See this pisses me off. You’re nice, they’re pushing the boundries and when you push back you’re the mean one. Fuck that.
I am generally kind to old people but I think we should turn the tables on them when they go over the line. I’m not sure how yet, I’m still half asleep but I think we should work on ways to turn their oldness against them in this battle.
All I know is, suddenly everybody’s putting it in my salad and telling me it’s some sort of superfood. But will it help me poop?
I think it should be mandatory to be euthanised at age 60. Then once everybody comes to terms with this and it becomes an accepted part of our culture, we could have some cracking reality TV series about the inventive ways 59 year olds decide to go out in flames instead of waiting for the government to come kill them.
Would totally be worth it.
It’s the middle of the day, I’m driving somewhere, and some asshole in traffic is going 20 under the speed limit, drifting across the center line, driving with his turn signal on for 5 miles, or pulling some other bullshit traffic maneuver that shows a blithe ignorance that there are other cars sharing the road with him.
It is almost always:
The reason I say “middle of the day” is because the olds tend to go home and sleep at night, so by the time evening rush hour starts, they’re mostly off the roads.
I may not be entitled to an opinion — being (barely) in the target demographic of the OP’s rant — but for years I’ve borne in mind a sign that used to hang on the wall of the late, lamented local Shakey’s Pizza:Before you complain about the coffee, remember: you’ll be old and weak yourself someday.
Ya’ll straight up pittin’ old folks up in here. I see serious posts too, (MsWhatsit) No. I won’t do it with yall. I’m drawing my line.
ETA: Oh, no! Not Anaamika too!
I’m totally behind you. The amount of stuff old people get away with just because they’re old! I particularly hate the “You’re so young, you don’t know anything,” attitude.
Of course I’m going to get old. But I am bound and determined to not be a cantankerous old bitch when I get there. I want to be the kind of old woman that people admire, not that people roll their eyes to and go “Granny…shut up.”
I support this rant.
Everybody is behind this but you.
You’re going about this all wrong. You shouldn’t be complaining about the various ways that old people make your life miserable; you should taking notes … so that when you’re an old person, it’ll be that much easier to make your loved one’s lives miserable. You won’t even have to make anything up; you’ll have a game plan.
Wait, ‘old’ is a noun now? :dubious:
Damn kids and their changing nouns to verbs and vice versa. Next thing you know we’ll be rhubarbing speed or some such nonsense.
When I am old, if I am holding up the line at the grocery store because I can’t find a dollar in my change purse, or I am driving 20 under the speed limit all day, I hope all the young people around me immediately go home and post a giant rant about me on the Internet, because I will deserve that.
Edit: Everyone knows that you curtain speed these days. Rhubarbing is for punks.
Ok. When I’m in line behind an old black woman at the gas station and she is ordering lotto tickets with numbers in every variation known to math and “box that for me baby, but run those straight” and I only have one little thing in my hand to pay for, I sometimes secretly wish she would slip and break a damn hip.
I feel like shit now.
Fuck you, bitch. Take the stairs.
Why’d you have to mention that she’s black? Is that important to your story somehow? Would you tell us if she was white or asian or blue or purple? Some people.
It doesn’t bother me when white people do it.
Yeah, this, totally. Assholes get old and that doesn’t transform them into sweet elderly folks who are just so cute. I can’t stand it when old people get a pass for their bullying or abusive behavior just because they’re old. And then I get told that I’m mean for holding an old man to account because he’s old! Fuck that.
Got you beat. Yes, shit like this happens to me.
Not so many of them get old, they are kinda thoughtful that way.
Those are the ones that really bug me. 80 year old people spending a half hour buying $100 in lottery tickets, oblivious to the line forming behind them.