If you become one of the uber-rich, what weird or eccentric crap would you buy or bui

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
41

10 items that I would do:

  1. Reintroduce passenger airship travel to the US.

  2. Fund all of Eve’s books.

  3. Produce scott evil’s Broadway musicals.

  4. Build an old-fashioned mansion.

  5. Hire old-fashioned manservants.

  6. Donate statues to public parks of purely random people.

  7. Run for Congress as an independent.

  8. Build a first-class sports stadium without public funds.

  9. Start either a professional rugby league or a league to rival the current baseball/football/basketball/hockey leagues.

  10. Build a real theater for my old high school.

42

I’d build a mansion with aquariums for walls and ceilings. I mean, how awesome would that be?!

43

Thank you! No, I’ll not give any hints, other than to say: look for roads on the map leading into isolated areas. :slight_smile:

The first you’ll know about it is when you see a sign similar to ‘Border Inspection 1 grelznik ahead – Prepare to stop’.

Interestingly, remembering a crossing into Quebec from Vermont last year is what gave me the idea. I was northbound in the car of friends who knew the area, and the driver of the car was heading for a specific obscure border crossing. Even though he knew of the location and was actively searching for it, he almost missed the turnoff. We had to back up and make the turn, but then we were on the right road.

The landscape was trees and tall corn, and, except for an advance-warning sign ‘Customs/Douanes 1 mile’ we couldn’t see any indication of the international boundary. Suddenly there was a curve, and there in the middle of the two-lane road was a building with a gate on either side. We pulled up to the entering-Canada side, the customs agent inspected our passports and asked some questions, and we were in. There was a sign, ‘Bienvenue au Canada’, and another, ‘Bienvenue au Québec’. The next sign advised, ‘Signalisation Métrique’, and had a crossed out picture of a 60-mph speed-limit sign, and a green-circled picture of a 100-km/h speed-limit sign.

Another reverse curve, and then it was back into apparently-identical corn fields… after a change of country, language, and measurement-system.

Now what if the change was more unexpected and more extreme? :slight_smile:

44

I’d bribe the creator of my favorite flight simulator to add full combat capabilities to it. Complete with multimeg nukes.

You remember those full-scale replica Imperial Stormtrooper armors they were selling in “Sharper Image” awhile back? I’d get a platoon or two of them. Maybe have 'em rigged with anamatronics and set up at all the doorways in my mansion, so that they’d snap to attention and salute whenever I approached.

I’d buy the world’s fastest and most powerful supercomputer…and have it rigged to run Mac OS X. (No more “Graphic detail: Medium” on Rainbow Six for me!)

Bribe Maxis and EA Games to make some “Sim” games besides “The Sims” and “Sim City.” (I’m thinking “SimEarth 3000.” And I want be able to simulate every damn gas that could possibly exist in the atmosphere model!)

Pay for all my shareware.

Set up a $10 Billion fund to pay people $500 bucks if they’ll have themselves surgically sterilized.

I’d buy an XBox.

And the Batmobile. (From the '89 movie.)

I’d steal Tentacle Monster and Kasuo’s ideas.

Build Frank Lloyd Wright’s 1-mile high skyscraper. My penthouse would be at the top.

Practical jokes and hoaxes on a scale heretofore undreamt of by mortal man.

Start my own TV network, running only shows that I like and/or were unfairly canceled. I’d also have certain canceled shows (Firefly, Chip’n’Dale, Stark Raving Mad, etc.) put back into production.

Start another TV network…an all-anime one. Uncut anime.

Buy what’s left of Hitler’s skull from the Russians. Then I’d have the skull mounted in a portable urinal attached to a beer trailer, and start a “tour” of the world’s beaches, charging 25¢ a whiz on the skull (Holocaust survivors go free), plus whatever I make selling beer. (I should probably sell Soda, too…Pepsi and Coke will probably be beating my doors down to try and get exclusive rights.)

Hire enough lobbyists to put the U.S. Congress under my thumb. First, I’d have them legalize gay marriage. (Of course, then I’d probably go mad with power, and have “Miranda” repealed, legalize Gladiatorial games in lieu of capital punishment, make flying the Confederate flag a capital act of treason, make explicit nudity, violence, and profanity mandatory during Primetime, etc. So maybe I’ll hold off on the lobbyists…for now.)

Found a non-profit medical science institute dedicated to tampering in God’s domain. Human cloning, stem cells, brain transplants, the works.

Hire Lockheed to perfect the design of the Jet Pack.

Commission my favorite film and TV artists—Don Bluth, Tim Burton, and J. Michael Stancynski—to collaborate together on an animated theatical motion picture. And one that didn’t suck.

Restart “Space Marketing, Inc,” and launch 10 mile x 10 mile mylar “billboards” in Earth orbit, just to prove I could.

Commision the building of bridges across the Bering straight, and the straight of Gibraltar. And maybe some sort of bridge or Chunnel to connect Japan to mainland Asia. If, for no other reason, so that I could drive a '57 Chevy from the Florida keys to the northern tip of Scotland. (If I bring a camera along, I might get into National Geographic.)

Finally, I’d set things up so that after I die, I’ll be buried at the North Pole…of the moon. And I’m not talkin’ about cremains.

And…I’d no longer buy generic ice cream.

45

I buy a huge piece of beach front property in Waikiki, maybe everything within the Kuhio, Kapahulu, Kalakaua, Liliuokalani square. Although I suppose I’d have to build around the church. Turn the east half into a private home and the right half into an artist tourist spot. That is I’d build a little 2 or 3 story village with walking streets only 10 or 20 feet wide. Then I’d hire people to go around the world find artists of every scope and pay their way here to live in the second story and do their craft in the bottom and sell to people. Maybe I’d pay for supplies and give them a living stipend and we’d share the money brought in. Not just painters and sculptors but poets and writers. There’d be a few cafes and such. I’d probably have the roof top open too. I don’t care if it does sound contrived, I think it would be a real neat place to walk around in. I think I’d enjoy the energy. Billions well spent.

