I pit Craigslist Cleveland furniture listings

elmwood · February 21, 2006, 1:25am

I’m jealous of every other hip and trendy city out there. You see, when I look at furniture listings for Craigslist in those areas, I actually see nice furniture for the most part, at reasonable prices. Not here in Cleveland, though. Furniture that would normally end up on the curb in Denver, Seattle and Portland is being listed on Craigslist for ridiculous amounts. There’s very little jewels among the junk, either - it’s mostly tacky 1960s and 1970s-era crap.

Sure, the sellers might say “it’s comfortable.” It’s baboon-ass ugly, too. Go to craigslist furniture listings in other cities, and you’ll actually see nice, neutral, tasteful stuff. Here, it’s furniture straight out of the Brady Bunch house; orange naugahyde chairs, bulky coffee tables, and recliners with Bicentennial eagle fabric. I’m afraid to look at the electronics listings in Cleveland craigslist; it’s probably nothing but console televisions and 8-track tape players.

There’s some newer furniture out there - not much, but some. Unfortunately, what little there is is flowery, femmy, kountry foo-foo stff and tacky Rent-A-Center rejects.

Prices? Paying $500 for a used couch the original owner paid $600 for – and it’s usually covered by some cheesy, flowery, foo-foo kountry upholstery at that – is no bargain. It’s like computer pricing at the Salvation Army; “Well, that 486 cost $3,000 back in 1995, so we could probably get $2,000 for it now.” People are also asking outrageous prices for used mattresses. Fucking gross. I’ll buy something from the spammed national retailer ads that nobody tags for removal before I spend $400 on some nasty ass used mattress with pee and cum stains.

Here’s what passes as good deals for used furniture in Cleveland:

El_Kabong · February 21, 2006, 3:05am

Hey, I’ve been looking for one of them Cleveland Steamer things. If you see one on Craigslist, could you let me know?

Meanwhile, concerning the first item you linked to, does that price include the lovely throw with the giant screaming eagle on it? 'Cause that really just ties the whole set together.

JohnBckWLD · February 21, 2006, 3:16am

I always assumed the sale of used mattresses was illegal - even on Craigslist.

It looks like it came off the set of Married With Children.

Shagnasty · February 21, 2006, 3:40am

Why would you think that? Even some hotels sell theirs. I bought one in college for $30. It smelled like I was a real player.

Maybe people are hoping that a set designer for Sanford and Son - The Movie is going to swoop in and make them rich.

Stuffy · February 21, 2006, 3:57am

Well technically you shouldn’t be flaming craigslist, but Clevelanders and their over inflated sense of value.

On a related note, I purchaes two very nice bunkbeds off craigsist, barely used for about 30% of new.

Amp · February 21, 2006, 4:01am

God I’m so glad I moved out of that crap hole.

I mean, Cleveland rocks?

samclem · February 21, 2006, 4:59am

What kind of price level do they get in Cleveland for pink flamingos and chrome balls? Hmmm?

They gots to be rare in Denver.

ZipperJJ · February 21, 2006, 5:42am

My friend got that exact same set in the first (minus sweet throw) from the Goodwill in Cuyahoga falls. For $30.

You can’t actually sit on the cushions in the table thingy. It’s made of cardboard.

Mama_Tiger · February 21, 2006, 5:56am

Damn. I gave away a sleeper sofa a few months ago – muted green/cream/beige plaid, a bit older but a really comfortable bed – and couldn’t even find any takers. It never would have occurred to me to try to sell the thing. Except apparently if I was in Cleveland; I could have asked $500 for it, easy!

Dorjan · February 21, 2006, 6:24am

Cleveland is NOT the place for used shit. All of the thrift stores suck here too, as I’ve lamented in another thread.

elmwood · February 21, 2006, 6:33am

Cleveland must be where old, tacky furniture goes to die - only it’s given CPR and shots of adrenaline, and goes on to live yet another life, healthier than ever.

My question: why are Craigslit furniture listings in Cleveland so bad compared to other cities? Do people here love flowery fabrics more than in Portland and San Diego? Does the cold weather somehow prolong the lifespan of 1970s-era furniture?

elmwood · February 21, 2006, 2:56pm

Dear Lord, it only gets worse.

http://cleveland.craigslist.org/fur/135627648.html

Rebo · February 21, 2006, 3:15pm

My eyes! They burn!

Dorjan · February 21, 2006, 3:20pm

My God, I live in Euclid. I will persoanlly go and burn that couch.

GingerOfTheNorth · February 21, 2006, 3:38pm

This weekend I bought a Depression-era walnut server for $50.00, and a few months ago I got a buffet and china cabinet from the same time frame for $20. We also recently purchased a dining room set for $100.00.

Baltimore might suck, but its Craigslist doesn’t. Our Freecyclers, on the other hand…

elmwood · February 21, 2006, 3:49pm

I’m in South Euclid. I’ll buy the gasoline.

Rebo · February 21, 2006, 3:53pm

I read that and actually thought, "What the hell is a walnut server? People actually have a dish to serve walnuts?

Then I opened the link.

:smack

Zsofia · February 21, 2006, 4:23pm

Oh my god! We used to own that exact couch (the first one, with the screaming eagle. We didn’t have a screaming eagle though.) Of course this was in the 80’s. The enormously obese brother of my dad’s boss sat on it when I was little and broke the living hell out of all the springs, but of course we had to use it for years and years after that. I can still remember the smell of that couch, and the prickly upholstery!

Never knew it ended up in Cleveland, though.

BMalion · February 21, 2006, 7:50pm

The couch coffee table set from your first link also includes an ottoman, a chair, a rocking chair and end tables. I know because until recently I was married to a woman who owned the whole set! one of our earliest arguments was when I casually mentioned how nice it would be to replace the living room set. Take it from me that crap is the most painfully uncomfortable stuff you can imagine. Inurred as I am to the horrors of cheap furniture, even I found it hard to endure. Her’s even had the exact same material! (no eagle throw sadly).

During the divorce consultation my lawyer asked me If I wanted to claim the furniture, I said no thanks.

I shudder at the memory.

elmwood · February 21, 2006, 7:54pm

This can’t be good. “only a few tares.”