My pal has a cat she’s had for 12+ years who now has diabetes and probable kidney disease. Kitty is on special dry food with a teaspoon of wet food, no meds. Kitty has good appetite and drinks water too. Kitty has 5-8 pudding-consistency bowel movements a day and only about 2 will be in the litter pan. The rest will be on the floor in front of the pan and occasionally in the adjoining kitchen. Pal and hubby have a toddler and a five year old and hubby is getting pissed off at the amount of time they both spend cleaning up after Kitty. Hubby wants Kitty put down this week.
HELP!!
I don’t understand. What do you want help with? Advice on how to put the cat down humanely?
Given the information provided, I think putting the cat to sleep makes a lot of sense. I do have sympathy for not wanting to let go of a beloved pet, especially just because it isn’t convenient anymore. On the other hand, given the ages of the children, and the general health of the cat, I’m assuming things aren’t likely to get better. So put the cat to sleep, probably this week, take some time to mourn, and take some time to enjoy only having to clean up after the children, who can be trained, before starting to think about acquiring a kitten or new adult cat.
This doesn’t sound like a condition that’s going to get better, in fact it will probably just worsen. Is the cat in any pain?
I think the humane thing to do is put it down. It’s really not fair to make the whole house suffer because of a condition that’s not going to get any better. The cat has lived a long life.
Help with advice about the situation in general; Pal and hubby have another cat who’s just as old but doesn’t make messes and is somewhat healthier.
Both cats were fine until this past spring when Hubby brought home friend’s cat when friend had to move suddenly. Old Cats didn’t accept New Cat, litter pan issues commenced and after a couple of months New cat was taken to the pound. Old Kitty was never the same.
Pal is a couple doors down from me in another office, occasionally breaking into quiet crying while trying to work which I see when I walk by; breaks my heart all around for all involved.
Why must we love our pets so much?? 
If your pal doesn’t want to have her cat put down – and it doesn’t sound like the cat is in pain, just not using the litterbox inappropriately, probably because it can’t control its bowel movements – then she needs to grow a spine and tell her husband to back off. If he doesn’t want to clean up after the cat, then she needs to take that on, of course. Sounds like Hubby was the cause of the problem when he brought home the new cat.
She should at least consult with the vet on the life expectancy of her cat before she gives in to her hub’s demands because he doesn’t want to clean up poop anymore, jeez.
I’d say she should stand up to the hubby, BUT, there are young children in the house and they could possibly run into the poop first and maybe do something toddlers tend to do when they find stuff on the floor.
If it were me, the child would come first, even though it would be heartbreaking to let a pet go.
Dealing with grief and loss is the worst aspect of pet ownership. Unfortunately, it is a necessary aspect, as pets tend to have much shorter lifespans than humans.
The difficulty here is that it isn’t clear whether the decision to put the cat down is mutually agreed on between the two owners.
If it is the case that one wants to and the other doesn’t, that’s a very basic problem in their relationship - if hubby is basically calling the shots regardless of her feelings in the matter.
On the other hand, it could be that pal is simply heartbroken over a decision she also regards as inevitable.
This is one mess I’d be wary of treading in, though. Such decisions are very intensely personal and pal may not take kindly to advice.
My recommendation would be to check with the veterinarian to make sure they are informed about the medical facts.
If there isn’t a medical solution, it might be possible to have the cat live in one room of the house, with occasional supervised playtime. Sometime an older cat is fine with this. Our older cat’s daily agenda is about 22 hours of sleep, with the rest of the time devoted to eating, litter, a few snuggles, and a nap. She likes having her room and a low stress lifestyle.
I agree that random cat poo and young kids can’t be allowed to continue to mix.
Maybe someone else would be willing to adopt the cat. It seems like there must be a better solution than killing the cat because it’s incontinent.
Hubby does accept the blame for bringing New Cat home and starting the whole mess, but it doesn’t undo his resolve to get rid of Kitty. He works from home so cleans up more messes than she does, whilst taking care of the kids while he works.
As far as they can tell, Kitty isn’t in pain, but I think it must hurt her somewhat when she has the diarrhea; I know it hurts when I do. I read up on it and seee that it’s a common side effect of uremia, which the vet says she has. Kitty is less friendly than she used to be; since New Cat came, the three cats were sequestered in the kitchen/laundry room/bathroom area and have remained there. They only get attention when the people are in those rooms and have gotten needy and sullen. If Kitty wasn’t making messes, they could roam the house with no problem. So, Kitty being put down is good for other kitty, too.
The only advice I’ve given has been to have the vet give Kitty a thorough going-over before they finally decide to euthanize; Pal’s hubby doesn’t want to throw good money after bad.
ETA - Thank you all for seeing that this is a painful thing for my friend; sure “it’s just a cat”, but … it could someday be our animal.
Is there anyway they can set up another litter box? If the cat is going twice in the box and then going on the floor it sounds to me like the cat likes a clean box. If they have two or more clean boxes the kitty might use those when the main box gets dirty.
I also think I would get the cat to the vet. Since the kitty is on a special diet I can only assume the cat has been to the vet at least once about the diabetic issue. Can they take the cat back and let the vet know about this new problem? At least get more information before they put the cat down.
Twelve is getting sort of old for a cat but I have known cats to live a lot longer than that.
poor kitty.
I adore cats, and hate the idea of putting them down, but unless someone is willing to take on an older cat with litter-box issues, I’d say putting the cat down is the right thing to do. I feel for your friend very much.
Uremia is not a fun condition to have - ask someone on kidney dialysis. I’m not sure your friend is doing the cat any favors by prolonging its life.
However, I can see how it seems petty and mean to put an animal to sleep just because it misses the litter box.
Something your friend might try - buy a large Rubbermaid storage container. Something on the order of 3 ft X 2 ft X 2 ft. Using a box cutter, cut a cat sized hole on one end - about 2-3 inches above the ground so cat has to step into the box to get inside it. Place the litter pan inside the large Rubbermaid box. You may find that cat’s misses are contained inside the Rubbermaid box - away from kids and easy to clean.
The vet appointment is this Friday.
To put the cat down or to try to get to the, um, bottom of the medical problem?
Since she won’t talk about it w/o welling up tears, I’m guessing put down, but I hope she’ll ask for their advice first. Then she will have to weigh what their advised treatment costs against what she and Hubby can afford.
i have a cat with tummy troubles. it is not a wonderful situation.
malenka does have pain when she “goes” and sometimes when she “goes” it is very explosive and unexpected. she is unable to get to a litter box, and has learned that litter box = pain.
i do go back and forth on whether to let her pass on, or to keep trying meds and foods. she is 6 years old now. i’m thinking as long as she has more good days than bad; i can deal with the clean up. i don’t have kids or a spouse, so it is easier.
the hardwood floors… they aren’t happy at all, and have mostly bad days and nights.
Not much to say that hasn’t already been said - I feel for your friend because that is such a hard decision to make.
I feel for your friend, too, but IMO the bottom line is that children can get toxoplasmosis. Generally when you have kids and a cat, you teach the kids to stay away from the litter box, and if you have toddlers, you put the litter box where the toddler can’t get at it until he’s old enough to understand “don’t touch, poo is icky”.
But two small children, a cat with incurable diarrhea, and a dad who may be too busy working at the moment to intercept Junior when he decides to paddle in Kitty’s mess? Nuh-uh. Kitty would have to go. Sorry.