I’m no racist… but I do like mustard on my hot dog.
Can I have some fried kitty and beer?
Beer goes with everything. Chocolate cake, kitties, turtle soup, Belgians…
I agree with this to an extent. I believe that if the case is akin to someone morbidly confessing (think: Albert Fish and his letters) to the first degree murder of a toddler that they raped, brutalized and mutilated, we should return the favor and give them some kind of torture…Just in the name of fairness. But overall? I don’t think it’s necessary. What if we torment a criminal and found out that they’re truly innocent?
We’re supposed to be Global Police, not Rioters. 
Shoot, son, that just makes you Uh-Mer-i-cun!
You truely are the most interesting man…
Wait… that wouldn’t be YELLOW mustard would it? Pfft, you are SO racist!
What…the guy likes mustard on his dog? Big deal. I bet, given the opportunity, he’d put mayo, ketchup, relish or even sauerkraut on there. Probably a combination, probably even chili! Nah. Dude’s no racist, just a perv. And there’s nothing wrong with being a perv so long as you do it alone.
[serious hat]
Sort of. Ok? It was sort of a joke. See, I’m all about “live & let live” but I’m also human which means thre is a very strong streak of, “My way or the highway” mixed in as well. This thread was a performance art interpretation of the conflict between the two ideals. Only the ‘live and let live’ part is background noise to my more imperious, primal if you will, nature. The aim of the piece is to toss out something outlandish that makes a frightening amount of sense, but which also is universally offensive. Or at least ought to be to any right-thinking people.
“A little death without mourning
no call and no warning.
Baby…a dangerous idea
that almost makes sense”
Well shit son…
I was all pumped about receiving your newsletter…but now I find out your just some artsy fartsy hippie type.
Is it too late to cancel my subscription?
Yes, but if you like slapping hippies I could still be your huckleberry.
Very nice, Inigo, but why does your list of Miscreants and Useless Fucks to be Destroyed not include the six-fingered man, hm? It’s not like we have proof that you found and destroyed him, you know! Hexadigitalia is a bane upon the earth, I say! Orf with it!
There’s a brand of moron I’d like to add to the list, but I don’t know if I’ll be able to explain them properly. It’s the kind of person who teach children things so utterly and retrogradelysup[/sup] bigoted and wrong that they would be considered awfully inappropriate by a Stepford wife.
1: is too a word!
You mean like people who teach them to put sugar on grits instead of salt/pepper/butter? Cuz I’m totally with you on that one, sister.
I’m not particularly knowledgeable of the foodstuffs involved therefore can not opine, but I shall make a note to myself that grits should get salt/pepper/butter and not sugar. I assume that means honey and syrup are also out?
I’m talking about things like overhearing a genuinely-confused little kid say “but Mom, if boys can’t use pink things, why have you made a pink sauce for the salad?”
Gotcha… so as long as we keep killing Americans (by “we” I mean the Belgians, obviously*) you will change your leaders and stop insisting pommes frites come with ketchup rather than mayonnaise?
*although not a Belgian myself I do feel entitled to speak on their behalf
And yet… I’m not!