Some of us are scared of getting dental work done, even the more innocuous stuff like cleanings. I do not like them messing with my mouth. I become terrified when they have to do anything beyond cleanings, as in I’m so scared I want either drugs or nitrous or they’re not doing it. I sure as hell wouldn’t go back to the OP’s dentist, and I think I’d have left earlier!
You can’t tell somebody who is has panic attacks at the dentist to suck it up. That’s just cruel. Such reactions aren’t rational.
Cruel? Maybe.
Outlandish, inappropriate behavior? Definitely.
Issues? Most assuredly.
(Is there an echo in here?)
Crap. Double post. Oh kind mods…
Wait, you asked the dentist to stop doing what they were doing to you, and they refused?
Isn’t that treatment without consent, and thus very, very illegal?
Anecdote: When I went to a dentist (for the first time in a couple years) this past summer and needed a filling, the dentist was a saint. She explained absolutely everything she was going to do before doing it, and several times, when she could see I was getting a bit wiggy, asked if I wanted her to stop for a few seconds. If more dentists were that patient, I honestly think fewer people would be so scared of them.
totally, white rabbit. you speak the truth. oh, does this particular subject touch a nerve… all i can say is that **chiefscott ** has had way too much fun in the dentist’s chair for his own good.
i’ve had several very bad experiences in that chair, most of which were not the dentist’s or the oral surgeon’s fault to begin with. notice i say ‘most.’ there is a certain OS i would cheefully have assassinated if i could find someone to do the wetwork! :mad:
unfortunately for me, i happen to have a high pain threshhold in the mouth – until the decay passes the point of no return, and then there isn’t enough novacaine on the damn planet to bring the pain under control. as a result, i now have to be knocked out for root canals. the panic attacks i suffer otherwise are legendary. i never used to have this problem, but i do now (thanks to that incompetant quack) and my dentist knows it and so does my long-suffering oral surgeon (the good one).
i’d bet my next paycheck **apocalypso ** does indeed have an exposed nerve. a nasty combination. i feel for him (or her). i don’t care if uncle whatsit was trying to do him a favor. the dentist sounds like a complete jerk. that’s bullshit, ladies and gentlemen. don’t put up with that kind of behavior – find one who isn’t. good medical people are out there. poll your friends, coworkers, angie’s list if it’s in your area, the state dental board for heaven’s sakes… there ARE options.
and report that idiot. we spend too much damn money on health care in this country to put up with that kind of unprofessional treatment. just because so and so has letters after their name that doesn’t guarantee they should be practicing in the first place.
:::getting down off my soapbox now:::: 
This is the salient point and I would ask that you please file a complaint as soon as possible with the American Dental Association. At any rate, an inquiry should be made after the complaint, and they can determine if you are “being a drama queen.” If you feel you were mistreated, and most of all if you feel the dentist was continuing without care for your well-being, then complain. Let the ADA take it from there.
That way, if the dentist tries to bill you for the unfinished work, your ass is covered with your creditors. If someone else has a problem with the dentist, there will be a history of complaints which will help others get justice. For all you know, this dentist is one complaint away from having their license removed anyway.
Don’t agonize over it, just file the complaint as soon as possible, because after a while it will be too late. At which point, not only can you not get taken seriously, but the dentist will be at liberty to eff up your credit score. I speak from experience.
Yup. Sounds like a full-blown panic attack to me. It’s very hard to control one that bad when you’re in the midst of it. Now that you’ve calmed down a bit, Apocalypso, I hope that you’ll consider going to a therapist who can help you deal with future attacks. And maybe you can see your doctor about getting some kind of sedative you can take before seeing a dentist (with the dentist’s approval, of course) so you can be calmer through the procedure.
My take on your experience is that maybe the woman you saw is on the quiet side. Instead of asking someone to move their head a bit, she’s probably used to giving a gentle push or pull. Most people would get the hint and comply, thinking nothing about it, but you’d already gone into panic mode and a good part of your mind was telling you to get as far away from her as possible. The little bit of your mind that was still functioning logically was trying to get you to stay in the chair but the panicky part was saying, “At least I can move my head as far away as possible!” You unknowingly resisted the dentist’s gentle efforts to get you to stay in the proper spot and she started to use more force. Probably not as much as you think she did but enough to send you into panic attack overdrive and become totally unhinged.
I hope you do see a therapist about that. Like it or not, we all have to see dentists on occasion. The next time a filling comes out, say, when you’re on a trip to another city, you again may not have the option to get gassed. It may be much easier on you if you had some tools (and maybe pills) to help you through it.
