I want to fuck Ricki Lee Jones

I’m listening to Ricki Lee Jones and she just has the sexiest voice. It’s insane. Maybe I’m totally off-base here but there’s something about her voice that’s just very playful and sexy, like she’s just begging you to grab her and fuck her! It’s driving me crazy. How old is she now? She’s got to be in her fifties, but from recent pictures she still looks pretty good. She’s famous but not famous to the point of being totally inaccessible like Madonna or something. I bet if I saw her live in some small venue I could probably chat with her afterwards, if I was determined enough. That’s all I’d need - once I could get to talking to her, I could definitely seduce her, especially if my already insane confidence levels were even further boosted by a little J&B. I could definitely pull it off.

Is your name Chucky? Are you in love?

Better comb your hair

This photo was taken about 15 months ago.
I’d say closer to 60.

[edit]Wikipedia lists her DOB as November 8, 1954, making her 53.

That’s sort of a bad picture, I’ve seen others from around the same timeframe that don’t look as bad. Some people look worse when they’re smiling instead of better, because it wrinkles the face. In any case, I still want to fuck her, and Joni Mitchell also, regardless of her age.

I’m a big fan of Ricki Lee Jones and have been since she released her first album. That being said, I TIVO’d a live performance of hers on DirecTV’s special subscribers only channel. Great show. But she was much heavier than the linked picture above which made her look very frumpy – almost grandmotherly. Also, her speaking voice was very very very nasal.

I was sort of disillusioned.


E’s in love.

Kinda cute but a somewhat rough 53

OK that settles it…I’m fucking her.

Once upon a time I was a teenager who thought Rickie Lee Jones was the coolest chick on earth, and I had to meet her. A dozen red roses sent backstage before the show got me into her dressing room afterward. A cherished photo I have (autographed later by Rickie Lee) is of her smiling and resting her tired head on my shoulder.

If you ever achieve your goal, Argent, remember this: that odd taste when you kiss her is my dick.

Dear Penthouse,

I never thought it would happen to me, but they closed my thread on the Straight Dope! They told me that since it was just a thread devoted to telling the world how much I wanted to fuck Ricki Lee Jones, then it was better suited for LiveJournal or somewhere else. So, I chose you.

  • AT

P.S.: If Scumpup has already written in, don’t believe him. It’s a dirty, dirty lie.