See that doesn’t even make sense. It makes it sound like you were only pretending to be concerned about wasting the water and pooing in peoples mouths by proxy.
By the way, I’ve got a couple more zingers to put in your act:
CD: Why did the chicken cross the road?
IV: I don’t know, why?
CD: <takes a shit in the pool>
Me too. It really hit me when I saw little kids going in our local pool with diapers on. Now, I know what the inside of a diaper looks like, and I don’t want to swim in diaper soup. From there it wasn’t much of a leap to imagine the same water I’m spitting out of my mouth having recently been swirling around someone else’s - or my own - asshole.
As for the ocean, lakes and rivers, I’m pretty picky about those, too. I don’t enter the water in many places in the Caribbean because the charter boats don’t have holding tanks and the toilets just discharge directly into the “pristine” water. It’s pretty unsettling to see turds floating by while you’re snorkeling.
That’s what blows me away. I think I was an adult before I realized that it wasn’t just a joke, that people actually pee in pools. I’m still not sure I believe that really happens. (Yeah, I believe it, but it’s . . . way past weird for me.)
The thing is, in a pool where the water is being treated, all the little nasties from the poo are being catively killed. In the wake of a charter boat, not so much. If you’re really worried about it, you’re better off in the pool.
I remember reading an account by a former Playboy playmate about how there was a bar at the Playboy Mansion in Chicago that was underground and had a large plate-glass window behind the bar itself that provided an underwater view directly into the the swimming pool next to it. She said that once it was built people in the bar were horrifed to see the yellow clouds occasionally emanating from one or another of the pool’s swimmers (many of whom were probably nude to begin with).
Poor Hef! a person just can’t think of everything, can he?
But isn’t it true that solid flakes of shit can’t be completely sterilized by the chlorine since only the surface will be treated? Therefore, if you accidentally swallow pieces of the feces clouds in the water, won’t you be getting all the nasties after all?
That’s why they close the pool when someone has diarrhea, you get feces clouds. You can’t scoop out all the bits. If you have solid stool, there aren’t going to be any random bits, or anyway not enough to really matter. If you have a loose stool, the pool will be closed until enough time has passed to cycle the pool. That is, until it is reasonable to expect that all the water will have passed through the filter.
Here’s another joke option for you:
CD: Did you hear they’re planning a new Fantastic Four movie?
SM: No, really?
CD: <shits in pool>
One time I cough knew a little girl who was having so much fun in the pool she didn’t want to get out to use the bathroom, and she simply pulled her suit to the side for a moment. No stain!
My mom’s boyfriend had to grab the result out of the pool with a towel. :o
My neighborhood’s new pool is supposed to be opening in June; the HOA has sent everyone a list of rules. Number 4 on the list: “Training pants with snug fitting rubber pants or the newly design (sic) swim diapers are required for any infant/child not toilet trained. Fecal contamination will cause the pool to close for a minimum of 24 hours while water treatment is conducted.” However, the letter sent with the list of rules states that “rule violations [including non-swim-diapered children] sometimes require that the pool be drained”.
I admit that I skimmed, but I didn’t see any more reasons. It said if you peed in the pool, it would make people have red eyes. The mechanism by which this happens is that the free chlorine binds to the organic molecules in your urine and makes chloramines, which irritate the eyes. See also: sweat, oil from your skin, suntan lotion, mold growing in your swimsuit.
That’s just dumb, really. Not the part about the swim-diapered children. Proper swim diapers for little kids is a great idea. Closing the pool for 24 hours is overkill, and is more about making people feel like something is being done about the problem than doing something about the problem. Assuming it’s talking about an actual pool and not a wading/kiddie pool, draining the pool because someone let their kid in without a swim diaper is moronic. I suppose that’s what you get with HOAs.
