If you're comfortable sharing a dressing room with gay people, but not the opposite sex, why?

[CrazyCatLady]

I’m okay changing clothes in front of lesbians but not men (unless I know these men and know they’re gay.) I’ve been around a lot of lesbians over the years, and between slumber parties and gym class I’ve almost certainly changed clothes in front of some. Never, not even once, has one of them ever looked or said or done anything remotely inappropriate.

Straight guys, though? I’ve been gawked at, and grabbed at, and had some really icky comments. And that’s in public without me exposing more than a bra strap or what sticks out of a one-piece to any guy I’m not involved with since puberty. I can’t say for certain that it would be worse in close quarters and half-naked, but I can say for certain that I have NO interest in finding out.

[YogSothoth]

@miss_elizabeth

Getting a woman drunk for the purposes of sex, ESPECIALLY if you know or suspect she wouldn’t have sex with you sober, is rape. I assume you were joking, not casually admitting that you commit felonies, but it’s this type of laissez-faire attitude about rape and women’s safety that makes women wary of sharing a locker with men. Also, just being wary of men in general.

In other words, your joke isn’t funny.

Sorry, bad joke

[miss_elizabeth]

@YogSosoth

Sorry, bad joke

It’s cool, I wasn’t trying to blast you. But it was a striking in-thread example of the kind of male attitudes that make women nervous about showering with strange men.

[SanVito]

@DrFidelius

I have travelled enough in my life to have been exposed (heh) to many different levels of concern for public nudity, and I honestly believe that American neo-Victorianism is stupid and dangerous.

This reminds me of a HUGE row I had in a bar in Sicily with a couple of American blokes. They were talking about the women who went topless on the beach, making crude, juvenile remarks. I was trying to discuss how many Europeans didn’t have a problem with half naked women on the beach because the context wasn’t sexual, whereas they said the women should cover up or expect to get harassed because men can’t control themselves. Clearly they were a couple of douchebags but it did reveal the contrast in attitudes to nudity - for them, it was sexual and that was that.

[miss_elizabeth]

@SanVito

(snip…)
they said the women should cover up or expect to get harassed because men can’t control themselves.

I have run into this attitude a LOT. It’s a huge part of why I wouldn’t want to share a locker room with (American) men. It’s true the majority are not like this, but a sizable minority is. But I totally totally support working to change this stupidity, and then having mixed lockers. I think it would be wonderful for society.

[Pabitel]

Skin is just another set of clothes for me. If everyone else is copacetic then I would have no problem.

[Procrustus]

@CrazyCatLady

I’m okay changing clothes in front of lesbians but not men (unless I know these men and know they’re gay.) I’ve been around a lot of lesbians over the years, and between slumber parties and gym class I’ve almost certainly changed clothes in front of some. Never, not even once, has one of them ever looked or said or done anything remotely inappropriate.

.

I have never heard of an instance of a gay man acting in an offensive way to a other man in a locker room. I can’t say it has never happened, but it must be so rare that it hardly seems like a justification to feel uneasy being naked about gay men.