We have a middle-aged cat who simply will NOT stop peeing in places that are not his litter box. We’ve tried everything. This is a neutered cat. He is not “spraying” that I can observe, just doing the normal pee.
We have tried thoroughly deodorizing each place he goes. He just finds another place. He does use his litter box also. He has been checked out by the vet and there are no physical ailments. It’s not a matter of being unable to get to his box in time; he will walk past a pristine litter box, jump up on a table or high dresser and pee there. We have so far coped by putting towels over plastic in his favorite places and changing the towels as soon as he uses them. We’ve prevented him from accessing the living room, which has upholstered furniture.
However, this whole process has become unacceptable. We can’t have guests over. We have to be compulsive about keeping the living room doors closed and securely latched all the time.
So, we’ve decided the poor thing is going to have to be euthanized. We can’t even give him away. Nobody’s going to want him.
Obviously, if anyone has a suggestion, I’d be glad to hear it, but we’re at the end of our rope.
I’m thinking of telling the granddaughter that we have sent Skippy to live on a farm where he can be outside and pee anywhere he wants. If she asks why don’t we let him live outside in our yard, my answer will be that the “bad cats” in the neighborhood would hurt him. There is a large feral cat population nearby, and it really would be cruel to put him outside to probably be beaten up and to catch the diseases that I am sure they have.
On the other hand, there’s a philosophical part of me that wonders if at 3 years old she should be told the truth. She knows he pees in inappropriate places. She herself has recently learned to use the toilet. I am afraid that whether I tell her the truth (we killed him because he pees on the carpet) or the “sent to a farm” story, she’s going to think that if she has an accident the same thing might happen to her.
Suggestions, comments and commiseration are all welcome.
Is the litter box covered? Uncover it. If he’s going past it and finding elevated areas to go, it sounds to me like he thinks the litter box is unsafe. Cats need to feel like the place where they’re eliminating is escapable if a predator (i.e. another cat, dog, scary human, toddler) were to approach while they’re squatting. Ideal locations for litter boxes are not always the same to a cat as they are to the person placing the box.
The general rule for litter boxes is one per cat plus one. For cats with issues, it could be more. If one box has too much going on around it (like it’s in a heavily-trafficked area and there are too many people in the room or walking past) then another box in a different room may be a preferred choice at that time. If there’s no second choice, then the cat will find a spot of his own.
I got nothing for the toddler. Haven’t dealt with them enough to know. Isn’t three a little young for understanding death, especially under this kind of circumstance?
We have 2 cats and 3 litter boxes. One is in each bathroom, plus one in a corner of the dining room. We have tried several different litters, too. I can’t see how the center of the DR table or the back of a couch, or a pile of laundry are any more private than the ones we’ve provided.
Yes, the 3 y.o. has seen dead animals at the side of the road, a dead mouse that her own cat caught in the house. Whether she understands all the implications or not, or if she understands that this happens to people, too, I cannot say. But she remembers everything someone says.
This might sound weird, but you might try to consult a vet for a prescription of Prozac for cats. My mom’s cat had a very similar problem and the 'script stopped it cold. When the cat misses doses she starts right back up again, so it seems like the meds really are what’s doing the job.
Don’t lie (what will you do if she begins to pester you relentlessly about going to visit the cat, or how is the cat doing, or have you heard from the new owners about the cat, or do you think the cat misses her?), but definitely don’t tell her that you put the cat down because he was peeing everywhere. You can say that he was sick, and there wasn’t anything the doctors could do to make him better even though they really tried, you can even fudge the numbers and say he was really old for a cat, but leave the pee out of the conversation. I doubt she’ll make the connection, but if she does it’s very easy to downplay that aspect. “Well, yes, he did pee on the table a lot, but those were accidents, and it might have been because he was already sick. But the important thing is he doesn’t hurt anymore.”
When my former stepdaughter was about your granddaughter’s age, just before toilet training, she watched my former husband rub a puppy’s nose in a pool of its pee when it went on the carpet (I know, I know). A few weeks later, she had one of those diaper accidents (blowout), and ended up peeing on the carpet. She SCREAMED for several hours, refusing to let anyone near her, because she was utterly convinced that she was going to get her nose rubbed in the pee. She had a repeat of the situation almost a year later when the same thing happened to her younger brother- she actually grabbed him and hid him behind her, crying and begging that mommy and daddy not rub his nose in the pee. She still remembers that, too- and it’s 25 years later. It’s AMAZING sometimes what they retain and how they associate things.
