I suspect I’ll be afraid of my mother 20 years after I’m dead.
This exchange is funny, intentional or not.
I’m afraid of ALL of your mothers now. :shudder:
Shit, I’m the guy they warn their daughters to stay away from.
Sounds good, but I think Techno-Coots has a better flow. 
I’m so old my Buick has cataracts.
You just made my day, Nzinga, Seated. You really did.
How does a senior hold up a checkout line by buying lottery tickets? In my state, lottery tickets are dispensed from a machine that’s placed usually across the aisle from the checkout lines. Do they not have these lottery machines everywhere?
No. 
We have free computer classes at the library. I often teach Intro to Computer I, which is mostly an introduction to clicking the mouse. Average age: five thousand years old.
A thousand blessings on your head.
(And that mouse-clicking line wasn’t just hyperbole; I had an elderly student picking her mouse up. lifting it very carefully straight up into the air. “Well, I want the arrow on the screen to move UP, don’t I?”)
My father-in-law (age 82) has taken a few computer classes. While I know it can be frustrating to teach that age group, I can’t even tell you how much difference it made to him. It really opened up a whole new world for him, even if he does have to call my husband pretty frequently for tech support for things like “I broke Picasa” and “My printer won’t do what I tell it to.”
And I can almost promise you (because, really, I wasn’t there) that he didn’t make any rude gestures or comments about women’s figures. Not his style.
I’m going to steal that sentence. I have no idea what I will do with it. It may just end up gathering its own dust in my hoard, but I’m going to steal it.
You have gone beyond pedantry and entered the realm of tetrapyloctomy. Not that that’s a bad thing.
Sadly, as we age our night vision fades even without cataracts. I found that out in a street construction zone signage class. Apparently it happens so gradually that most of us don’t realize it’s happening.
Dagnabbit, you whippersnappers get all the fun classes. Back in my day, we had the three R’s, and as soon as you figgered out that most o’ those didn’t really start with an R, you were gradjiated.
No more lollygagging here, dang it, ah gots to take the trolley uptown an’ git me a new onion fer mah belt…
Well, I damn sure noticed it when all the web sites started gradually making their font sizes smaller and smaller! Boobs all stayed big, print got tiny!
I do have a problem with people going up escalators walking. What do they think escalators were invented for?
And how many seconds are they saving? 2…3? There is such a thing as being ridiculous in saving time. Similar to speeding up to a red traffic light. Which I only see relatively young farts do.
Agree completely. Young kids, elderly, handicapped may all be using it. The only time I walk on an escalator is if there is no one else on it and/or it’s an extra long one.
Around here, strollers, wheelchairs etc. are not permitted on escalators, though I frequently see the strollers. They are supposed to use the elevators.
I haven’t found escalator standing to be something only old people do (though most old people will stand on the escalator), but just threw that in there because it’s something that irritates me. Whenever I see people standing still on the escalator, I think of that Family Guy chase scene where they’re running the entire time, but when they get to the escalator, they just stand still. The worst offenders are the (fortunately few) people during rush hour at the train station who stand to the left. Stand to the right, walk to the left, people. We’ve gone over this!
From the Washington State Department of Labor and Industries and the Otis Elevator Co.
Under Escalator and Moving Walk Safety Tips
Escalator steps are not the correct height for normal walking and should not be used in that manner. The risk of tripping and falling is greatly increased.
On escalators, stand in center of step and face forward.
On moving walks, stationary passengers should stay to the right and let those walking pass on the left.
Under Escalator and Moving Walk Rules
Stand facing forward
Wa. Govt Esc & Elev Rules
Otis Worldwide
Here’s a YouTube video posted to show some idiosyncratic behavior but also shows normal and safe use.
I must have cataracts. Movie theaters seem dark to me, too.
Is nobody going to mention Betty White’s Off Their Rockers? I don’t know why I find that show absolutely hilarious.