If I married a conjoined twin ...

Factual Questions
1

Inspired by mangeorge’s query.

The setting: I’m at a friend’s wedding. A hottie sitting on the other side of the aisle from me catches my eye and straight away I feel Cupid’s arrow slashing though my left ventricle. It’s hopeless, I must have her. On our first date we fall madly in love with each other and decide we simply must marry. As we kiss our goodnights, I mention that I couldn’t help noticing that she has a conjoined twin. The twin says she doesn’t mind as she finds me not at all unattractive, and that she and her sister are used to sharing certain intimacies as a matter of course.

To avoid confusion, let’s say that they’re joined at the … oh … I dunno, something that makes seperation a non-option. Maybe some brains or something.

So I marry the left-hand gal. The right hand gal participates patiently at the alter as society respects the individuality of the situation and her sister gets married, she always the bridesmaid.

Well, now I can file a joint tax return, but I have an extra person in my household who is a dependent. How do I handle that? Do I count right hand girl as a child-status dependent?

Also, am I seriously expected to not, you know, giver her her share of lovin? What if she has a kid, is it a bastard?

Have I really only one wife? Because man, if right hand sister is available for marriage then that means I’m likely to have to share my bed with another dude. and that would be a lot to ask of me and my left hand gal.

Would that then be a sin then, father?

2

Chang and Eng, the married siamese twins.

3

I know that, but it’s not really the same thing 'cause there’s two dudes and two chicks involved.

4

Join a colony of polygamists and marry them both.

5

I’m not sure why it’s not the same thing, but no, you wouldn’t have sex with the woman you aren’t married to. Why is it not the same thing?

6

Oh, yes you would!

7

Hey! They’re not joined at the brain. :smack: I do wonder how they’re going to sort all that out.

8

It’s been years, but I read a short story about a female with two heads, each with a distinct personality-one attended college and obtained her MBA, and the other was kind of a punk chick, yet they shared the rest of an otherwise normal female body. The story explored the working out of details when intimacy with a guy became part of the picture. Sorry, I don’t have a clue about author or story name.

9

:stuck_out_tongue:

10

It’s exactly the same thing, because each sister has the same issue as in your OP.

Which they solved by assuming the obvious. The twin is another separate human being and needs to be treated as such.

You’re creating a fantasy image. When you have to deal with a living, breathing human being it all changes.

11

Substitute ‘sister’, for ‘conjoined twin’ in your OP and the answers are pretty clear.

I don’t think you need to worry though. No woman with a conjoined twin would marry a man who does not understand that they are two different people. :dubious:

12

Of course, the answers to these questions are pretty easy assuming standard conjoined twins, it’s just the same as if you married one of a set of identical twins, except the other twin is for some reason handcuffed to the first twin.

Except, what about the case where the twins share the same reproductive organs? Sure, they’ve got two brains, that makes them two people. But if they share reproductive organs, you can’t have sex with one without also having sex with the other.

13

Ala Abligail and Brittney Hansel. Of course if they share the same womb and get pregnant are they then both the mother? Does it matter which ovary the egg came from (and is it even possible to tell)?

14

They have one reproductive system. Though there are two ovaries, I don’t think each of them controls her own ovary. They’d both be the child’s mother, equally.

15

The real question is: When will you be releasing the DVD of your wedding night? And will it be available in HD-DVD or Blu-Ray formats?

16

I didn’t see anything in the OP that implied that he did not understand that they are two different people. In fact, the entire premise of the OP is that “Hey, they’re different people, how can this be accommodated?”

It’s not often that one has to develop a sense of deep intimacy with two people at once. Time period, culture, gender, sex, sexual orientation and degree of conjoinedness (is that a word?) are all incredibly relevant. I’m sure every real time this occurs it is handled differently and uniquely, but I can’t even fathom a “for instance” explanation of how certain details are worked out practically and psychologically.

So I’d like to add the following questions to the OP:

EDIT: ** I UNDERSTAND THAT THERE’S NOT THAT MANY CASES SO ALL THE QUESTIONS BELOW ARE SPECULATIVE AND HYPOTHETICAL, BUT CAN NONE-THE-LESS HAVE A FACTUAL ANSWER BY OFFERING A FEASIBLE, IF NOT REAL, SCENARIO**

a) Physiologically speaking, for conjoined twins sharing one set of genitalia, how is the sensory aspect of it usually wired (or if there’s no usually, what are the recorded possibilities)? Are orgasms shared? Equally?

b) Physiologically speaking, for conjoined twins that each have their own set of genitalia, but shared circulatory systems, is there sensory and arousal cross-talk between the two individuals?

c) Legally, is there a precedent of establishing consent from two individuals for something that is usually defined as requiring consent from one (i.e. medical procedures, sex, etc.)?

d) Legally, in case of a shared and functional reproductive system that was used for its intended purpose (Either sex) would it be possible to list three individuals as parents on a US birth certificate? Is there precedent?

e) Legally, are there precedents for conjoined twins committing crimes where the question of establishing the guilty party and then somehow punishing them for it?

f) Psychologically and practically, in the case of shared genitalia, how many simultaneous partners or spouses would the pair of twins tend to want to have? Legally, if the twins share a uterus but each has a different husband, do automatic paternity laws completely fall apart or is there a reasonable default?

g) Psychologically, in the case of shared genitalia, but differing sexual orientation, how would things get handled? Celibacy? Mutual agreement of bisexuality?

h) Physiologically, in cases of shared or connected circulatory system but separate heads, are there known medical methods to sedate one of the twins without sedating the other? (something that doesn’t cross the blood brain barrier back into the blood injected directly into the cerebrospinal fluid?)

17

The simple answer is that the institution of marriage was never concieved as needing to address these issues - you’re asking where’s the grey paint in a store that only sells black or white

18

But this is an issue the institution of marriage will be forced to address if it ever comes up. So given just white and black paint, how do you make grey? Dithering? Mixing? :slight_smile:

19

Squinting and pretending it’s one or the other, I suspect.

20

The Hansel twins are breaking new ground in many ways. Most conjoined twins are either separated, or do not survive long enough to have these issues. The question has been raised about college admissions-what if one twin is admitted and the other isn’t. It seems unfair to have to take classes you hate just because your sister wants to.

In high school, they took the same classes but were tested separately. They each had to pass a driving test and they have separate licences. It’s fasscinating to me to watch how they deal with all the issues as they get older.