Any way you can anonymously forward the emails to Jackass’s boss?
That word looks dirty to me so I tried to anagram it, and came up with “Neko N Puss”.
So if you’re using it to cosy up with a cat, it’s a triple language pun!
To the AA (roadside assistance organisation, not support for alcoholics):
Nice try, fuckers. Denied.
I recently upgraded my current account at the bank - I pay a monthly fee and get a whole bunch of benefits (lower overdraft rates, automatic multi-trip travel insurance, legal assistance, mobile phone cover, and roadside breakdown assistance)
The cost was about the same as I’ve been paying the AA just for the breakdown cover, so it made perfect sense to switch.
So my AA policy was due to renew on the 25th. I forgot all about cancelling it until the 24th, but phoned them that afternoon and told them I had no need of the policy.
“We’ll organise your refund - I’m afraid there will be a £14 admin fee for cancelling after the renewal date”
Um… No. The renewal date is the 25th, it’s now the 24th, and so I’m cancelling before the renewal date.
(an argument ensues over the precise date, in which I repeatedly tell him that I have their letter in my hand, explicitly stating the renewal date to be the 25th)
“yes, but we’ve already debited your account, so it counts…”
So I told the guy I’d be discussing the matter with my bank. I went online and checked my account, to discover that they had not in fact debited my account yet, so I cancelled the direct debit mandate.
I visited a branch of my bank today to confirm that the debit really had not gone out (you can only go back a week or so online). There was no debit before the 24th (fucking lying scumbag call centre guy), however, it turns out that the AA tried to debit my account today - the 26th - two days after I cancelled the policy.
But the debit was refused because I had cancelled the mandate online.
So… Nice try, fuckers. Denied.
I am not going to spend any more fucking money on fucking allergy drugs, because it’s winter and I’m still spending a stupid amount of money on them, so this coughing-after-working-out thing is just going to have to fucking stop, lungs. I know, it’s cold and very very dry and you don’t like the dust outside or…fuck, I have no idea what the hell your problem with the gym is, nor do I fucking care. Just please remember that you can breathe quite fine without hacking away like a dying tuberculosis victim, because we used to do that just fine before you decided that every substance outside of my body is a potentially-lethal threat.
My neighbors are deep-frying a turkey on their wooden patio.
But it’s okay, because as a safety measure they put up a splatter screen of flattened cardboard boxes.
My fire extinguishers are expired, so all I can do is keep my cell phone close by to call 911.
And you’re not taping it for America’s Funniest Home Videos? I’m shocked!
Dear Lab Monkey,
I’m not sure how things work in your world, but when I tell people that I am working on something “now”, that means that I are currently in the process of performing that task. And unless it takes you over 24 hours to install a network card in a server, that means that the last two times you told me that you were going to do that “now”, you were lying your ass off. Now, it’s no skin off my nose – I’m trying to help you fix your problem, after all. But if the motherfucking Director of Engineering gets on my ass about this again, I am going to point him right in your direction.
I wish. Now that I’ve replied to the guy with a request to be taken off of his mailing list, that probably tipped my hand. If the Mayor finds out about it now, I’ll automatically be seen as the one who notified him. I shouldn’t have responded to it. So I’m double -grrrrrr now ! :mad:
WTF happened to Mrs. Smith’s® pumpkin custard pies this year? They became teeny-tiny! So teeny-tiny that there was none left after Thanksgiving for Black Friday breakfast. Mrs. Smith’s® pumpkin custard pie is a Black Friday breakfast tradition, now dead because Mrs. Smith’s® pumpkin custard pies have become so teeny-tiny!
Srsly, apparently Mrs. Smith’s pies are one of the countless products that have been made smaller in lieu of having their prices raised. But the result here was basically a different product.
