Disaster. That’s all I can call it.
I’d heard of it going on elsewhere… I’d always hoped and prayed that it would never happen here, but now it has.
It started so innocently. I was mindlessly channel surfing when I passed a new channel, with programming that looked oddly taped.
With slowly dawning horror I realized that the worst had occurred.
I knew about Mrs. Tygr’s affinity for these things, but I’d always figured we were safe since she worked during the day. Of course, I began to get slightly worried when she got pregnant and I knew she’d be around the house during the day. But I knew I’d figure something out between now and October…
And now Time/Warner Cable has taken that decision out of my hands.
We are now getting SoapNet. :eek: [sup]-Aughh!![/sup]
That’s twenty four hours a day of soap operas. During primetime they show that day’s installments of various series. She’s going to be able to catch up on everything that’s been going on…
I swear, she wouldn’t be this happy if Ben & Jerry’s opened a store on our front lawn…
Please lend me your strength to get through this dark time.
Tygr, sweetie, darling, c’mere…
A little closer…
That’s close enough…
::WHAPS Tygr “a good one upside the haid”::
Criminitly, boy, DON’T DO THAT!!! You had me scared half to death that something happened to the Mrs. or the cub or both!!!
Sheesh! Just think of it as an extension of the Lifetime Channel. Think of all the video tapes you will save, since she won’t have to tape her shows for viewing later.
Now be a good Tygr and run to the store: pick up some Ben & Jerry’s for her (aw heck, a pint for me too, since you put me through that), and she will be in heaven. Soaps and ice cream - she’ll appreciate the doting.
Look at it as an opportunity to enjoy some of your own hobbies. With the time the Mrs. spends on her soaps, you can have some uniterrupted computer time, or tune in to something else on another TV, elsewhere in the house.
Personally, I’d recommend a copy of DiabloII, with the expansion pack.
But seriously… having an SO with a significant time-wasting hobby can be a blessing. At least now, you don’t have to worry about her nagging you about your useless hobbies.
Now, now, it can’t be as bad as all that. And look at all the free time you will have!
Just remember not to panic when Mrs. Tygr tells you that Ashley is a bitch, and what she did to poor Wesley is just terrible, and that Natalie is pregnant with Bill’s dead brother’s father’s baby.
:::whapping Tygr on the other side of the head:::
And there’s more where that came from if you ever scare me like that again! Sheesh!
Soaps are what your better half needs right now, man. She can turn them on, veg out, and forget about the impending life-altering situation. Let her enjoy them. Because after the baby comes, she won’t get this opportunity for a loooooooong time.
Oh, and while you’re at it, get her some ice cream.
Promise me she isn’t into Passions. I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry at that show when I saw it.
Keep yer voice down, will ya?
Mrs. Boo doesn’t know about it yet.
Soaps are prime fodder for giving the MST3K treatment. My Mom and Sister banned me from being in the room when they were on. Juliana doesn’t mind my commentary, because she agrees most of the time.
I don’t watch soaps much anymore, except when there’s an interesting storyline on. I do enjoy SoapNet, because I’m also at work when the soaps come on. I love the reruns of Ryan’s Hope, which I saw during summers when I was a child. I occasionally watch All My Children and One Life To Live, but that’s all.
SoapNet is cool. Especially with a pint of Ben and Jerry’s.
I’m sorry, but there is simply no support or help that I could give you that would be sufficient to get you through this horrendous time. 24 hours of soaps!!!
You might wanna try leaving a dummy of yourself in a seat in the living room, then sneaking out to a bar.
Hopefully your wife won’t notice as she will be too engrossed with Biff’s wife, Tammy, being pregnant with Billy Joe’s baby, especially as Tammy was told she could never have children, and now she’s in love with the doctor at the clinic, even though he’s gay and having an affair with Biff, and…
I feel for you, Tygr. I swore off soaps several years ago, because they are a mind-sucking abyss. At least they are for me. I get hooked, real fast.
But this SoapNet thing sounds interesting. (God help me.) If they show reruns of “Santa Barbara” and “Edge of Night”, I’m doomed. DOOMED.
I honestly wasn’t trying to scare y’all, screech-owl and Persephone. I was just trying to communicate the horrible, despairing, sinking feeling I got when I first turned that channel on. See, I married her 'cause she’s smart and has much-higher than average helping of common sense. Which is why it’s such a mystery how she can get into these gawd-awful cheesy “stories”.
But, okay… whap!-whap! “Thank you, ladies! May I have another?”
Gawd, do I HAVE to? Think of both cheesy daytime dramas AND cheesy TV movies? I told y’all I gots a weak stomach…
Actually, she watches All My Children and occasionally General Hospital, the ABC soaps. (Yes, she’s soooo happy that Ryan’s Hope is on, because she, too, loved watching that while growing up.) And I told her I’d watch them with her, if she’d turn the sound down - the only redeeming quality those shows have is some HOT womenwhap!-whap![sub]sorry…[/sub]
I DO try the MST3K treatment, until I get a withering glare if I talk over something “important”. And she does try to explain story lines to me, but she knows to stop when my eyes glaze over…
MrVisible - we just got a new iMac, so you dam’ straight I’m gonna catch up on my gamingwhap![sub]I mean, “catch up on the house cleaning…”[/sub] The only difficulty comes when she wants to play on the computer AND watch SoapNet. Guess I’d better get to the li-berry…
And just so’s y’all know I AM doting - she got Tygr’s special, home-made Breyer’s Oreo Mint Cookies-n-cream with Hershey’s syrup milkshake last night. :)[sup] -So there.[/sup]
24 hours of soaps?!?!?!?!
Sorry, Tygr, but nothing I can possibly say or do could relieve your fears, because I’m terrified myself.
<assumes fetal position, cowers in a corner>