I want to stop drinking - tell me about detox

In My Humble Opinion
41

That’s the plan. Right now, I feel like getting sober is going to be the hard part. I made an appointment to see my doctor a week from Tuesday, and hopefully I can get into a facility somewhere around mid-April. (Not that I don’t want to do it sooner than later, but I need to wait until the start of the new fiscal year for my paid leave time to roll over.)

I mostly drink whiskey on the rocks, with some mixed drinks, beer, and hard cider taking up the balance. The possibility of seizures is definitely one of the things that’s telling me I need to stop now before I get worse.

From what I’ve read, those will most likely be part of the treatment regimen at whatever facility I end up going to.

42

I think the OP needs to get his prescriptions (if any) from a doctor. (How do you manage to just have these pills “on hand”?)

Good luck to Smapti!

43

My sister is two years younger than me, but she had a cocaine problem as well as being pretty much in the same boat as me, alcohol-wise. Difference is, she works for a government agency, and they don’t like employees with drug and alcohol problems.

To the poster who was puzzled about why drinkers drink, I will point you to my sister, who is psychologically the closest thing to myself on this planet. She got addicted to cocaine—couldn’t live without it—and although I do indeed like cocaine, I totally can live without it. It doesn’t bother me in the least to think I’ll never have cocaine again.

How is this possible that my sister would become so addicted and I wouldn’t? I partially understand where she’s coming from, because I like cocaine very much too, but I couldn’t understand why it had become a problem for her, since even in my worst imaginations I can’t conceive of being addicted to it. It just doesn’t do anything for mr that way.

Why some people can drink a few drinks and then go on their merry way and others can’t is a total mystery and of course the reasons are very complex. And it’s frustrating to think that I will never be able to have “just one drink,” but that’s the way it goes.

If a friend came over with some toot and I did a few lines, great. But if I didn’t have any i wouldn’t worry about it tomorrow (just FYI I wouldn’t do it again under any circumstances—too old!)

But my sister could not say the same.

But she went to an expensive rehab clinic and now goes to group meetings, where she encounters heroin addicts blah blah blah. She knows it’s not for me, but it seems to be working for her, and more power to her! Whatever gets YOU through the night—if it seems unnecessary and illogical to you to have to assign your trouble to A Higher Power, well, I totally agree.

A very good friend of mine since college found Jesus, and although I can barely talk to him now (too many “blessed this” and "blessed that"s) it got HIM off the sauce and whatever other drugs he was doing, and he seems to be very, very happy.

One thing that both my sister agree on is dealing with the boredom, but you have to realise that as alcoholics, we spent most of every single day thinking either about how to acquire alcohol, actually drinking the alcohol, and then dealing with the aftereffects of the alcohol—that takes up a substantial portion of EVERY DAY, and when that is suddenly gone, it can seem like a huge emptiness.

But just as you worked very hard over a long time to create all those rituals and obsessions, you must devote a lot of time and energy to replacing them with new rituals and obsessions. It is possible, it takes time but it works.

Nothing is easy when the brain is involved and very frequently, all you need is a substantial amount of time to undo what you have spent a substantial amount of time creating.

I can honestly say that as every day away from my last drink goes by, I am incrementally stronger and less obsessed with alcohol.

44

Oh, sorry. Of course he would need to get them from his doctor. I was taking Clonazepam for anxiety, so I had them “on hand.”

I was thinking that if he didn’t have a prescription for them or was having a problem getting to a doctor he might have a family member who was taking some benzos and might be able to spare some for emergencies.

He wouldn’t have to beat about the bush with his doctor, who would most probably prescribe them as a matter of course if the OP informed her that he was quitting drinking.

45

I have a pretty good idea of what I want to tell the doctor, and it’s pretty much the condensed version of what I said above - I’ve been drinking heavily for many years now, more so than I’ve been honest with her about in the past, that my intake has gone up considerably over the past two years, that I’ve come to the decision that I want to quit, and that I’ve discovered I can’t quit on my own because of the symptoms I start having if I try to cut back, and I think I need inpatient treatment to detox under medical supervision, and I’d appreciate if she could point me in the direction of a facility that can help me and advise me on what I can do before and after that treatment.

46

Just a question for the OP:

How do you not manage to smell like booze the next day at work? I have a habit of about a 1/3 of a fifth (what is that, a fifteenth? :p) a night, and I’m always paranoid that I smell. As a matter of fact, coworkers have twice before called me out on it. One particular cow-orker was able to identify the type of alcohol I was drinking.
I think that if I drank three times my normal amount (a full fifth), people around me would be actively noticing and noting. Anything like that every happen to you, Smapti?

