- Jamaica?
No, she went of her own accord.
I say I say I say, my wife went to Indonesia.
- Jakarta?
No, she went of her own accord.
I say I say I say, my wife was on holiday in Northern Italy.
- Genoa?
I’ll should say so, we’ve been married for ten years!
For years I was pronouncing that Led Zeppelin song wrong.
What Led Zeppelin song?
Anyway, anyone got any more of these atrocious vaudeville-style jokes? My brother and I have been concocting them all weekend.
Here’s another:
I’ve just been on a choral tour of Afghanistan.
- Jalalabad?
No, I sang quite well, actually.
I say I say I say, my wife’s just been to the zoo in Malaysia.
- Kuala Lumpur?
No, but she was decked by a kangaroo.
I say I say I say, my wife’s flying to Illinois today.
- Chicago?
No, business class.
Excellent! 
I say I say I say, I’ve just been looking at pornography in a smoky atmosphere.
- Jack off?
No, I took an expectorant.
- Expectorant?
No, I doubt anyone would have been too angry.
Hello, I’m Chet Peterson from down South.
- Mississippi?
No, MISTER C. P.
I say I say I say, what’s the state capital of Alaska?
- Juneau?
I wouldn’t be asking if I did, would I?
I say I say I say, I’m flying to the Middle East today.
- Dubai?
Oh, 2.30, but we’ll probably be delayed.
I say, I say, I say, I’ve just been in Finland, attending a conference on religious imagery in children’s literature.
- Helsinki?
Yes, and heaven floaty!