I realize this is a sketch but it’s still pretty funny.
Although I wondered if there really was such a thing as voice activated elevators and wouldn’t they still have to have some sort of emergency release in cases of people that can’t talk or the AI doesn’t understand?
My uncle has lived in England for over thirty years, but he still has a Scottish accent. It’s a thoroughly middle-class accent though. About as close to neutral BBC received pronunciation as you can get and still be distinctly Scots. The way Google Voice transcribes his voicemails is absolutely hilarious.
Computer? Hello computer?
Well, obviously they will work out in the kinks in the next couple hundred years.
Reminds me of every dialogue I have with my TV/Cable/Internet supplier.
“Welcome to Charter’s automated attendant. Press or say ‘One’ for Internet technical support.”
“One.”
“You have not made a selection. Please press or say ‘One’ for Internet technical support.”
“ONE.”
"It appears that you have selected Option Number Two. If correct, press or say “One.”
“FUCKING ONE, You idiot computer!!!”
“You have selected the ‘verbal abuse’ option. One moment, please, while I connect you with that department.”
{♫ Doo-bee-doo-bee doo. ♫ Da-da-da-da da, ♫ doo-bee-doo-bee-doo…♫}
“Welcome to Charter’s automated attendant. Press or say ‘One’ for Internet technical support.”
“AGENT! AGENT! AGENT!”
“If you wish to speak to an agent, say, ‘Agent’ at any time.”
“FUCKING AGENT!!!”
“Welcome to Charter’s automated attendant. Press or say ‘One’ for Internet technical support…”
Huh. That’s a sketch from a BBC sketch show, Burnistoun, not ‘Star Productions.’
That is almost word for word like the conversation I had several weeks ago with Social Security’s voice recognition system. An abomination before the Lord.
Funny!
“Are you from the same part of England as Dick Van Dyke?”
“Freeeeedooooooom!”
This! ALL voice recognition systems are abominations, just on the very principle of it, (even if a few of them work halfway decently). I’ve discovered that some such systems (at least the ones I’ve used) still accept push-button input – just count the options as the voice-menu reads them, and if you want, say, the third one, then push 3.
When voice systems were newer, this was less common. I gather the number-entry is more commonly accepted now by popular demand.
Automated phone-answering systems are high on my list of inventions the world didn’t need.
ETA: And, thankfully, many such systems will still connect you to a live operator if you press 0 enough times in a row, or some other unrecognized input enough times in a row. Whether such operator speaks intelligible English is another matter.
Yum. Me too. 
I’ll be in my bunk. 