Al Goldstein, the notorious publisher of Screw magazine, bought a Rolls-Royce and wrote an amusing article about what a massive pain in the ass it was to own. It constantly broke down, and whenever it did, the people at the Rolls dealership would explain that their cars were extremely delicate and some tiny foreign particle must have found its way into the engine. According to Goldstein, the joke among Rolls owners was that you also needed a “Rolls Repair Kit”—a truck full of money that would follow you wherever you went.
I wish I could find a copy of that article; it was hilarious. IIRC, it was in a mainstream magazine (not Screw).
To return to the OP’s question … I’d accept the car, put it into storage for the required length of time, then sell it.
I would paint it more or less like that, park it in front of my appartment, drive it every now and then a bit and let it slowly rust until TÜV would separate us for good. Whatever the contractual agreement concerning the “not selling” was, TÜV saying the car may not be driven takes precedent. This is Germany, car’s inspections are taken seriously here.
I haven’t followed Rolls design changes in detail but I was surprised to read that, as I always considered them to have turned unfathomably ugly sometime in the 2000s. But I checked out some pics, and by golly, you’re right. In the 1970s they still had their traditional classic elegance. In the 1980s they turned into boxes, not just the shape of the car but many of the design details. For instance the elegant partial ovals around the headlights in the 70s generation turned into fugly rectangular boxes in the 80s. Interestingly, that same 70s headlight design returned briefly in the 90s, at least for some models like the Corniche IV.
But for real ugliness check out the newer ones, like this 2005 Phantom:
Honestly, the front end looks like some industrial vehicle, possibly a dump truck. The ugly headlights seal the deal. And what are those things below the headlights? They look like a James Bond add-on for shooting death rays when pursuing an enemy spy.
Anyway, to answer the OP question, yes, I’d happily accept it – especially if it was one of the older vintage models that really looked classy. Maybe drive it on rare occasions, but it would be a PITA to insure. I’d probably take out liability-only coverage. Then I’d sell it as soon as the deal allowed.
Rolls, no. Make it a Ferrari, even an '80s Ferrari and I’d go for it. Then I’d drive it like I stole it until it broke–probably within a thousand miles if Top Gear is anything to go by.
My nephew lives in a rural area and has lots of space and he’s also a good mechanic. I’d keep it on his property and let him keep it tuned up and running, maybe even fix it up a bit. Then I’d give him a cut when I sold it.
If I couldn’t do that — probably not. In order to keep it on my own property I’d need to covert my garage from storage to an actual garage, right now we keep the cars in the driveway but it’s full…but if I stood to make a lot of money I might be inspired to figure it out,… That scenario is a gray area, I’d need more information on the car to decide.
Nope, never understood the appeal for dinosaur cars from dinosaur brands. If I wanted a classic I’d get a horse drawn wagon. Just seems like a maintenance and insurance nightmare, and who knows if it could even make the turns at drive throughs. What happens if it snows? And they’re soooo ugly, like a half-asleep Iron Man helmet.
I absolutely would. Not as a daily driver. But I would happily roll in it on nice weekend outings and drives in the country, or out to a formal cocktail party.
I would gratefully accept, and probably drive it in good weather or on highfalutin’ social occasions (not into any swimming pools, though, even if the Lord Mayor were standing right there). The Eighties styling of Rollses wasn’t ideal, I agree, but I don’t find them particularly unattractive.
I suspect I would sell the car at the earliest opportunity, though.