Of course I’d still have billions for myself and my 15 foot by 15 foot bed so I can stretch out and not have my arms and legs dangle over the side. Then a bath tup 3 feet wide, 7 feet long and 3 feet deep with a seat so that I can sit down and not drown. Plus a shower from the roof and sides that covers all the body and doesn’t allow me to get cold. And a home theater with 60 foot presentation screen. That’s a must have.

46

I’ve heard that base 3 is the most efficient numbering system.

I hope you hire a servant to check on you every few minutes or else I see you on the news. “Skeleton found velcroed to wall”

Oh, I’d also buy, pay to have transcribed millions of county records, census records, and other assorted genealogical useful items put online for free.

47

I would an Evil Genius ala Blofeld, Scorpio, Stewie, and The Brain; and pretty much try to conquer the world via ninjas, giant mechs (its not fun if I do it efficiently), battle droids, mercenaries and mutants.

Maybe I’ll make a super powerfull EMP device that would send the whole world into the stone age. Just to see what would happen.

48

That is, I would be an Evil Genius.

49

All my security would wear Master Chief armor. And we’d have a fully operational space station; if the US won’t let me launch the stuff I need, there’s always Russia or China.

50

I’d build Hobbiton and move in, throw a large birthday party and invite everyone. Presents for all!
I’d also try and book Sam, Elijah, Billy, and Dom to show up and wave.

51

I’d like a biiiig phucking flying boat. I’ve a soft spot for the Short Sunderland but I might need to get a replica built, preferably with the gun-turrets as it would be fun to pop off a few caps now and then. Mainly I’d just want it for bumming around assorted scenic parts of the world: the Caribbean, the South Pacific, the Great Lakes, the Med and so on.

If AD_USAF wanted a ride he would be welcome - I’m quite favourably disposed to the USAF - but he would have to meet me at a safe distance from that flak tower of his! :eek:

52

I would buy invitations to parties at YellowTail’s haunted mansion and bittersweet’s private island. Those sound like fun parties!

I would return the hospitality by chartering a cruise ship in the Caribbean, and inviting lots of Dopers, including YellowTail and bittersweet. It’s important to repay social favors.

I would buy out the Muslim authorities in Jerusalem, and hold my wedding on the Temple Mount. I’ll celebrate by throwing a big-ass party for all of Jerusalem.

And to swipe a line from Douglas Adams, I’d establish a trust fund to hold a very large festival every year on my birthday, forever, free of charge for all attendees. (I may have said this the last time we played this game.)

53

Two women.

At the same time.

I’m surprised I’m the first one to drop the reference, although I’m quite serious.

I’d also give all my friends all the money they needed to start their dream businesses or get situated in better careers or just climb out of debt.

I like Boscibo’s cat sanctuary idea a lot! I want to help!

And I’d commission musicians to create the perfect theme song for me, to be played whenever I entered a room, like in pro wrestling. Everyone would know it was me when they heard the first few bars of my own theme song! The music could also follow me when I walk down the street, play in the background when I had sex, or whatever else. Yea yea, theme song!

54

A large, multistory, underground luxury mansion out in the mountains. From the surface it would just be a small, unobtrusive-looking family house.

The top three floors of Roppongi Hills? Mine. I’d set up a giant catapult to fire water balloons across the city at the governor’s office.

Lots of large, anonymous donations to charities and research projects I like.

On call tutors for foreign languages or anything else I feel like studying.

Chuck Palahniuk to tell me bedtime stories.

And of course, hookers and fire trucks.

55

I’d personally fund production of Firefly and Angel for as long as Joss Whedon wanted…

56

I’d make a giant money bin like Uncle Scrooge from ducktails!

I’d hire a gaggle of goodlookin girls in g-strings who would run by in public when I paged them.

At my mansion, I’d have no furniture except for the bed and toilet and sink, the rest would be ‘created’ as needed by flexible naked ‘hot’ chicks.

Of all the women, they would each have a turn at being my footstool in public and in my house.

They would also all be registered to vote and they would vote anyway i told em too!

:smiley:

If i were really uber-rich i’d make sure nobody knew.

I’d never wear something twice if i were rich, then donate the clothes to charity.

Oh wells, teh “donald” has a book on how to get rich coming out methinks, guess ya’ll could buy it and become uber rich with a funky orange tupee like teh ‘donald’

57

Rwo things I would do:
-1) I would build a mansion with a series of rooms as described in Poe’s THE MASQUE OF THE RED DEATH-each room would be of all one color, example the blue room: blue carpet, drapes, walls, with blue glass windows. Of course, I would have a BLACK room-everything black-except the window (red glass)!
-2) I would wear one set of clothes ONLY ONCE-after, removing my clothes, they would be discarded!

58

First of all I’d pay for everyones Dope Subs. Then id start a chain of anime and manga shops across the UK because i swear HMV are overcharging me. I’d also pay so nintendo might actually advertise… And i’d go for the giant bed idea and the shower room. I’d buy a nice fast PC and otehr things i cant think of right now…

59

I’d fund the SDMB so generously that the Hamster and his missus could retire in relative obscurity on a nice island in the Caribbean, and make sure there was enough bandwidth that every person in existence could run a search on the word “the” simultaneously with no effect.

:smiley:

60

A first class game fowl farm. :smiley: