First, I think it’s absolutely crucial that this case be documented so that further decisions can be made in this man’s care which are protective not only for him but also for the general public. Perhaps an effort could be made to locate his place of residence and make the report to a supervisor there.
There is a catch-22 with involving the police. And that is that AngelSoft’s father “slammed him to the ground.” Under the circumstances it’s a normal response. But under the vulnerable adult act it may have resulted in the police taking action against her father and the person with the problem would have simply been returned to his residence. It’s unlikely that his caregivers will mention it for fear of consequences. Sounds like one was supposed to be mentoring the other one.
Pretty bizarre and accidental result of legislation but I know of cases where it has happened.
In one case a habitual DD drugged and molested a teen-aged boy who retaliated. The boy spent time in court and prison for beating a man in a wheelchair and the habitual offender was simply sent back to the state hospital since he didn’t appear ready to be living independently. Again.
The scope is so much larger than mentioned here. A few years ago I saw severely disabled people being escorted around the State Fair by teen-agers. There is no way their issues could have been being attended to on a hot, humid day. Most were immobile so no apparent danger to the public, but I didn’t know if they were being diapered (sometimes forbidden by law by anyone but certified staff) or being given sufficient liquids. The teens were having a free day at the Fair. Yikes.
These situations are incredibly complicated by legislation made by people with good hearts but little understanding. And there’s always the question of how much the public is willing to spend on well-trained, well-paid staff.
I wouldn’t have involved the police because many police departments have had little training in dealing with these kinds of things and treat everything as criminal behavior. (And, of course, it is, if it happens outside of a therapeutic setting.)
I had all the answers once upon a time and now? You put your money down on your best informed choice and you take your chances.
Sounds like everyone involved was trying to make the best of a very bad situation.
AngelSoft, I’m glad you are okay.
In any event, it is very easy to “Monday morning quarterback” when it isn’t you who is shaken up and covered with popcorn. Whether calling the cops or not was the best possible decision is irrelevant (personally, I think I’d have done as you have); at least how you guys handled it was a reasonable way to handle it, so ya did good.
I think the important documentation will be for the man’s caretakers to report it to his doctor/official caretakers. They are the ones who need to know. As I’ve worked, just a little, with mentally disabled folk and youth, I probably would have had a conversation with the girl and guy there, just to see what the situation was. But I’m nosy and interested that way.
Glad you handled it well, TP, hope your mom doesn’t become overly concerned about it later.
I can understand *why *the OP didn’t want to call the cops; no one wants the effects of an attack to linger, they’re embarrassing at least and disturbing at most, keeping you from going about what you were doing. That’s why so many people don’t press charges even when cops ARE called. It is not the easy thing to do. At 18 I was verbally and physically attacked but too intimidated by the process to go through w/ pressing charges; I later saw the news that my attacker had been hit by a car and killed not long after.
I could not care less whether the attacker was a vulnerable person due to mental issues or not; they were in a situation where they were expected by those around them to behave in a legal manner. If those around them cannot be guaranteed the safety of their person then there are other ways for the person to see a movie, even at that theater and showing. Calling ahead for special seating or attention would have probably mitigated this entire thing and not inconvenienced anyone not already inconvenienced by working there.
I advocate keeping people who attack others away from others they can attack, regardless of how their synapses are firing.
I got robbed AND raped once at the movie theater. His name was Jar Jar Binks. I doubt I’ll ever recover
But seriously, glad the OP is okay. And yeah, its a moral struggle to report or not report. Don’t report, because, hey nobody is perfect. But what happens when you don’t and the next time bad shit goes down on other innocent people that would NOT have happened had you reported.
I experienced the same issue a few months back regarding some neighborhood dog attacks.
Angelsoft chose to respond to an unexpected act of violence with kindness, grace, and mercy. I can find no fault in that. If someone else would have handled it differently, I’d have supported him/her, too. It’s 100% the victim’s call to make.
Glad you’re okay, Angelsoft.
I’m also grateful that I don’t have to care for a mentally challenged person. I have a good friend who shares caring for a schizophrenic brother with his mother. Very few of us have any idea what a huge, thankless burden that is. It is a 24/7 job and neither can ever take a break, because they are good people, and won’t abandon their family member, even though his brain is broken. I’m sure that they would have been very, very grateful to be shown the same kindness that Angelsoft showed.
I’m glad you are OK, Angelsoft. That must have been so upsetting. I don’t know that I would have been able to enjoy the movie if that had happened to me.
I think you did the right thing and the kind thing by not escalating the incident and calling the police. It doesn’t sound like there was any particular reason the caregiver should have expected her charge to attack, and now she knows and can take preventive measures to make sure there is no next time. I’m glad you’re okay, because that must have been scary.
One more thing that comes to mind. The minders should have documentation that they are minders employed in an official capacity. At least my daughter’s therapy assistants all carry documentation specifically if there is any kind of incident (for example a medical emergency).
Whether or not such documentation was on hand would probably influence me on the reporting to the police.
It was the right thing to do and you should have made the call. The individual was a public safety hazard, not to mention the fact that he had just assaulted you.
Wow! Tough situation. Can’t fault AS for how you handled it.
I agree, tho, that depending on the shirt/glasses - some restitution would have been appropriate. It really must be difficult for people who have to care for differently abled family members - but I still should be able to go to a movie without having myself and my belongings damaged.
My concern is what would have happened if it had happened to me and I had fought back. I did quite a bit of martial arts for quite a while, but have never been in a fight as an adult. If someone attacked me in the manner described, I could imagine hurting them as I defended myself. Would totally suck to just be going to a movie, and end up defending myself in court.
And I generally would lean against involving the cops if at all possible. Apologies to all of the fine LEOs out there, but I could well imagine the hassle of dealing with the justice system being far more costly than any of my shirts. I guess I’m just selfish, but in this situation I’m not sure I’d be eager to subject myself to much if any dealings with law enforcement to potentially protect society at large. I can imagine preferring that the theater handle that aspect without my involvement, if at all possible.
I love how everyone in MPSIMS is an expert on psychiatry, dating and everything else. “It will happen again unless you call the cops!” Really? Do you know anything about this guy? No. Shut up. It could very well have been the first time.
OP, I’m glad you didn’t suffer any permanent ill effects. How was the movie?
Is there a term for the rule that every discussion of a real-life situation on the Dope ends with the consensus being that the most serious possible action on the part of the OP is the right one?
Like with relationship threads: generally, the consensus will be - leave the bum.
