The only exception to my “so what?” reply to someone outing themselves to me would be if my girlfriend told me she was a lesbian, and even then only if it meant “cock-free, 100% vagitarian lesbian,” because then I’d have to find another girlfriend.
But I’d thank her for all the sex and wish her well.
Nah… anyone can bump their uglies against anyone or anything they want.
If you are not bumping them against me… then in my sexual world you don’t exist.
On a less flippant tone… My son came out to me in a very “in your face accept me on my own terms” manner. It wasn’t needed. there was nothing more to accept… he was my son. He was already accepted for everything and anything he was.
That’s nice.
Can you please pass the cheese dip?
Actually I have three friends almost everyone knows are gay, none have come out to me, and I am actually a little sad, because that probably means they think I will judge them, which I will most certainly not do.
The only person whose coming out would affect me would be my husband’s. I rather like him.
I don’t care. I’ve never had someone come out but various people I knew in high school and random co-workers have made it obvious in the same way I might make it obvious I’m straight (I talk about my g/f, Bob says “Oh my boyfriend does the same thing”). It’s a non-issue.
I’d care. Not in a bad way, but in the sense that I care about all my friend’s tastes and preferences: with my oldest girlfriends, we’ve spent significant time talking about what we like in produce. What you like in a bed partner is certainly a Big Deal, and worth talking about. If it’s a good friend, I’d want to know how long you’d known you were gay, what the process of coming to that realization was like for you, why you decided to come out now, who you’ve told and who you haven’t and why. I’d want to know if you had any regrets about it–do you see being gay as a cruel trick of fate (I hope not) or something to celebrate or just a thing, like eye color. I’d want to know how your mom reacted.
I’d want to know many of the same things if you told me you were moving, or course, or pregnant, or had taken a new job. Sexual orientation is a big part of who a person is. If I care about you, I care who you sleep with–not to influence, but simply to understand who you are. Isn’t that a big part of friendship?
Exactly this. If it matters to you, it matters to me. Otherwise, we can go on the way we always have.
*That *was funny!
And manila, you’re a great parent. Good on you.
Miss Manner’s once said “it doesn’t matter if he is interested in the same sex, the only thing that matters is that he isn’t interested in YOU.”
I can’t say I’d be overjoyed if either of my kids were to come out (seems unlike - at 10 and 11 they show every sign of being straight), but that has more to do with a mother’s desire to have her kids have an easy life, not my own prejudice. Its just still HARDER to live life if you are gay.
I don’t.
The first time I came out to someone in the real world, her response was “oh, is that all?” I found that a very reasuring thing.
Now when I talked about it to my dad, he took a lot longer to come around. I don’t think it helped that he previously assumed I was gay. Poor guy, if only it’d been something so simple.
Straight guy here…
It doesn’t bother me a bit!
Live and let live!!!
Nope. Good luck to you (with anyone who MIGHT care)
I’ve been out for literally decades, yet I don’t recall one instance when I actually declared “I’m gay” to anyone. It just doesn’t work that way for me. How many straight people go around telling everyone “I’m straight,” yet in the course of normal conversation they make it known. So all I really have to do is mention my partner or the chorus I sing in, or AIDS-related volunteer work, and people get the general idea. The only time I might simply come right out and say “I’m gay” would be to correct someone who assumed otherwise.
Yep. I’ve actually slept with (been asleep in the same bed as) two gay friends, once during a job-hunting expedition to SF, and once when vacationing on the cheap. Just because a guy is gay doesn’t mean he wants to jump your bones. They actually have other aspects to their lives besides their sexuality.
Airman Doors, USAF, don’t want to put you on the spot, but do you have any insight as to how others in the military might feel about it? Supposedly, being Gay is cause to crush moral in the military?
At the college where I teach, we have lots of ex-military guys going to school on the GI Bill, and so far, I have not seen an iota of homophobia in any of them - they get along with the Gay guys and some are even pretty good friends.
If anyone else has military experience (current or past), feel free to comment as well.
I don’t care in the sense that the OP is probably asking about.
But there are all sorts of decent reasons to care whether or not someone is gay. I had the crushing experience earlier this year of finding out a woman I had a strong crush on was a lesbian. I cared. If I found out that a male friend of mine is gay, I might worry that he could get HIV.
But I can’t care in the sense that I object.
Kind of a silly question here dont you think! Your only going to get one response, most of the people here (from my experience) are above average intelligence, therefore less ignorance running rampant! And when you have ignorance, you have…
Um, has your male friend abstained from sex unless it was with a man? Cuz, not sure if you got the memo that was passed out, oh, id say 15 years ago, HIV transmission isnt segregated by gender!
According to the CDC, 71% of HIV cases in adult men and adolescents in America are among MSM, even though only five to seven percent of adult men self-identify as MSM (as of 2005). (http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/topics/msm/resources/factsheets/msm.htm)
If I’m doing my arithmetic right, that means that gay men are somewhere between 32 and 49 times as likely to have HIV as are straight men. But even if I’m not accounting for certain social aspects of HIV or I’m not doing my arithmetic right, you can see that the chances of catching HIV are much, much, much, much higher for gay men than they are for straight men or women.