It’s winter break here in the midwestern U.S. of A and to show my support of the New Year’s weather (upper 50’s, lower 60’s), I have decided to make an “accessory” for my SO. Does anyone have any suggestions or prior experiences in the art of brassiere making?
I’m specifically looking for advice on how to get the meat out. Do I chisel out the whole thing with the knife or is there some fluid that will eat away at it until its gone? Also, what’s the best way to split a coconut exactly in half? Will a saw do it or would that splinter the nut? I’m going to have to be exceedingly careful with the nuts that I find because I haven’t seen many in stores here that are of the necessary circumference. What is the best material to use for straps and lining? How about smoothing and varnishing?
Thank you for the advice, if I receive any. If this project comes to fruition I shall include it in my college resume and I will make sure to give credit where credit is due.
Well, I can’t help you out with making one, but if you give up and just want to buy one, I work at a costume shop. We have several! I’m pretty sure they’re the “one size fits most” variety, so they might not work if she’s amply-endowed. Best of luck to you in your efforts.
You’ll have to use a power saw or something similar to make a single clean cut across the diameter. Or a hand saw with a vice to hold the coconut for you. There will be some liquid in there (drink it! It’s like drinking sunshine!) which will slosh out all over your saw, unless you drain it first. So I would drill two holes in a little line, drain the liquid, then cut over the holes. The meat will come out fairly easily when it’s fresh.
If you like your SO, please round and sand down the edges for comfort. Then drill a couple of holes to thread raffia through (more comfy than twine, you can get it at a craft store) and voila, you’re done!
I’d love a coconut bra, but I just don’t see it fitting. Anyone know where I can get a jackfruit?
Goggleing the jackfruit: The fruit is huge, seldom less than about 25cm in diameter. Even a relatively thin tree (circa 10 cm) can have huge fruits hanging on it. The fruits can reach 36kg in weight and up to 90cm long and 50 cm in diameter. The jackfruit is the largest tree borne fruit in the world
WhyNot, I may be evil but I SO need to see photo proof…
Well, that was sort of the joke, but in the interest of fighting ignorance and all, I just measured and I would indeed require a fruit with a 25 cm diameter to fit around one of the girls - forward protrusion need only be about 18 cm, as they’re still surprisingly perky for their heft. (42F or G, for those playing along at home.) Unfortunately, I have the ass and thighs to match, so I’m not quite the Barbie doll you were probably hoping for.
But yeah, out of the range of coconuts, I’m afraid.
If you make the bra properly, they should pop right out when she removes it. If you need a chisel, that should be a sign that you made the bra too tight. Glad I could be of assistance.
Don’t even bother. Bra-making involves a billion little variables no man should ever know. Cup size, cup placement, band size, shoulder strap adjustment. It is not as easy as it looks.
Varnish, please. Coconuts are fibrous. Any good thick polyurithane should do. I also vote for satin straps instead of rafia.
If you’re thinking tropical though, you should know that traditional hula was performed bare breasted (once they decided it wouldn’t anger the gods for women to dance). Cite, scroll down a bit.
And for the perfectionists out there, Tahitian dancers are usually the ones wearing coconut bras nowadays, and Tahitian dance is different from Hula, which is Hawaiian, but I can’t find a link right now. So there!
As someone who has worn a coconut bra, they are awkward and sorta uncomfortable, and I would highly doubt fit any one properly. Spend your time finding a nice tropical bikini top (optional,) make a nice grass skirt if you must, and go buy a can of coconut milk to spread liberally. The visuals/taste/texture on that scenario are much better.
The bra I wore seemed only vaguely related to the coconuts in the store. You would just use maybe 1/3 of an end, not a half, the half would be too constricting, you’d have to wedge the breast in there. And take all the fibrous stuff off, polish it, varnish, wait for it to dry, sand down the rough edges, string it to the right dimensions…
