Do you have any memorable instances of a time when someone either made a flippant remark or acted in a way in front of you that you would never have acted for fear of social retribution, but that you found rather bold and amusing? I’d like to hear about it.
When someone else acted saucily, but not me? Noooo, I am a saucy baggage from way back. A veritable bawd.
I had some rather wild party girls for neighbors in grad school. They thought it was funny to act out in front of the “Old guy” (I was 27). So they were rather racy to each other in front of me, talking about how they were gonna get some tonight or complaining about rug burns from all the fun they were having. And no, they weren’t hitting on me. I could hear what they said after I passed, as well.
I wonder what they’d have said if they knew the kind of kinky stuff I’m into. Because frankly, they were vanilla from head to toe.
I used to go out with a girl who used to lift up her shirt to flash her breasts as a replacement gesture for the more-pedestrian hand-wave.
See someone she recognized across the street? “Oi!” flash
A few years back a couple of friends from Den Haag that were visiting the States and I were walking through the local supermarket when one of them spotted string cheese. They had never heard of such a thing and couldn’t wait until we got home to try it, so they ripped open the package and started snacking on it. ( note: this was NOT shoplifting as they had every intention of paying and did pay for the package). The store manager came up and started yelling at us, saying we were stealing and it was unacceptable.
I was trying to think of what to say when they both started speaking to him in confused Dutch, he turned to me and I just babbled something that sounded Dutch to me and, apparently, to him. He tried the old trick of speaking English louder and slower, but we continued our feigned ignorance until he just shrugged his shoulders and walked away.
I thought it was great, I stil laugh about that day. And it encouraged me to learn another language so that I, too, could confuse would-be authority figures.
If we mean the insolent definition rather than racy…
I was highly amused when one of my coworkers, whom I’m pretty friendly with, lost it this summer, and said something to underlings that I’d love to but never would. This coworker is more laid-back that I am (I’m not “strict” by any means, but I tolerate a lot less chatter at my tables) but it was being abused by a couple of people he was supervising. While most people were doing their work, he complained a few times that they hadn’t done anything besides talking for half an hour.
Cut to:
“Hey, folks. Some people keep asking about future projects. Here’s an idea: how about you actually score a few of the ones you’re supposed to be working on now instead of talking incessantly?”
One of the two dolts in question came up to him and complained that he ought to have spoken to them privately rather than make a general announcement. Keep in mind that my friend used no names in the aforementioned comment. The reply? “Well, ___ I would have, but this is the third time. I figured after speaking to you twice this was a better way to get the point across.”
hehehe. What the dolt didn’t realize is that his supervisor and I are two of the only people who could get away with comments like that (though mine run more to being stressed by endless questions “Actually, I don’t know what your accuracy is at the moment. I’d have to have time to do some read-behinds to tell.”) because we’re inexplicably liked by higher ups so complaining is pointless… and it just made the other people at the table make fun of the dolt for being a whiner once he sat down again.