47

It’s never come up. People have noticed once or twice if I was particularly hung over, but I always wear clean clothes to work every day, I put on deodorant, and nobody’s ever mentioned a smell of alcohol on me. Maybe the fact that it’s such a physical job (night stocking at a very very high-volume grocery store) and we’re all constantly sweating our butts off means it’s less noticeable.

48

I have a couple questions, though if you do not want to answer that is fine. The questions are so I can understand where you are coming from a bit better and also might (even if you don’t answer them on the board) provide some insight for yourself. The reason these might provide some insight is that this thread has mostly (when not devolving) covered the physical aspects of sobering up. As far as I can tell, the hard part is dealing with the mental side of things*.

#1. If a situation arises where you cannot drink in your normal way, how does that feel. For example, say there is an holiday party that you feel you need to attend but cannot drink while at the party. This party falls during your normal drinking time.

When I was drinking a situation like the above was almost a crisis. I’d basically be stressed out at the party until I could get to my drink.

#2. Does the idea of never drinking again scare you?

It scared the crap out of me.

#3. If you are out of booze and the liquor store is closing in 10 minutes, what do you feel?

When I was drinking, that was panic time.

#4. If you are drinking with another person around and there is one drink left and the take it, what do you feel?

I got pissed. That bastard took my drink!

#5. Someone in your life you care about mentions that you are drinking too much. How does that make you feel?

It pissed me off. Badly. Towards the end I knew they were right but it still pissed me off, see #2.

And something to keep in mind. When alcoholism comes up there is a lot of focus on how to stop drinking. It is the focus because it is the problem. However, the goal of recovery should be how to live a better and happy life, or as A.A. puts it, be happy, joyous and free. There is the method (A.A., therapy, etc) and a lot of arguments about the best one. But when these discussions happen we all too often focus on details and miss the big picture. I have tried in my posts on this board, though I am not sure how successful I am, to express just how much better my life is since I began my recovery.

I am living a life I never expected back when I was drinking. I married a wonderful woman. I have twin boys, almost 5 months old, who are just awesome. Holy Shit! I am a Dad. I have the love and respect of my family and friends. I have an awesome job. And more. I actually love my life, who’da thunk it?

I never thought I would have any of these things when I was drinking. Not a chance. And I wouldn’t have any of them if I kept on drinking.

Slee

  • Insert ‘Slee is mental’ joke here.
49

As a rule, I avoid drinking at parties, because I’m going to have to drive home and I don’t allow myself to drive drunk. The only time I’ve made an exception to this was to have a glass of champagne at my sister’s wedding a few years ago. I tend to stay sober until after I get home and then drink. Those tend to be the days I drink the heaviest.

I should mention at this point, since some of your other questions relate to it, that I work graveyard shift and my daily schedule is a little unorthodox because of it - in general, I wake up just before 10 PM, go to work at 11, get off work between 7 and 9 in the morning, and drink in the late morning/early afternoon before I go to bed around 2-3 PM. So if I’m going to a party or an event, it throws my whole routine off in the first place - I usually plan to take the evening of that event off of work so I can handle everything and be back on schedule and fit to work the following evening.

I think I’ll miss the taste more than the buzz, honestly. I started drinking later than most people (had my first sip at 25), and I can imagine myself living again like I lived before I started. It doesn’t exactly “scare” me to think that I might never drink again, but I’d be disappointed - more the feeling that I might never get to eat my favorite food again.

There were times when I wasn’t as financially well off as I was now and was living paycheck-to-paycheck, where my pay would direct-deposit into my bank account at about 1:45 AM on Friday morning, just before alcohol sales cut off at 2 AM. That’s the only time I really felt “panic mode” about not being able to get alcohol. These days I’m doing well enough for myself that I’ve been able to keep enough on hand.

In general, I drink alone, at home, in front of my computer, so this hasn’t come up for me.

It would really make me feel bad, and that’s something I’m going to have to deal with soon.

Right now, nobody in my family even knows I drink at all. I didn’t start drinking until I lived on my own and I don’t drink around them (except the above-mentioned champagne at my sister’s wedding, which everyone was completely surprised by). Mostly, that’s because of shame - my sister and both my parents have had addiction problems with alcohol and with other drugs (which I’ve thankfully managed to steer far clear from), and I always prided myself on staying straight and narrow when I was younger - I didn’t want them to know I ended up going down the same road. In retrospect, it was stupid of me, knowing that there’s a genetic aspect to addiction, to think that I could avoid their mistakes through sheer force of will.