Does peanut oil get hot enough to start lumber on fire? I don’t think the cardboard boxes are for safety, I think they’re to keep the oil from getting on the patio and staining it. I used to work at KFC, so I’ve seen plenty of grease fires, but they were always caused by a thin film of grease being heated with the same amount of energy one would use to heat the entire amount. I’m not sure that an open flame would be able to ignite the oil. I’ve deep fried at least a dozen whole turkeys, and I’ve always put up cardboard. I would have no qualms about doing it on a wooden deck.
If you are going to self-diagnose, at least you could learn how to spell it.
THERE IS NO “B” ANYWHERE IN ASPERGER!
Dear Asshole in the Convenience Store,
I just want to pay for my friggin’ NyQuil and cough drops. Please stop yelling at the 17 year old girl behind the counter about the diesel prices. Do you really think if she had any control over them that she’d be back there taking your crap? I’m sorry that you think $2.97 is too much to pay for a gallon of diesel. I’m especially sorry that you repeated this godforsaken number so many times that, years from now, I will remember what diesel prices were at that particular gas station.
Arguing with her is not going to lower prices. All it’s going to do is make some kid cry and some sick woman beat you to death with a bag of mentholated goodness.
Thank you. “Asberger’s” drives me crazy, too. It was driving me crazy long before I became a step-mother to a young adult with Asperger’s syndrome. It especially irks me when I see it here on the SDMB. It’s not even just the self-diagnosers. I’m pretty sure I saw a person who works in the health-care field spell it with a B. Aaargh!
Hey, Ma? Believe it or not I DO know some things. I’ve been living on my own for, what, 15 years now? I’m also thrify, which I know you don’t buy for a second, but things change when you’re out on your own paying your own heating bills.
So when I seal your windows, don’t tell me I’m doing it wrong since it’s not the way Dad did it. Dad duct taped plastic sheeting up. I bought the 3M stuff and put it up correctly. I’ve been doing this to all of my windows every November for the past 15 years. I think I know what I’m doing. Now quit unplugging my blowdryer.
When I take down the puny metal door gap doohicky and put up a rubber bumper, noting I just did this at my house and it stopped the draft, please don’t tell me “Dad never did that. What IS that anyways?” I know he didn’t do that and that’s WHY you’ve had duct tape around your front door for the past month.
And lastly, not all caulk is the expando type you so enjoy. Seriously. You don’t use expando foam on cement cracks. No, I am not a concrete expert. Never claimed to be. But when you attempted to “fix” the cracked concrete at my house with that crap and it instead made it worse, I DID ask a concrete expert who suggested the caulk I am using.
And FWIW, I do know how to check the antifreeze in your truck. You do NOT need to pay someone $75 to hook it up and check everything if your only concern is the radiator. How do I know how to do the amazing feat of checking fluids? Dad taught me with my first car.
I do love the woman.
My shear pins aren’t in the place they belong. I know I have 4 shear pins. I’m not using the snow blower with half the auger not moving. Screw the snow.
Back, I realize that the pain I’ve been feeling for the last three days is only a preview of coming attractions once I cross the 40 threshold. I would like to point out, though, that I am a good decade away from that threshold and thus there is no reason for this preview. Also, when my friend is good enough to do chiropracty on me for free, the least you could do is actually pop before his hands go numb. Had you popped last night as we all hoped you would do, I would not be feeling this lovely pre-pop feeling up my spine all day long. Yes, there will be another free chiropracty session this afternoon and this time you will pop.
They have a “No Candy” aisle in the supermarket. When are they going to get a “No Old Ladies Taking A Half An Hour To Write A Check For $7.32” aisle?
You are nicer than I am. I would have forwarded it to the mayor myself, and to the local newspaper for good measure.
They got through the day without burning down anything, yay. I don’t know what kind of oil they used.
When I’ve seen videos of deep-fried turkey fires, it seems it’s generally a result of careless handling or the buckling of a very cheap stand like the one my neighbors were using.
There is in MY head now - “Assburger’s Syndrome.” Heh heh heh.
I just walked to the mall and back to buy myself a lovely sweater for a birthday present. Apparently walking on sidewalks and with walk lights in a crosswalk is a good way to get yourself killed around these parts. I hate other people.