…I know that the well has been poisoned against telemarketers, often because of the actions of some telemarketers. That makes a tough, but honest, job tougher for all of us. I come from outside this business and am working to be what I have been historically: the best damned whatever in whatever industry (not just company) I am working in. I have been working for several decades and bring a broad background to the position, so I have some comments I hope will help all of us have a more satisfying experience.
To my cow-orkers, whom I like as people:
We work on the phone and the partitions are only four and a half feet high. There is no need to stand while you are on the phone, and when you do you often speak louder than the people I am trying to talk to. Please sit down.
This is a place of business. It is not a singles bar. Some of you are selling more than I am (not an accomplishment since I have been on the phones for only five days), but imagine how badly you would trounce the fat, old newbie if you did not spend much of the day flirting with the pretty women. Loudly. And no, I am not jealous of your youth and sexual prowess. I’m having a laugh thinking how you, telemarketers working for telemarketer pay, think you have a real chance with these women.
The same goes for sports. If that is so important to you perhaps you would be happier in a different line of work. Perhaps if you had shut up and worked harder for a sports scholarship in high school you would not be here. But probably not, so just shut the fuck up and do your job.
To my supervisors, whom I also like just fine:
We have a morning meeting. That is when you should announce stupid things like who won the “Bears Squares,” not in the middle of the afternoon while people are on the phone. I had to apologize to a customer because it was sounding like I was calling from a train station at rush hour. Also, please do not interrupt the work day several times so our team-for-a-day could answer trivia questions for “points.” I love trivia. I could beat anybody in the office. But I do not want to play games at work. I’m boring like that.
I had a CEO who read every business bestseller that came out and varied his management style and his expectations of us nmonthly. I fought in, and survived, nearly every skirmish in the Quality Wars of the Nineties. I know what you are doing and can predict what you will do next to motivate us. I, for one, am not motivated by raffle tickets, lottery tickets, or weekly awards. Contrary to what you were told in your “bringing supervisors up from the trenches” management class, what motivates me is not having a good time at work or getting to know my cow-orkers better. I am motivated by the opportunity to pay my bills. A team meeting in which we all share a little-known fact about ourselves does not help me reach that goal and is, in fact, a waste of time that would be better spent selling our client’s product. You know–doing my job. The client, ever mindful of our hours, would agree.
And is there any way to devalue the top-five salesmen awards quite as effective as giving them out daily? At least there aren’t certificates for it, like the weekly award.
I see the value of this product, know how it could be very helpful for many people, and I want them to sign up for the free trial because I can get a bit evangelical about things I believe in. To do this I can access a part of my personality that is genuinely friendly and interested in helping others, while being a bit tenacious. However, my background is in engineering and my sales personality switches off the same moment the phone connection is broken. Please don’t be hurt if I don’t work for the monthly Attitude award. I take a lousy photograph, anyway.
At the same time, I have been salaried-exempt for most of my life. I get bored easily doing nothing and the TV in the lunch room is tuned to CNN so I end up bored and mad. Don’t be surprised to find me trying to log onto my computer ten minutes before the end of lunch. I am not trying to get overtime, but idle hands–lemme see if I remember this–idle hands make Jack a dull boy? Something like that.
I know you have no power over this and I can see that our margins are thin, but the option of medical insurance would be nice. It would probably reduce turnover, too.
However, I do appreciate that I can personalize the spiel as long as I hit certain points.
To my customers, to whom I am mostly indifferent:
These are not cold calls. You are already a customer, and have been for as long as ten years. After all this time you should expect that we will try to sell you an upgrade or an expansion now and then. Don’t act so surprised.
I know the call shows up on your caller ID as a bunch of zeros rather than our company name. We are trying to fix that, but it is taking surprisingly long. Rather than yelling at me take heart that you are current on all of your bills and are not afraid to pick up a call from an unknown party. I wouldn’t answer that call on a bet. And if you are in a business meeting and that number comes up on your cell phone, DO NOT TAKE THE FUCKING CALL! Put me into voicemail. I promise I will not leave a message that you have to listen to.
I will tell you I am in marketing, but a moment’s thought will tell you I do not work directly for the company I represent, but in a job that has been outsourced, like nearly every other telemarketer job on Earth. I cannot help you with your billing or technical issues, nor can I transfer you to to the customer service department. All I can do is give you a phone number to reach someone who can help you. And another one three minutes of your bitching later. And yet another after another three minutes of pretending I am listening to you. I can only hope I did not make you mad when I said, “Thank you for your time. I hope you can work that out. Have a nice weekend,” and hung up, but I doubt you noticed it at all.
I am happy to place you on the Do Not Call list and have already figured a way around how you could still get calls for the next thirty days while your request wends its way through channels. After all, I do not wish to speak with you ever again, either. There is no need to swear at me while I read the legalese I am required to read. What you can do is hang up while I finish reading it for the benefit of our legal department, but I guess some people just like to bitch.
You have a website. How, I do not know because you claim you cannot even open a Word document. You do not sound elderly so I just hope the 21st Century does not eat you alive, though that may explain why you can take my call on a weekday morning.
I am sorry I cannot send you an email about the offer and product, nor can I take your call when you decide to pull the trigger. Really, really sorry because I know how it will benefit you immediately. What I can do is have somebody call you in a week after you look at the sales website so he can take the order, if you did not buy it online. Though I am not on commission the thought of losing a sale to the loud guy [del]sitting[/del] standing next to me after I laid all the groundwork pains me right sore. However, if you trust me that my pitch is nearly done and that we will remind you long enough before your trial period is over that even your sweet granny could cancel it before you need to start paying AND that the product has many more features than I can tell you in a reasonable time, I am being honest when I say you are far better off getting the trial now. But why would you trust me? I’m just a telemarketer.
The well is poisoned because telemarketers pissed into it. Nobody wants to hear from you. Your “honest job” makes the world a worse place to live in for everyone you bother. I have more respect for junkie panhandlers, who at least have the decency not to fucking harass me at home.
A person who chooses to work in a telemarketing job has little to no redeeming qualities as a human.
Also, you reek of the shit and piss that your well has been poisoned with. A smell that may never leave you - no matter how eloquently you try and defend yourself. Have fun with that.
Good grief, people. I suspect **dropzone **would rather have any job than telemarketer, but he wants to pay his bills. There’s no need to abuse him like this; he’s been (from what little I recall, I’ll admit to rarely paying attention to who’s making the post) a decent poster. (No, I’m not a telemarketer, nor have I ever been one, nor do I know anyone who has, nor do I particularly like getting calls from one. But unless they get abusive with me, I treat them civilly. Let’s not broadbrush him.)
I like telemarketers… when they’re not working. I play soccer and tailgate with some. But ANYone who calls me unsolicited is invading my privacy, and inconveniencing me. So I resent them, even if they’re offering me free Circus Peanuts for a year.
So I’d guess what you’re experiencing here, dropphone, is that even if we’re glad to hear from a telemarketer who’s a professional with high standards, you’re still one of those…[/disdain]
But I’d prescribe coming back to The Pit to bitch about your coworkers. And those managers following the latest fad (that stuff was great!).
I’ve done telemarketing before. It really is a thankless job. Many people seem to believe that most telemarketers just love cold-calling people for hours on end when, in actuality, the opposite is true. Most people take telemarketing jobs because there aren’t any other jobs available (seriously. I used to work at this place named TMC and there were people there with Master’s degrees because they couldn’t find gainful employment). Most telemarketing companies-- at least the one I worked for-- treat their employees like shit, but you have to do what you have to do to eat/pay your bills. This is why I’ve never understood the hate for telemarketers. Nowadays, I’m not mean to telemarketers in the slightest. I’ll let them give me their speech and politely tell them I’m not interested if I’m really not interested. Though once in a while you can get good deals from telemarketers, depending on why they’re calling, so it’s always good advice to at least give them a few minutes of your time.
(ETA> Apparently, some people don’t realize how utter garbage the economy is right now.)
If you people don’t want this guy calling you at home, find him a different job, that pays about the same, in his area.
Until you do that, personal insults make you all sound like a pack of assholes.
If you don’t want to listen to a telemarketer, just hang up. No explanation, no warning, just quietly hang up. That’s what I do, and it works quite well.
It’s easy to be careless with superlatives, but I assure you that I’m not being glib when I say that this is hands-down the dumbest thing you’ve said since joining the board.
I’m confused - if they’re flirting with customers, how do they know they’re pretty? Are these the same people who think they’re talking to hot women on sex chat lines, when they’re speaking to a Godzilla look-alike who happens to have a sexy voice?
And if you’re referring to flirting with co-workers, don’t they make telemarketer pay too, and so shouldn’t be above getting involved with fellow employees?
Speaking from experience, there’s quite a bit of hanky-panky that goes on between call center employees. Dude, a LOT. Even I have participated a couple of times. One ended more or less OK, one did not.
