I pit my garage for thinking it is a vacuum cleaner.

Stupid fucking garage. You are a space that exists for no other reason than to store a vehicle or two and a variety of other shit that doesn’t belong in the house. Your mission isn’t to gather all the dirt and debris from hundreds of yards around you.

I try to keep you clean and orderly but you insist on taking in every piece of disgusting dirt that gets near you. You are the worst of sluts. Everything in your vicinity is either grassed or paved so don’t say that it is caused by the dirt around you.

I think you have a pact with the “stupid neighbor heathen children” and make yourself available to take in dead leaves from them when I am not looking. How else could this debris get through closed doors?

Garage, you SUCK! Now stop it.

At least you have a garage. All I have is a carport. And that has to be swept regularly, too. And occasionally I find raccoons in it.

At least you have a carport. All I’ve got is a soggy cardboard box. And my parents thrash me to sleep every night with a broken bottle.

At least you have a box. I have a lean-to made of tossed out copies of the Wall Street Journal. I fall asleep every night looking at papers talking about how awful the economy is. Also, mice nibble at me.

I would kill to be nibbled by mice! I get dragged into shallow swamps by crocodiles every time I try to catch a little shut-eye.

I would kill for biting gators! Every night when I go to sleep the head-on comes into my room and spends the whole night going "head-on apply directly to the forehead!.

A Garage is for vehicles?! WHo woulda thunk that? My SO is threatening to build a shed for yard tools when we have a garage that clearly is designed for yard tools in addition to storing junk, pseudo junk, new junk old junk and borrowed junk not to mention , boats, bikes, trikes, cycles, and 1 roadster.

And he sweeps it too, has a big old canister vac in there to keep it tidy. the leaves still blow in, and the oil drips in it, and the cats occassioinaly shit there too when they get locked up in it all night.

I want to convert part of the garage into a loft for his mancave, where he can keep it to his ideal standard of a clean and shiny garage space. The rest of it I want to screen in so we can hang in there in the summer!

Damn, and I was starting to like the direction this thread was going…

It would be great to have the Head-on guy! I have Enzyte Bob standing in the corner of my room all night with that ridiculous smile and his tiny boner, whistling the Enzyte tune!

was it going down? so it is the pit, I thought it was a fucking mmp.

my cats eat mice for lunch in the garage attic

Enzyte Bob? LUXURY!

I am unable to sleep because Vince from Shamwow is constantly throwing water at me only to soak it up.

ShamWOW!

LUXURY!

As soon as I went to bed in the middle of the street, I had to get up to walk to work.
I used to dream of owning a garage, let alone a car.
But you know, we were happy in those days, though we were poor.