# I'm bored. Let's make up some new poker hands.

Yep. I’m a bored slacker. Here’s what’s been going through my mind for the last few minutes:

We need more poker hands. What I’ve been able to come up with are as follows. (“H” is for hearts.)
[ul][li]The Fibonacci: A,A,2,3,5[/li][li]The Ugly Fib: Any consecutive Fibonacci numbers[/li][li]The Fibonacci Suicide: 2H, 3H, 5H, 8H, KH[/li][li]The Fibonacci Flush: This should be obvious. It’s when you have a Fibonacci that you think will win, so you bet heavily and end up losing the hand. Or, it could be when they’re all the same suit. That makes sense, too.[/li][li]A Prime Hand: All prime numbers, each different from the other four in hand (J, K prime)[/li][li]Even Prime: Same as Prime Hand, except that one card is a 2[/li][li]Vulgar Prime: All primes, some repeats[/li][li]Straight Prime: A set of consecutive prime numbers[/li][li]Straight Prime Flush: Obvious…[/li][li]Complex Hand: When a Joker is accidently shuffled into the deck. Also known as The Dealer’s Demise.[/li][li]Golden Hand: A,6,A,8,10 (from the golden mean: 1.61810…)[/li][li]Golden String: 10,J,A,A,10 (from the golden string 1011010110…)[/li][li]The Suicide Beast: KH,6,6,6 [/li][li]Satan’s Convenience Store: 6,6,6,7,J[/li][li]And, of course, the Royal Sampler: 3,6,10,J,K[/ul][/li]I guess they’re all pretty specific, so they’ll be infrequent, I suppose.

There’s a few minutes down. What to do? What to do?

My favorite: The “Wrap-around” Straight

Ace, King, Queen, Two and Three (count Ace as “1” and can come after the King)

This give you “Wrap-around” Straight Flush also.

How bout odd or even:
any run of odd or even:

Ace, 3, 5, 7, 9;
2, 4, 6, 8, 10

One step higher if they are flush
Highest if they are the same suit

:eek:

Idiot’s Flush, AKA “all reds” or “all blacks.” Ranks above a pair but below trips.

Straight Idiot and Royal Idiot are self explanatory.

Acehole: Four of a kind aces showing, hole card is assumed to be another ace.

The Soviet Flush: All red cards
The Farrakan Flush: All black cards
The Librarian Straight: Any five cards found back to back in this sequence Ace Eight Five Four Jack King Nine One Queen Seven Six Ten Three Two

(emphasis mine)

The real trick to this hand is finding a 56 card deck to play with.

The Duck: QAAAK

The pi: 3A4A6

The Draw Four of a Kind: Has an Uno card thrown in by mistake

The Reverse Straight: Same as a straight, but in reverse order

Avogadro’s Hand: 6 2 J 2 3

My girlfriend’s family’s poker house rules include a “squish,” which is a 3- or 4-card straight; it’s usually invoked only for split-pot hands (“Best squish splits with the winner”).

The Grand Buffet: 88724 (ate and ate 7/24)

The Hole In One: 4444A (fore!)

The Queer Eye: QQQQK (4 queens for a king)

The Neverland Ranch Hand: JJJJ5 (Jacks an 5)

The Bo Derrek: Q 10 10 10 10 (Queen of the tens)

The Jeff Strykker: JJJJ 10 (Jacks 10)

Ah, yes. Similar to a Khmer Rouge Flush, except the KRF is dealt by a ten-year old kid with an AK-47. If the kid is has money in the pot on that hand, it’s best to fold right away.

Our regular poker game participants have been trying to spread the acceptance of the ‘condo’. Which is any hand with three pairs, obviously in stud or hold-em. I have always felt that is a hand just crying out to be named.

The triple run, or the 23:

45556

worth 23 points in cribbage!

This inspired my South East Asian Gambit:

QATAAR

T=10
R=Any red card

Oops…obviously should be QATAR.

I recently wrote an article on non-standard poker hands for Wikipedia:

From lowest to highest:

• High card
• Pair
• Four Straight - Also called Bobtail Straight. Four cards in consecutive order.
• Four Flush - Also called Bobtail Flush. Four cards of the same suit.
• Two Pair
• Blaze - Also called Blazer. All cards are jacks, queens, or kings.
• Flash - One card of each suit plus a joker.
• Little Bobtail - A three card straight flush (three cards of the same suit in consecutive order).
• Three of a Kind
• Skeet - Also called Pelter or Bracket. A hand with a deuce; a three or a four; a five; a six, a seven, or an eight; and a nine.
• Five and Dime - All cards are fives, sixes, sevens, eights, nines, or tens with no pair.
• Skip Straight - Also called Alternate Straight, Dutch Straight, or Skipper. Cards are in consecutive order, skipping every other card. (Example 3-5-7-9-J).
• Round the Corner Straight - Consecutive cards including a ace which counts as both the high and low card. (Example Q-K-A-2-3).
• Straight
• Little Dog - All cards are deuces, threes, fours, fives, sixes, or sevens with no pair.
• Big Dog - All cards are nines, tens, jacks, queens, kings, or aces with no pair.
• Little Tiger - Also called Little Cat. All cards are threes, fours, fives, sixes, sevens, eights, and nines. (Some house rules prohibit nines.)
• Big Tiger - Also called Big Cat. All cards are eights, nines, tens, jacks, queens, or kings with no pair.
• Flush
• Full House
• Big Bobtail - A four card straight flush (four cards of the same suit in consecutive order).
• Four of a Kind
• Straight Flush
• Skeet Flush - The same cards as a Skeet and all in the same suit.
• Five of a Kind - Four of a kind plus a wild card, or three of a kind plus two wild cards.

We call these the “every-other straight” and allow them if the dealer specifies. We play a lot of dealer’s choice. I’ve also heard them called Big Tiger and Little Tiger, but I think that’s a misuse of those terms.

Of existing hands, there’s also the Wheel aka the Bicycle, which is an Ace-low straight. In most hi-low or lowball games, this is the lowest possible hand.

The Motown: Jacks and Fives (Jackson Five)

The sympathy hand (i.e., the worst possible hand): 2 of clubs & the 3,4,5 and 7 of diamonds. Can anyone think of a worse hand?

Better check your geography, as well as your spelling