Well, you could always take opium WHILE you’re exercising.
Ativan is what my in-laws all take. I bummed one off my MIL for my SIL’s funeral, and boy! Did it fuck. me. up. But I’m on the small side and hadn’t built up a resistance to it. MIL takes .5 mg I think. And she gave me one of SIL’s by accident. I believe hers were more than twice as strong.
Anyhoo, long story short…after twenty years on these, MIL’s doctor is worried about addiction (which they are, but who gives a shit when you’re 81?). She’s now putting her on Zoloft, which she says are pretty good. I hear of lots of people taking them, and they seem to be happy with the results.
Eve, I’m sorry you’re feeling bad. I’m sure it’s your mom’s health that’s causing the brunt of your anxiety. I wish there was something I could say. It’s the shitty side of life and there’s nothing to do but get through it. Wishing you the best.
I can appreciate that: I’m so lazy that I’m eyeing women who already have kids. That’s why I was thinking of the mentally stimulating stuff, since it is a lot easier to do something physical when it is enjoyable. (Besides, what could be more elegant, graceful, and pulchritudinous than fencing?) It is worth noting that you know you and your life’s experiences a lot better than I do, which I respect, and I hope I didn’t come off as being pushy or prosletyzing.
To be honest, my woes are chronic and, if I’m reading you correctly, your woes are acute, though no less distressing and burdensome. I certainly do wish you the best of luck.
FTR, when I broke my hand last November I found the cast (and later, a splint) to be oppressive. (A look at the clothes I wear should make it obvious that a snug, non-removable restraint would make me crazy.) The distress became so acute that I was beginning to contemplate home amputation w/ a hatchet, since a one-handed life would be better than ten more minutes in a cast. I was given some Xanax and it took the edge off indeed. I didn’t feel intoxicated and I wasn’t saying things I’d regret as I do when I’m boozed up; however, it took an acute and violently distressing anxiety and made it a mere annoyance. YMMV, of course.
For some reason, I’m not picturing Eve with a lampshade on her head doing the Charleston. But that’s me.
Tallulah Bankhead: “Of course cocaine isn’t addictive, dahling—I should know, I’ve been using it for years!”
Why, thank you, dear!
YMMV, cause for me, it’s just about the strongest sleep aid I’ve ever had, and furthermore, gives me the strongest, not weakest, hangover of them all. Of course, I’ve never had a sleeping pill other than the antihistamine ones, but compared to these, and even to massive amounts of alcohol, the emotional and physical hangover for me is immense.
But if your sleep patterns are screwed up who knows, it may help.
Hi Eve
Xanax works wonders for me, but, it leaves me with a hangover. To me it’s like alcohol. A fast exit from this stinky world for a couple of hours, thick tongue, indecent ahem speech and trouble getting up the stairs.
It’s great. 
But beware of the next day.
I feel even worse than I did to begin with, am tired and irritable.
That doesn’t mean I don’t take it, now and then. Sometimes life needs to go away for 24 hours.
And this will sound corny: You can mail me. I can’t give you advise, can’t make things better for you, and - worst - can’t make you smile [in fact, why would you mail] 
, but I’m great at listening.
Eve for all the creepiness of its commercials (just what the hell is that purple upside down word balloon bouncing around supposed to be?) Zoloft did the trick for me when I needed an anti depressant. It was a nice .5 mg pick me up for the nine months I took it. You probably don’t want to hear this, but I also decided to combine it with some counseling over the course of a few months. I came out of it so much better. I really believe the combination of the two was the best thing I ever did for myself.
My .02
There are a couple of pictures floating around of Eve looking quite fine in a little black dress, so this does have possibilities.
Eve, I know you said you’re allergic to exercise, but it really can help. I started exercising a few months ago (and if you knew me IRL, you’d know I also have a pretty severe exercise allergy too :D) and there were a few occasions when I’d had a crummy day, dragged myself to the gym, communed with a treadmill or elliptical, and realized I felt better for about an hour.
As a confirmed couch-potato whose preferred method of mood-alteration generally involves calorie intake, this did not please me. But it worked, dammit! :mad: (and it can counteract the main side-effect of the next suggestion).
Other alternatives: Well, it’s risky to get hooked on food to deal with stress, but this can be useful in the sort term, taken in moderation. When Papa Zappa and I were dealing with major kid-related stressors a few years ago, we developed a 2-gallon-a-week Breyer’s habit. See, no matter how crappy and stressful and hopeless a day we’d had, at the end of it, there was always a lovely big bowlful of Mint Chocolate Chip waiting for us. In other words, there was always something good to look forward to each day. Ultimately we had to wean ourselves off that regimen or we wouldn’t be able to fit through doors any more!
