Last month or so I have been going through a lot of dusty old books and papers, including shredding old invoices etc going back 20 years.
A search on the Internet tells me that paper mites don’t exist.
However, I feel itchy. And the more I think how itchy I am, naturally you start to itch in other spots.
So what causes all the itching? Is it psychosomatic? I know the damn silverfish are real enough.
The dryness of the paper is an irritant.
How good a shape are the papers in? Some folks react to mold and mildew, and old books and papers can harbor both.
Thanks Even Sven and Elfkin.
Papers are pretty crappy as in dusty, but not moldy or any mildew. (Very dry climate here).
There’s dust, and then there’s paper dust, and there’s also paper fibers that are likely flying around from the shredding. I can see that making you itchy. It would make me itchy!
Dust mites are real.
book worms eat paper mites.
Sounds like a textbook case of Morgellon’s.
Until the OP shows us a matchbox of fibers that he pulled out of his skin, no it doesn’t.
I’d never heard of Morgellon’s until now. I think I would prefer gout.
And no fibres or anything. I can shower, change into fresh clothes and still feel itchy.
If thinking about being itchy, and what creatures might be causing it makes the itching worse, there is a psychological component.
Any contact-based reaction will resolve with removal of the offending antigen, so avoid exposure for a while and see what happens to the itching. Sure; maybe you picked up scabies somewhere. But more likely something not alive is irritating your skin.
You have to be really nutty to have Morgellons, but we’re all a little nutty when it comes to worrying that small somethings are going on with our skin. Except me.
Show me a medical text that includes a fiber requirement for a diagnosis of Morgellon’s. 
So, you’re shredding invoices going back TWENTY YEARS??
I think the itching is the least of your problems. 
I didn’t say they were MY invoices.
(And I would add I have also royally rooted one shredder and had to buy another).
Time for a bonfire then!
Damn you! Now I’m itchy.
Also another vote for bonfire.
Show me a medical text that gives a diagnosis of Morgellon’s. Most MDs think it’s a manifestation of delusional parasitosis. But here, matchbox sign.
Bonfires not allowed. No back yard incinerators in the suburbs.
However, I had a lot to do today and forgot to be itchy.
I hope you readers aren’t thinking about itching either.
Yes, this was the joke. Either you didn’t get it or your sense of humor is drier than mine!
You great wuss you. Bugger the local council by-laws…you’re just having a BBQ if questioned!
(Seriously, for all that weird shit that needs to be disposed of, find thee a tub out of an old top-loader washing machine, get a grate for the top, stick the stick bit at the bottom in the ground, bung yer’ flammable rubbish inside, and some chops on the grate/grill).
Win-win! 