I was at the shooting range yesterday, punching some holes in paper, when I encountered a man that must be the biggest dumbass in the county.
This guy was totally incapable of following any of the rules. I seriously think the only rule he failed to break was “No smoking on the firing line”. A short list of his transgressions:
- Stepping past over the red safety line and playing with his rifle while other people were downrange checking their targets.
Please, motherfucker. Its nice to be able to walk downrange without worrying that Gomer Pyle is going to put one in my back. What is even better is the fact that you did this twice! How many reprimands from the rangemaster does it take to get your head out of your ass?
- Attempting to walk downrange while people were still shooting.
Dude, What The Fuck? Are you trying to get shot? While I submit that you are too stupid to be allowed to breed, I’m not saying you deserve to die. But I think you will eventually accomplish that on your own. The guys shooting handguns would see your fat ass waddling across their field of fire in time to put their weapons down and tell you to get the fuck off the range, but I am zeroing in my new scope, and wouldn’t see you until your bald head was right under my crosshairs. Because of you, I was afraid to close my other eye the rest of the afternoon out of fear of you doing something boneheaded enough to get yourself smoked. And as much as I loathe you, I’d rather not do time for involuntary manslaughter on your account.
- Rapid fire.
Goddamn it! There are signs posted every 2 feet saying “NO RAPID FIRE - Keep shots 1 second apart”. Unlike you, I am actually here to practice marksmanship, not to make a bunch of noise and destroy everyone’s concentration. Especially when you are encouraging your stupid daughter to do the same thing - “C’mon, as fast as you can! Empty it!”. The fact that you boasted later about the 1 hole in the middle of your target is a testament to your dumbassery. Although I was amused by the look on your face when you saw my pistol target, what with its 2 large holes.
You see, tubby, when you take your time and aim carefully, you can actually get many of your shots to actually go close to the bulls-eye. Imagine that, 67 shots inside a 3 inch area. What happened to all that paper?? Its a mystery!
- Shoot at the targets!
What the fuck are you doing encouraging your stupid kids to shoot at stuff outside the range? I loved the part where you told your stupid son to try and hit the orange barrel in the shed up on that hillside. I’m sure it was nothing dangerous, not to mention the fact thatyou are shooting outside of the range!.
In short, fuck you. I’m sure the rangemaster was as tired of screaming at you over the PA system as I was of your very presence. I cannot fathom why they did not kick you out of the range after your second act of asshattery.
I think I can honestly say that you must indeed eat stupid food for breakfast.