I have a wrinkled flap

I had laser surgery to correct my vision about a week and a half ago. For those not familiar with the procedure, they essentially slice a flap in your cornea (cornea is the medical term for “eyeball”), burn some out of the middle with a <Austin Powers impression> frickin’ laser </APi> while telling you in surprised voices that you “seem nervous”, then replace the flap. I now have very nearly 20/20 vision in my left eye, which in terms of sheer magnitude of medical miracles is approximately equivalent to making Janet Reno really hot. The right eye, however, is neither so good nor so correctable with glasses due to the previously mentioned wrinkle. So for the next week until they can fix my wrinkle, I have to attempt to be a full time computer programmer despite the fact that for all intensive purposes I cannot read, and attempting to do so gives me a headache unlike any other I have ever had that didn’t involve intoxicated waterskiing with a concussion (do not try it). Driving at night is also a bit challenging, but I’ll not get into that now.

Despite my current situation, I believe that a week or two from now I will be highly recommending LASIK to anyone considering it. I’ll let you know when I’ve decided for sure. Even with a wrinkled cornea I can function without glasses for most things, which is pretty cool for a guy who was legally blind up until recently. A typical eye exam for me used to start out something like this:

doctor: (projects giant “E” onto the chart) You can see the letter on the chart now, right?
me: What chart? Who said that?

Those of you with natural 20/20 vision are all bastards. Please forgive any typoes.

Damnit, I want surgery… Hate these flippin’ glasses.
The downside to being a knife collector in a knife store is that half my earnings go right back in there. I cant afford to have my eyes fixed…

sob

Yeah, I’ll probably get my eyeballs lasered someday.

But mostly I just wanted to say that this thread title has great potential for the “Sequential Thread Title” discussions…

Thank you, thank you very much. I try to make even my MPSIMS posts useful for something, if only more MPSIMS posts…