I pit my over zealous roommate

[MacTech]

@Kimballkid

What happened to ooga booga? I always thought it was ooga booga. I want my ooga booga back!!

I thought it was Snoo-Snoo?

[Miller]

@Almace

Unfortunately he met my girlfriend when I was moving in.

Tell him she’s a dude.

[lel]

Be nice and tell him that when he becomes an atheist, you’ll support him. He’ll need the support.

[Ranger_Jeff]

So, I’m guessing short sheeting his bed, filling his pillow with pudding, or spreading peanut butter and jelly between the fitted sheet and the flat sheet is just out of the question?

[SanVito]

@BrainGlutton

That phrasing – “to university,” not “to a university” – suggests you’re a Brit.

Merciful Og, you have those types in the UK too?!

Not any more, we packed them all off your way, remember? 1620 and all that?

[Mama_Zappa]

@Oakminster

So get yourself a copy of the Necronomicon, a cow skull, some black and/or red candles, some incense, and redecorate your side of the room…

Nah. What about “love thine enemy”. Offer him lots of love. Hugs and kisses and cuddles.

Cheaper, and not nearly as smelly as incense or cow skulls.

[Chimera]

@Oakminster

So get yourself a copy of the Necronomicon, a cow skull, some black and/or red candles, some incense, and redecorate your side of the room…

@Mama_Zappa

Nah. What about “love thine enemy”. Offer him lots of love. Hugs and kisses and cuddles.

Cheaper, and not nearly as smelly as incense or cow skulls.

Now now, there is no reason he can’t do both.

[Bam_Boo_Gut]

@digs

I’ve got a coworker that’s driving me crazy, but I’m now welcoming her intrusions into my life by taking a deep breath and thinking “Ok, I’m going to stay friendly and listen… and get some awesome material for The Pit”.

It really has changed my life. I now look at her as a subject I’m researching, and her close-minded, homophobic, job-hating, coworkers’ brains-poisoning comments are just grist for my literary mill. Probably the way David Sedaris thinks when his family says crazy stuff: “Ooh, where’s my notebook?”

So I guess what I’m saying is, don’t fear the Crazy Talk, encourage it, so you’ll have more stories to tell us.

I say to myself, I seem to have been thrust into some bizarre psychological experiment, hang in there self!

[alphaboi867]

@Oakminster

So get yourself a copy of the Necronomicon, a cow skull, some black and/or red candles, some incense, and redecorate your side of the room…

See I was thinking more along the line of some homoerotic art posts of scantily clad & nude men.

@Almace

Unfortunately he met my girlfriend when I was moving in.

There is such a thing as bisexuals. Or just tell him you’re experimenting.

@Almace

…Most notably he is of the belief that women will always be wrong when arguing with men because the Bible indicates (apparently) that men are and should be dominant over women in all matters…

Please tell me that either your RA or residence director is a woman. Has he tried to pull that crap on a female professor or administrator yet?

Seriously don’t bother making any effort to accommodate him or go out of your way to avoid offending, but make sure you’re staying with the letter of the university housing regulations. Strictly follow whatever your dorm’s policy on guests and/or alcohol is.

[Projammer]

@Oakminster

Death by bongo-bongo!

@Kimballkid

What happened to ooga booga? I always thought it was ooga booga. I want my ooga booga back!!

@aruvqan

I remember a few frat parties where it was almost death byOingo-Boingo …

@MacTech

I thought it was Snoo-Snoo?

Dammit! It’s death by ba-ba-loo-ba. Get it straight.

My side of the room would be so done up in a depressing Cthulhu Cultist motif.