I wish you luck.
Thanks to everyone for their feedback.
Yes, I got some issues with my dad’s uncle that I don’t want to get into right now because it doesn’t really have anything to do with the dentist. But I was very upset over this whole incident, and for him to basically laugh at me, tell me I was being a baby, and dismiss the whole thing really set me off. I have a difficult time talking to him under normal circumstances, let alone a situation like this. My dad pretty much refuses to talk to him at all. My grandfather (Uncle’s brother in law) flat out refuses to let the man set foot in his house. So it’s not just me. The whole trip down he was getting on my case about things he had incomplete or no knowledge of (comments about my work, about various other family members, etc, etc). The man is an annoying, blithering idiot, to put it mildly, and that is the reason most of the family dislikes him.
BUT I try to at least be polite to him because he’s close to my grandmother, who is near and dear to me. Even gram gets royally pissed at him from time to time though.
Anyways, I didn’t go off on him until he verbally pushed me past what pretty much anyone else in the family would’ve put up with. Yes, I was appreciative up to that point. Even though he badgered me the whole way down, while we were at the dentists office, and in the car on the way back. At this point I’m still in the panic attack, I’m angry, upset, and physically shaking. I’m not going to listen to this man further badger me. Period. I requested he stop the car so I can get out. He refuses. That’s when I started yelling and cursing at him. He still refused to stop the car, and continued to mock and badger me. That’s when I opened the door and told him to stop the car or I’m jumping out. Favor or not, I’m NOT putting up with this bulls***. Not from anyone. Especially not from him.
Her yanking on my face and lip was what put me IN panic mode. I’m nervous and anxious up to this point, like I am every time I go to the dentist. I’m also very tired (busy day at work) and in a considerable amount of pain. When she was hooking and yanking the corner of my mouth I was a bit shocked, and slightly irritated, but still relatively docile. Then came the swab and refusal to stop something I indicated was causing severe pain. This was when I started to panic and have second thoughts. The dentist seemed very exasperated with my nervousness and repeated questions, and was basically trying to get me to shut up and lie still. Then she started yanking on my lip and yelling at me to move my head, and that was when I started to spazz out and trying to get out of the chair.
I’m not normally the type of person given to exaggeration, I try to be very careful to say exactly what I mean and I mean what I say. The finger hooked in to the side of my mouth was not a gentle tug. It was some forceful, insistent pulling.
When she was pulling on my lip, she pulled hard enough to lift my entire head slightly off of the headrest. I HAVE been to some dentists that were a bit heavy handed, and this was beyond the worst of them.
I was tired, nervous, and in pain and probably talked too much and asked too many questions. Apart from that, I was trying to be cooperative.
When I had my wisdom teeth yanked (all 4 at once), they put an oxygen mask on my, which covered my nose and mouth. The mask was loose, and some air was escaping and getting into my eyes. I told the assistant, and she said it was supposed to be like that don’t worry. She then had me count backwards from 10. I think I got to 5 or 6 before I went out. I woke up what seemed like a few minutes later, and asked the assistant when we were going to start. She said “you’re done”, and that was it. My gums were sore for a few days, but they gave me some pain medication. I had to eat soft foods like potatoes and ice cream for a few days. No biggie there. Oh, and if you smoke, plan on quitting for about a week after your operation. Smoking will dry up the sockets and you don’t want that.
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Try not to worry – it might not be that bad. Two years ago I had three of my wisdom teeth removed under local anesthesia. The oral surgeon and his assistants were absolutely wonderful. I had some pain over the next couple of days, but nothing unbearable. The surgeon did such a good job that my face didn’t even swell up.
Good luck, BrknButterfly. Please post back and tell us how it goes.
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And yet you decide to use him for his dentist.
He is a saint. A lesser man wouldn’t have stopped the car as you got out.
If you don’t mind my asking, and if you feel comfortable answering: how old are you?
Have you ever had an abcessed tooth? Trust me, it’s not a “mountain out of a molehill.” I was given percocet, myself, but the doctor also reccomended vicodan. They don’t prescribe hard drugs like that for hang nails.
And yes, poking around with a q-tip, even one with numbing gel would cause some serious pain.
As for the OP, I’d have bitten her.
You definitely sound like a bit of a whiner.
On the other hand, you write pretty well.
On balance, I’m in favor.
I’d chalk it up to a learning experience - don’t go to dentists recommended by idiots.