I need a gift for my best man, who is also my older brother.
Are these kinds of gifts supposed to be ones you receive and then never use? Or is it acceptable to give him something with ultility?
I personally was thinking of getting him a nice leatherman tool with best man engraved on it or something like that? I figure this would be a long-lasting gift (if it doesn’t get lost) that he could use frequently and be reminded of how much I appreciate everything he has done for me. I am unsure whether this would be an appropriate gift for the occasion. Any thoughts? What have you given/received or seen given as this kind of gift?
FWIW, the wedding is not going to be “traditional” in the sense that we didn’t read “Ms. Manner’s Guide to Etiquette” before planning.
ETA: There are no groomsmen in this wedding, if that matters.
The leatherman sounds like a cool present if he’s the sort to carry & use it. Another option that is always received well is a gift card to Best Buy or other store where the recipient can “treat” themselves to something fun. Our groomsmen also received Bacon Salt.
Don’t give any useless ceremonial doohickey. That’s just a waste.
Thanks for the positive response. Having never been married, or involved in a wedding before I wasn’t sure if it would be appropriate but apparently it would be. I like the idea of having his initials on it. I guess I don’t need to have best man on it, because he’ll already know why he has it!
Good idea, but not just engraved. Have the engraving on a shiny brass plate attached to it, with a couple of rhinestones on it (nothing better, if he tends to lose tools). Something real shiny, so every time a buddy sees him working with it they will ask about it, and he can boast about the neat bestman present his brother gave him. Pleasure for years!
We got our best men (two of them) functional gifts. One got a set of ceramic poker chips, and the other got a Garmin Forerunner. Both were suited to their interests, obviously, and AFAIK both got a lot of use.
Giving someone something they will enjoy and that you can afford is always appropriate, no matter the occasion. Something the recipient will not use or enjoy, or that you can’t afford is never appropriate, no matter how traditional the item may be. That’s why I hate it when couples try to come up with some sort of one-size-fits-all gift for attendants–in trying to find something nobody will hate, they wind up with something nobody particularly likes, either. Good on you for thinking of your brother as an actual person you like and want to make happy, and not one more goddamn thing etiquette requires you to buy.
A leatherman (or other knife) would actually be a very appropriate gift, as one of the origins of the “best man” was to defend the groom and/or bride from kidnapping.
I have given (and received) small boxed sets of steak knives. I gave out Laguiole (french style) knives with the Napoleon I bee symbol on them.
I also received a set of Wustof steak knives in a metal case. I bring them out when having guests over and always get comments on them.
A Leatherman is far more useful in many more situations.
I’ve frequently given out Leathermans*. The only person who wasn’t struck by the awesomeness of this gift was my husband, who probably WOULD prefer an Uzi. Everyone else expressed great joy in getting a multitool. My father in particular was overcome with gratitude, but he is a gadget addict. I usually get a sheath to go with it, too.
Oh, and many women appreciate the gift of a multitool, too. It’s something that’s not a traditional female gift, and women just don’t think of buying one for themselves, but once a woman has been in a situation that calls for a multitool, she really appreciates having one.
*I have nothing against Gerber, it’s just that I got started on Leatherman, and it’s habit by now.
