This pretty much sums up my feelings and trepidation regarding this process. Sorry I copied and pasted from another board, but I haven’t the heart to rewrite it all, and I’m not sure I could. I mashed two separate posts together. Pray, celebrate Festivus, whatever ya gotta do, but send some vibes my way. I want to quit this evil menace.
going into alcohol detox tomorrow. Will be out for at least three days. I need to do this in order to spare my poor liver and my life, as well as to improve my relationships with my family.
I am a functional boozer, I never miss work, I spend time with my family, Cub Scouts, soccer, bowling leagues, you name it, I am there. And I don’t drink before or during any of these things, and I don’t drink and drive (well, I did after the Bears game Sunday, but I took it pretty easy!). My problem is once it’s nighttime and I feel “my chores are done”, I wrap myself in a cocoon of beer and my own selfish ways and desires and therefore remove myself as a presence from my family and reality.
So, recognizing that I have a problem, my doctor has suggested a medical detox with aftercare followup as the best solution, as he says that I have been drinking so much (approx 10 beers a night) for so long (over 20 years) that my withdrawal symptoms could actually kill me. Yikes. So I am going in tomorrow, and will be out of the loop.
I know that many of you will miss my extremely valuable input, and that your lives will feel emptier for my absence, but I’ll be back…faster…stronger…bigger…I can be rebuilt!
The bye week comes at a GREAT time for me.
Salutations and I’ll see you on the other side!
I know we’ve covered this ground before, and thanks to all the well-wishers. But this time I have realized that this isn’t something I can just do on my own. I think realizing that was a good first step. I need to get this infernal drug out of my body for a few days, and then tackle the afterglow. And I’ll need professionals in order to do that.
I’m scared. I haven’t been without my precious for well nigh over twenty years. I know what I need to do, but will I do it?
I need to rid myself of this soul scourge and get myself back on level ground, where I remember late night conversations and commitments, don’t draw up like a turtle in it’s shell after 9:00pm and just generally be more motivated and less fatigued. That’s another thing that’s been worrying me. I don’t get hungover anymore. I just get so tired for long stretches of the workday. And its because I don’t sleep well because of John Barleycorn, the irony being of course that I can’t sleep without his evil hand caressing my heart either.
Anyway, that’s my sordid tale and I’m sticking to it. I also fear being far less snarky and witty when I’m sober. I may end up blending into the crowd, which is my worst fear of all.*