That costs extra.
I too am nonplussed by the concept of going to a strip club with cheap beer and even noticing, much less being concerned by, the appearance of the bouncers.
I have observed that in some establishments, poundage seems to be the only requirement for a bouncer.
My friend’s band played at a bar that had a bouncer who was maybe 5’10" and close to 400 pounds. Now, I know that some incredibly strong guys can carry a lot of fat, this guy wasn’t like that: he looked soft. I got talking with him, and learned that he had suffered a heart attack a few years earlier (he looked to be in his mid-twenties :eek: ). He volunteered that he did need to lose some weight, "but first, I need to get a pacemaker put in".
Watching him walk, I pictured a t-shirt: "I’m not waddling, I’m slowly menacing".
What’s the mystery? One goes to a strip bar to ogle the dancers, of course. The ogling experience is marred when you have a fat fuck that looks like this (only with a shitty-looking goatee and backwards baseball cap) standing right in your field of view every fucking moment of the performance.
So … you’re drinking real cheap, and groping real cheap and it’s apparently a bit of a brain teaser for you why the management would be hiring two morbidly obese hambones instead of people they might actually have to pay some real money for.
Hmmm… let’s cogitate on that.
They’re all you can drink out there?! I haven’t gone out there since before I was 21. My over 21 roommates never mentioned all you can drink. Stupid painted hands always bothered me but its so much smarter than a wristband. My roommate just grabbed the car keys, I’ll be gone for the rest of the day.
The good looking bouncers work at the gay bars. Duh. The pay & tips are muuuuuuch better.
They’re paid?
In Purina Bouncer Chow, probably.
Hey, you never know. Maybe the club had some muscleheads before and they all turned out to have roid rage and one tossed some dude headfirst into the ice maker 'cause he had a green shirt on.
Nobody’s soft until you can take them.
COULD you take them?
Besides, what the hell are YOU going to do?
You’re not going to go toe-to-toe and get your ass kicked. You’re not even going to fight them on your terms, whatever “your” terms are, because whoever’s behind the bar will call the cops.
So what are you going to do? Beat feet out of there. Which is just what they want unruly patrons to do anyway.
Oh my GOODNESS- you mean those douchebags were DISRESPECTING WOMEN? Good thing you were there to point out their complete lack of chivalry and decorum. 
Look, I’m just as down for a little trading of exploitation as the next guy.
But I’m not so oblivious as to think there’s high ground of any kind to be gained in it.
You’re as fucking retarded as they were fat. The issue is the fat fucks being on display marring the view of the hot chicks. When the dancers left the stage, it took them right past our table. Instead of good up-close ogling of oiled stripper-flesh, we had the Obesity Boys in action.
You poor, poor man. Now, where’d I leave my itty-bitty violin?
Lol, no shit.
You’re getting to grope girls for little to no money and you are bitching about the bouncer? Be happy with what you’ve got, it sure isn’t that way everywhere.
Most clubs actually require a trip to the ATM before you enter, well, if you want to have fun. Or you can use the one inside if you want to pay a $10 charge. Or you can use your credit card if you want to pay the 20% on anything you spend.
Then there’s the $10 cover charge, with drinks no cheaper than $5.50 for the cheapest beer and averaging $7 or $8 for anything mixed. Then another $5 cover charge for the dance room where it is $25 per song. Or you can go by the hour ($450 for the champagne room). And of course, no matter which you choose you won’t be touching anything a bikini would cover. But depending on how much you spend, and which girl you pick, you may get a little grinding. The girls are friendly, but you’d most likely find them “overtly mercenary,” as they don’t spend time with anyone for free.
But that’s my club, and only representative of others like it where you don’t get a high mileage but you do get beautiful girls and a safe, fairly clean environment. It’s certainly not for everyone. 
If someone mentions “strip club” and “bouncers,” I immediately think they are describing the strippers.
Shouldn’t you be off googling answers for GQ?
Whose tits were bigger, the bouncers’ or the girls’? And were any of those girls “girls”?
On another note, your issue with the ugly bouncers is the same sort of thing that hampers my enjoyment of porn, and the reasoning may be similar to the situation in porn: they use ugly guys, so that the audience (mostly straight males, for the sort of stuff I like) doesn’t accidentally get turned on by a good-looking guy. For people like me, it really harshes my mellow. I don’t wanna watch hot girls get banged by ass-ugly dudes with upper arm tattoos of barbed wire/pseudo-tribal shit/feathers.
I think it would be cool if your titty bar had some badass shemale bouncers. Then they really wouldn’t distract too badly. Hell, they might even be able to teach you a thing or two.
Nope. I got nothing to do all day but sit around watching you throw a homoerotic hissy fit. Now that’s entertainment.
America truly is the land of milk and honey:
- Gas is cheap as dirt.
- Cars are cheap as dirt.
- Everyone makes more money.
- Food portions are huge.
- There are stripclubs where you can drink all the beer you want, AND fondle the strippers, for $10. I can’t fill my belly at Mcdonald’s around here for $10. :eek:
I guess you’re hoping that your use of the word “homoerotic” will somehow insult or irritate me. Better try something else. Dumbass.
I don’t know guys like that would necessarily be ineffectual as bouncers. There’s a lot to be said for sheer body mass. Anyway, a bouncer’s main job is to look so intimidating that nobody starts anything. A bouncer like the OP describes might not scare me the same way a hardbody would – he’d scare me in a different way; I’d do anything to avoid physical contact with him.