good man and the would is greater for his life and less for his death.
Remember
It is not what you lost from his death, but what you learned from his life. He will always be with you.
Revedge, WeirdDave and etgaw1, Thank you all very much for your kind words. The actual funeral is 10 am tomorrow and then there is the trip to the cemetary (about 120 miles ) for graveside services. I am beat, worn out. I must try to sleep. But I had to thank y’all first.
( Now WeirdDave fet to your thread, we are drinking a beer over there !)
I second that sentiment. When my father died, at his memorial service, the minister gave time for anyone who wanted to stand and say a few words. I was so amazed and touched by the number of people whose lives he touched. I of course knew he was a good man, and I loved him, but I had no idea just how many others loved him as well. My mother, who had been divorced from him for over 20 years, came to the service and cried along with his children. What a testament. I can hope for no more from my life, to be remembered so well.
Your uncle was a good man. I know that sometimes missing him can be terribly painful, but remember that he is now beyond the suffering of this world, and he will forever live in your heart.
I can not relate to your situation, and truly, no one else can. This man sounds like one in 6billion, and it is a sad day that his life came to an end. My grandmother passed away a month or so ago, and I still have not let it go. You will never be able to let it go. He will always be a part of you, living on in family stories, and your thoughts of how he touhed your life, and the lives of others. You sound like you are much attached to this man as a father, and brother figure, and he more than filled it. I can only offer my condolences.
Ayesha, you are strong person, and did not deserve this. but trust me, we are always open as a shoulder to cry on, and, if need be, feel free to E-mail me at adbrown@brainerddispatch.com
as a musician, I too agree with Zenster-
although people might RUN away from my rendidition of “learn to fly” by the Foo Fighters, I feel that that song would be best for the occasion
so anyhow, I agree with Zenster
Your uncle sounds like one of those special people who touched your life so profoundly that you will NEVER be without him.
(((((((Ayesha)))))))
A book that helped me to cope with the loss of my mom a few years ago was called “Living With an Empty Chair.” It was the most down-to-earth and reasonable book on the grief process that I found, and I read a lot of them at the time.
“Mayhap a funeral among men is a wedding feast among the angels.”
– Gibran Kahlil Gibran
I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your Uncle Dale. He sounds like an amazing man. Take care of yourself, Ayesha. You and your loved ones are in my thoughts and prayers.
Words cannot express the feeling.
Simple writing, and human language lack the necessary feel.
Know that there are people all over the nation today that feel your loss, and envy your knowing of one who sounds like one of the great, silent heros of our day.
I am home now. It has been a long hard day, but seeing all of your responces has warmed my heart. It was a lovely service complete with an Air Force Honor Guard. One of his son’s sang and another read a poem he wrote for my Uncle.
** Zenster and Ad Noctum ** you will be glad to know that his children did play some of his music. I swear I could almost see him standing there playing and singing as those songs played. They played a cover he did of Porter Wagner’s Satisfied Mind and another song called On our Corner.
I have arranged to get copies of the tapes they have so I can turn them into cd’s .
** Linx, ** I know, that was the first time and the last that he was able to see it happening and stop it, but one time was enough for me.
** Tristan , Serendipity, Tabithina, Scotticher , Minxsmom, Geobabe, casdave, Spider Woman and Jimmy Nipples** Thank you all very much. Yes he was so special to us and there will never be another quite like him.
The people of this board have comforted me through many sad times in my life in the past several months. There are no words that will ever be good enough to thank you all with.