I’m going to have to open up to my mother before I go into treatment, because she’s the only person I trust to babysit my cat while I’m away and I’m going to have to tell her where I’m going and why. She went through what I can only assume was a worse struggle than the one I’m facing when she ended her meth addiction 15 years ago, so I know she’ll understand where I’m coming from and be supportive, but honestly it’s having to tell her that I’ve been lying for so long that scares me more than how she’ll react to the revelation.

Good for you. :slight_smile: I don’t know where I’ll be five or ten years from now if I can get sober or stay sober, but I’m sure it’s a better place than where I’ll end up if I keep on the path I’ve been on.

50

Okay, here’s my experience. Good for you to be willing to go the inpatient route, since there are medical professionals who will toss a bottle of Librium at you and say “Good luck.”

I did inpatient detox for a week. I was given Librium, nutritional therapy (since years of hard drinking can take a toll on your vitamin levels), and a mild sedative for sleep (similar to Benadryl).

After the first day or two I was expected to attend groups and informational sessions about recovery. They were not AA meetings, but some of the exercises were clearly inspired by AA.

I was evaluated physically at the end of the week and my counselor recommended a month inpatient rehab., which I did. This was followed by 6 weeks of outpatient rehab.

I’ve been continuously sober for 7 years.

I don’t know if it’s typical, but the physical part of the detox was pretty easy for me, after the first night. In fact, in a few days, I was already feeling better physically than I had in years. This was not the case for people around me who were detoxing from other substances.

51

I got sober 26 years ago. I hang out at parties and bars with no problem. I live with an alcoholic. The key to my sobriety was the changes I made to my life. I had to get real honest with myself and do the footwork. There was a period of a few years where I allowed myself to have a social drink or a glass of wine with dinner on a date but I honestly lost all desire for alcohol. I don’t like how it makes me feel inside or out. My entire life has gotten better beyond belief.

I started playing around a little with pot a few years ago and the same thing happened, I just like sobriety better. I can live withmyself now. Anything that takes me out of my normal state is no longer desirable.

52

I never would have pegged you for an alcoholic, Smapti. You seem to have a very well-ordered mind, despite the opinions of the Great Debates regulars.

Question about your withdrawal experience: did you feel like you were in a waking dream state? As in you can’t really sleep because you’re having very vivid dreams every time you close your eyes. I ask because I get that way if I forget to take my antidepressants, which chemically repair inert nerve endings in my brain. Maybe alcohol provides a similar effect for you. Have you considered you might have Depression?

53

Alcohol screws up sleep patterns all by itself–no depression needed. And vivid dreaming (including nightmares) is a side effect of sobering up. I actually welcomed it–even with the dreams it was more refreshing and normal than the “dead” sleep I had when I was drinking.

If you go in for alcohol treatment, they can evaluate you for other issues, too.

54

This would be a co-occurring disoder, something that the docs at the inpatient facility could/should diagnose. The only hope is that they don’t diagnose it simply to extend the patient’s stay, but hopefully they are a legit facility with the patient in mind and don’t do this.

You are correct. Crazy-ass dreams are a super common withdrawal symptom They will go away in time

55

Is there a reason simply tapering off gradually would be a bad idea? I’d like to know why medically-supervised detox is being recommended as a first-line solution when I (fortunately having never experienced alcohol addiction firsthand) would consider it a last resort. Is it a willpower issue?

56

Smapti, I hope you find good advice and good assistance. I wish you success.

Have you not read this thread? From people who have experience, it seems that doing it unsupervised brings a significant risk of failure or death.

And are you serious about the willpower bit? If all you need is willpower then what does the concept of “addiction” mean to you?

57

I only skimmed the thread, but you(Smapti) should go to a clinic and detox under supervision. Do not try to do it alone, as that could prove to be fatal. The symptoms you described in your OP are very serious.

When you’re ready, try to find a safer crutch, like jasmin tea or AA.

58

I note that Smapti is working nights. Could that be relevant? Might switching to working days help?

59

Yes, basically. It’s hard to taper off a substance that reduces your “willpower” as soon as you ingest it. Also, as I mentioned, years of hard drinking do more to your body than get you addicted to alcohol. Medical supervision can treat nutritional issues, anxiety and other side effects.

60

I’m not planning to significantly change my habits until after I’ve talked to my doctor, and I’m not going to try and quit until I’m ready to check into a facility.

A few of you have PMed me mentioning specific facilities in my part of the country. Thank you - I’ll take them into consideration along with whatever my doctor may recommend.