Fur therapy. A purring cat is a wonderful antidepressant.
Y’know, I gotta try me some of this stuff. I know all this junk about benzos, except what they actually feels like.
Funny story: My father-in-law had to get an MRI, and he’s terribly claustrophobic. So they gave him a tab of Valium before getting the scan, and he was blotto, having never even seen the stuff before. He’s one sober gentleman. So after getting home (mother-in-law drove him, thank goodness), he was still pretty loopy, and acting a tad out-of-character. We asked him how things were going sort of facetiously, to which he replied “Boy, this Valium is good stuff!”
Eve, sorry to hear that you are so down. I have suffered from attacks of depression for years, but have yet to seek treatment so I will be curious as to the solution you find. I wait the black moods out, fighting back the suicidal thoughts, knowing that it is an unbalance in the body chemistry. One way to bounce back, at least temporarily, is to get a big release of endorphins going. That means sex! I don’t know what your situation is, but if there is no Adam, get yourself a boy-toy (or girl-toy, whatever).
Keep us posted.
Yes… I know what I’m about to say isn’t what Mama Zappa (cool name!) meant.
Yes! Fur therapy! Mink! Chinchilla! Ermine! A Mrs. Drysdale Fox Stole! Just the ticket, Eve.
Eve, my love, since people are coming right out and recommending stuff, I guess I can be a bit bolder about my own experience with Klonopin (called Rivotril here in Canada and elsewhere, but still clonazepam).
When I went psycho six years ago (as opposed to when I went psycho a couple of months ago), they said “Yes, yes, you’re depressed, here’s some Serzone [which has since been pulled from the market in many countries] and some Imovane for sleep [since we can’t get Ambien in Canada].” I couldn’t tolerate the Serzone, so after a panic attack, I saw a doctor and he told me to stop taking it, and meanwhile gave me more Imovane.
But the anxiety was increasing, even though I was off work, and they put me on Paxil (which works for some people with anxiety). No relief. Finally I went and demanded something be done about the anxiety, because I couldn’t take it anymore. I told them the only time I felt remotely better was before bed, when I’d taken the Imovane.
I was given a prescription for clonazepam, and started it right away. I was expecting warm fuzzies, or to feel drunk, but I really didn’t feel anything at first. The next day, however, some friends asked me to go clubbing, and that’s the first time I remember feeling OK. Just… OK with the world, and not afraid of everything. It wasn’t a warm, drunk feeling; rather, it was a lack of anxiety.
Now, someone else on Klonopin mentioned never having developed a tolerance for it. Neither have I, and I’ve been taking it for six years. I’m “allotted” up to three 0.5 mg tabs a day, but I rarely take more than two, and sometimes I take just one, with my morning meds.
Someone else mentioned mood stabilizers of the anticonvulsant variety (e.g. Depakote [divalproex sodium], which I now take and has worked wonders). Having met you, in my non-doctor opinion, I really don’t think you need a mood stabilizer, but then again, I haven’t spent a day or days with you. Besides, mood stabilizers are really a pain in terms of figuring out the right dose, and how much to take at what times of the day.
There was a really good study by the WHO that I read on the web several months back about the safety and proper use of benzodiazepines. The conclusion was that they were safe and effective first-line treatments for many disorders. I believe this study was in part to counter the benzo-hysteria over in Europe (especially in the U.K., but I won’t link to the site). I’ll try to find it again.
Anyway, in your case, I think a longer-acting benzo like Klonopin or Valium would be preferable to a shorter-acting one like Xanax. That’s my opinion, though.
Eve, I’m reluctant to offer any kind of advice, but I asked my nutritionist friend what she would recommend. I don’t think think she would give you any “hippie shit”, as she told me what to take to lower my blood pressure (was 210/96, now 130/70) and cholesterol (was to 208/106, now 160/62), without perscription drugs.
Anyway, this is what she recommends:
5HTP (Hydroxytryptophan)
Tyrosine B-complex
Take care, Kiddo.
Ask your doctor about Sarafem.
It’s done my wife wonders.
Sarafem = fluoxetine = Prozac.
And the winner is . . . Klonapin!
Hey, glad to hear you’ve found something! Is it more-or-less that Martini-in-pill-form you were looking for? (I don’t mean to say that derisively; a drink after work or with dinner is a well-established and reasonably safe means of winding down after a rough day).
Well, I took one after I got home and don’t notice much of any effect . . . The bottle says, “May cause dizziness or drowsiness. Alcohol may intensify this effect.” My friend David says, “That’s not a warning, it’s a serving suggestion!” Wonder how Klonapin goes with OTC sleeping pills . . . ?