Ugh. I made little sick bunny noises as I read about the colposcopy.
I had a transvaginal ultrasound a couple of times (which might be the same as the pelvic ultrasound mentioned earlier). The first time, I was already fitted with a catheter, so they just used that to fill up my bladder. I’ve never been more uncomfortable in my life than when my bladder was filled manually. Then they stuck this dildo looking thing all up in my snooter and poked around. Not cool. The swecond time, I had to hold my own pee in, having had to drink a shitload of water, and I’m already one of those “it’s been an hour, I have to pee again” people (blood sugar issues). It turns out (the first time) that I had a hemmhorraging ovarian cyst. I mean, that sucker was busted wide open. I had to get a lengthy blood transfusion to replace what had spewed into my abdominal cavity. Oh, to be 16 again!
I’m firing my gynecologists office because the doctor I saw this time talked down to me like I was a toddler, got belligerent when I said that I did not want kids ever (one of those update the full medical history things), and then interrogated me as to whether I am being abused and pretty much refused to believe me.
With a cunt like that working there, I don’t want to go back. (Yes, female gynecologist).
Jesus christ, how old are you? And what is this abuse thing - do you do martial arts or something that gets you bruised up? [back when I was a fighter type in the Society for Creative Anachronism I tended to go around with bruises on my arms, legs and torso a fair amount]
Definitely change your gyn … I have a great one that prescribed norethindrone to totally supress my menses after I complained about the cramps and bleeding out every month [PCOS] and gave me the option of trying a mirena or an ablation if I didnt want to deal with a daily pill. I figure I take a handfull of pills every day anyway [and shoot up with Byetta] so one more tiny pill doesnt matter.
The thing I hated was the biopsy of my endometrium just to confirm that the pill would not be contraindicated. I swear she was shoving a hot wire along the inside of my uteris. I still felt the burn for about a freaking month afterwards. Like a hot electrified wire laid against the inside in a long thin line…
I’m thirty. I have been telling every doctor I ever had that I never wnat children since I was 16.
I play paint ball occasionally, but I wasn’t wearing any bruises when I went to the gynecologist. That line of questioning started right after ‘You don’t want any kids, ever?’ ‘That is correct.’ ‘What would you do if you got pregnant accidentally?’ ‘I would abort.’
Then it was the line of questions about abuse and whether I was being coerced into saying I would abort, etc.
I’ve decided not to get any more pap smears. The last two came out negative and I haven’t been sexually active in years. I figure they’re checking for HPV which I evidently don’t have.
Last fall, I had a Pap done at my campus health center, and the doc there said that for an additional charge, they can do a lab test to see if the woman has HPV
–and if she doesn’t, she can more or less excuse herself from Paps for about three years if she is not sexually active and/or low risk (I may be mis-remembering something in that last part, but I think that’s what she said).
So it’s an extra thirty bucks there to get the HPV test done.
The last time I got the ole double shoehorn, I kicked the doctor and put my foot in her sample tray. There has to be a better way- maybe a nice vibe with a Qtip on the end? C’mon Medical Industrial Complex-put some thought into it
I’m fine unless they use ‘the brush’, which has only happened twice. It looks like a miniature of a chimney sweep’s brush and they used the same technique. I had such bad cramping the first time that I rang up and told the doc that something had gone terribly wrong, she said to hold a hot water bottle over my stomach until the pain faded, they didn’t advise of that particular side-effect before the test because it only happened to one in four patients (at 25% odds, I’d have appreciated advance warning, I’d gone back to work and suddenly couldn’t walk). The second time I grabbed the highest strength painkillers the pharmacy stocked.
I had my first pap smear a week ago. I had a general anaesthetic (yes assault issues) and they threw in a colonscopy for good measure. My doctor said I would wake up and not know anything had happened - HAH!!!
I was not expecting the degree of discomfort or the blood :eek: From both :eek:
It has been a week and thought I’m not in any pain I have a definite something has been messed with feeling. Could all be psychosomatic because the whole thing has messed me up a bit.
This is making me wonder whether I’m just weird or if my doctor(s) weren’t as thorough as they should have been. I’ve never had a Pap smear that hurt or even made me uncomfortable. Well, beyond the ‘feet in the stirrups and scoot all the way down’ thing. It’s not like I want it to hurt, but it sounds like you’re talking about things that maybe haven’t happened with mine. Is my doctor leaving things out that should be done? All I’ve ever seen is the swab and the speculum.
Your doctors may have been more gentle. I find the speculum insertion and the poking and pushing somewhat uncomfortable, but the only paps that were painful to me were the ones done with the brush rather than the swab. I have had very gentle docs, though.
Gaaaa, I hate pelvic exams. I went to a new doctor last time and she said, “Hmmm, you have a very long vagina (Ummm, thanks?), we’re going to need the larger speculum.” :eek:
That said, she used a new kind of test that doesn’t involve that nasty, evil, spiny, sharp, metal brush thingy and it didn’t hurt at all.
I had one last year. I’ve worked in women’s health for years, so I pretty much have zero shame whatsoever and a great comfort level with this sort of testing… however, the ultrasound tech was so freaked out by the presence of a vagina in the room, not to mention the giant, phallic (ahem) tool with which she was supposed to ultrasound me, that she squinched her eyes shut and looked in the opposite direction while waving the thing in the general vicinity of my vagina. I finally asked her if she’d like me to do the actual inserting, which offer greatly relieved her anxiety. Insertion complete, the ultrasound proceeded as normal.
You’d think, as an ultrasound tech, she’d have completed some actual training in the process, or at least have learned to hide her distress and think of England. I do have to say that’s the second time I’ve ever had to offer assistance to a medical practitioner, the first being a phlebotomist who appeared to believe my AC was located about an inch and a half to the left. Confidence not greatly inspired when one is being mauled with a 16g needle.