I hope you can find a solution that doesn’t involve putting the cat down- maybe contacting local stables and seeing if they need a barn cat?
There aren’t really any stables nearby, and I can’t imagine anyone “needs” a barn cat. So many perfectly healthy cats and kittens are available, that it almost seems a shame to take up a home that might otherwise go to rescue a healthy cat.
This guy is himself a rescue, so I guess we’ve given him a comfortable life that he might not have had at all.
I may ask the vet tomorrow if a Prozac of some sort would help. It’s not like he’s scampering around the house, though. It’d be a hell of a job to get him to take it, though. He may be middle-aged, but he’s strong.
Ah, yes, knowing about the other boxes and your attempts so far helps shed a different light on the circumstance. I have also seen some success with the drug buspirone (anti-anxiety rather than anti-depressive) for cats with inappropriate urination issues. I suppose if you’re willing to deal with things for another month or so to see if a medication might work, why not give it a try. I also understand you gotta do what you gotta do for the health and mental health of the rest of the household.
If he’s an indoor only cat, turn him into an outdoor cat. Before everyone freaks out over this suggestion, remember that the cat will be euthanized next week. He will adapt and continue to be a part of your family, albeit outside, or he will find a new home or possibly die. Cars or coyotes might get him, but letting him live outside is a chance at life. Commute his death sentence.
OP was quite clear there is a feral colony nearby and this cat would be encroaching on their territory. There’s no way death from a territorial attack or disease carried by these cats is preferable to humane euthanasia. Are you seriously saying it would be better to be torn apart by a coyote than euthanized at the vet’s office? What’s wrong with you?
Nice to know you think it’s fine to put out a cat that can’t hunt or effectively defend itself, has no idea how to fight, has no idea how to find shelter. How about before you make a suggestion people might freak out over, you think it through with more than 50 IQ points? These things are not instinctual, they are taught by feral mother cats to their kittens. If kitty didn’t learn that stuff from momma cat and hone those skills through adulthood, he’s going to have life-threatening problems outside. It’s not a chance at life, it’s a guarantee to end up dead through violence or disease. It’s not commuting a death sentence, it’s just making sure he suffers first.
The OP has clearly thought things through, and a kind death after a kind life is the kindest thing they could do if kitty has unfortunate unfixable issues.
She’s three. This is not going to be something she’ll remember later, so lie or tell the truth, whatever. She’s too young to understand death. Just tell her Mr. Whiskers moved to the big city to fight crime and change the subject.
Whether she remembers it when she’s grown, I don’t want it to be traumatic for her NOW. **Bobkitty’s **story of a similarly-aged child rings very true, and if we go down the road we’re thinking of, that’s the explanation I’ll use. Thanks, bobkitty.
There is no way we will ever have a cat of ours outside. I watched two of ours die from feline leukemia. It was horrible. Subsequent cats were able to be vaccinated for that, and one of them caught FIV instead, which was even worse.
We told our almost three year old daughter that the kitty was very sick, we were taking him to the vet and then we told her the kitty died. Absolute truth. She didn’t need to know that we took him to the vet for the purpose of having him euthanized. We let her give the kitty a pet and tell him she loved him before we left or the vet. She was sad, certainly, but it wasn’t traumatic.
You took the cat to a vet about it’s peeing (potentially harmful - Toxoplasmosis anyone?) stuff all over your house, where your 3 year old child lives, and the vet said his friend needed a mouser for their dairy farm. You met the farm owners (Mr & Mrs Thomson) who had just lost theirs and who immediately bonded with Skippy. They said their farm in [very distant state] would be ideal, forgot to exchange emails or phone numbers etc. You could produce a fuzzy pic of a similar cat on a farm in a year or so if you really want to continue the charade.
Also the cat was actually 6 years old, so if your daughter is still peeing on the floor at 6 she will be sent to be a mouser on a farm
You missed the point, one I should have made more clearly. Nowhere did I suggest abandoning this cat. I suggested he become an outdoor kitty. That means he still lives at the home, is fed at the home, plays with the kids at the home, just not inside the house. Many, many cats live this way, coming into the house to visit, not sleep. It can have shelter in the garage.
From a kill shelter or no-kill shelter? Every no-kill rescue shelter I’ve dealt with has you sign an agreement stating you’ll return the animal if it doesn’t work out.
