No matter how stupid this guy is, I would be worried about his writing the checks to himself. Does he think he will be moved out before you find out? Is there any possibility that he could become violent towards you?
Yep. Classic passive-aggressive.
I had (operative word) a secretary who forged company checks. She was the only one who knew where the check stock was, who knew how to use/position them in the check protector etc. She took and forged one check over a holdiay weekend, came back in afterward as if nothing had happened. I hadn’t gotten the statement yet, and she went ahead and did it two more times, even attempting a fourth time w/her co-conspirator, and even showed up back to work after the fourth attempt was unsuccessful.
I signed the statement that the signature was (poorly) forged, and my company never lost a dime of it, despite it being thousands of dollars.
I admit I can only go by what the OP tells us about Dave, and based on that, I’m not sure that Dave is energetic enough to be any kind of aggressive. Neutron may not even be a person to Dave, just an occasional source of funds for whatever momentary indulgence Dave feels like pursuing. Padlock on the door? Huh. Like, I’ll have to look somewhere else for money for smokes and… hey, Family Guy is on. Cool.
If neutron laces into him, Dave will nod and say whatever he must to make this buzzing annoyance fade into the background again, all without getting too worked up about it, of course, because that takes energy, man. That might qualify as passive-aggressive, I guess, but to me it’s more like ignoring a commercial while waiting for the program to come back.
Or so’s my impression, of course. I could be completely wrong about Dave and simply projecting onto him the behaviours I’ve noticed among my own acquaintances.
My initial response on reading the OP was, “There isn’t just one really stupid guy living in that house.” Seriously, neutron star, are you a teenager or something that you don’t know enough to get the hell out of a bad situation when you find out it’s bad (i.e. when he did the first unbelievably over-the-line thing, or got arrested, or whatever)? I know we’re really down on blame-the-victim here, but dude, did you think he was going to get BETTER as a roommate after you found out he was jacking off to web porn in your room? After he got felon charges laid? What were you waiting for, him to steal your cheques and do some serious damage? Oh, wait…
Look, I feel somewhat badly that he screwed you over like that, but you have to know that you played your own role in it.
No, but even if I did, he’s so bad with computers that I could have a file called MY_BANK_ACCOUNT_INFO.txt on the desktop and he wouldn’t be able to figure it out.
Yeah, I went over to his place after I left the police station on Saturday to try to simmer down. Took longer than I thought; I ended up staying past midnight. He’s not entirely surprised, as he had a suspicion that Dave might try to cause some damage to his house before he moved out and asked me to keep an eye out. I never considered the possibility that he’d try to screw me over and neither did my friend. With all of my belongings in my room and my room locked, I thought I was safe.
That’s pretty much it. He doesn’t care much about attention. He likes his drinks and drugs, and if the rent doesn’t get paid, that’s cool as long as he has enough money to go to the bar. Seems to have a sense of entitlement, too. He deserves all these things and if somebody gets fucked in his pursuit of them, well, that’s just incidental.
Near as I can figure, if he’s thinking anything at all, it’s that I make more money than I actually do, and that he can get away with that much without me noticing.
I don’t see him becoming violent. I mean, I’ve been wrong about him before, but it just doesn’t seem like something he’d do. Revenge doesn’t net him anything tangible. I also kind of doubt that anyone would bail him out of jail to give him the opportunity, especially if the girlfriend goes down with him.
Speaking of the girlfriend, she didn’t show up this morning - or if she did, it was so brief that I missed her. My room doesn’t face the street, so if she just came by and picked him up, I wouldn’t have seen it.
Nope, that’s pretty damn close, actually.
The situation is a little more complex than that, but, you know, don’t let that stop you from calling me a moron!
Keep checking for those missing checks to show up. Make sure none are to a gun/pawn shop.
I dunno. Seems to me he acted fairly appropriately with escalating sanctions for bad behaviour - soon to end with this guy’s arrest.
Looking back on it, I’m not sure I’d have done any differently. What exactly was he supposed to do? Move out himself if he had fears for his safety, I suppose.
I have a memory as well.
Perhaps I should be warned for this.
What I’m wondering is… Okay, roommate is arrested, held, appears before a judge…and won’t he then likely be released? Because as hurtful as it is to you, stealing $700 is not large on the scale of the crimes courts deal with, and there seems to be a chronic shortage of jail cells so they don’t want to ‘waste’ them on minor offenders, especially for non-violent stuff.
Anyway, are you like to end up with roommate strollingback in a day or later? Can you possibly live there with him back in the apartment? Especially since he will have to know that you were the one who called the cops on him. :eek:
That’s where your handy dandy restraining order comes in. He comes strolling back in, he goes back before the judge. He goes back to cellblock C.
Well, yeah. Let me be clear: I have the utmost sympathy for neutron star here (my best friend has been in a very similar situation, and I know how wrenching it is), and I very much look forward to hearing how the arrest goes. But I do have to think that if I were living with a felon with a meth habit who I knew was indulging in minor theft and masturbation in my own bed … well, I wouldn’t be living with said felon for longer than it took to find a new room.
Obviously we don’t know all the details, but I certainly hope that neutron star doesn’t put up with any such roommates in future - or at least not so long that he’s defrauded out of the best part of a grand. I very much realise that when you’re close to these situations it’s often difficult to see what’s coming, but if you’re having to padlock your own flatmate out of your room, then you’ve no longer got any personal security, just an illusion. This, for me, would be the signal to get the hell out of Dodge.
I also agree with StarvingButStrong’s concerns; it seems like as long as this idiot nominally lives in your house, you’re vulnerable; does your friend whose flat it is know about what’s going to happen, and has he planned for it?
A co-worker just told me about this forum, I had something like this happen years ago. The big problem was that after getting out of jail, he came back. I’d changed the locks. He called cops. Cops asked if he lived there and paid rent. I had to admit “yes”, but tried to explain. No avail. Law where I lived said he had a right to enter and continue to reside there since he had proven (and I admitted) that he lived there, slept there and kept his belongings there.
I had to move out. He stole a bunch more shit from me during the move. Cops did fuckall.
The laws on this will vary from state to state and sometimes city to city, but it’s a good warning. While the guy’s in jail, you should make sure the guy who owns the house, from whom you’re renting, formalizes the guy’s eviction, so this can’t happen. It may not be an issue in your location, but then again, it might be. Definitely look into it.
Oh god are you nerds actually warning people about dosing? Letter of the law people are so exhausting. Not too long ago I dosed by boyfriend’s applesauce with ambien when he had food poisoning because I just couldn’t listen to it anymore. It was also out of mercy.
How cute. You’re lucky he didn’t have a drug reaction/interaction that hurt or killed him.
quack quack quack. he takes ambien all the time.
I think I understand now. Thanks for the patient explanation.
Couldn’t listen to what?
Crimeny, my heart fucking bleeds. *He *has food poisoning and you’re put out by it? He has my sympathies.
Giving someone drugs without their consent and knowledge is despicable behavior. As you pass into adulthood you will come to realize this. Meanwhile, try at least to pretend that you possess a little empathy. It may develop into a habit.