After you have finished wondering why you ever wanted the job, what do you actually do? I cannot imagine what I would do but some of you might feel you do.
I would be sorely tempted to send a missile to Moscow, but that would lead to a nuclear holocaust.
There is no satisfactory answer to this question. Not only is that consequence terrible to contemplate but it opens up a world in which nuclear weapons are no longer considered a deterrent but a weapon considered for battlefield use in a time when the world should really be focusing on other existential threats.
Stranger
Skipping past the steps where I pinch myself repeatedly hoping it’s a dream, followed by the vomiting, I contact our reps in China and India and say “Are you with me NOW?”
If yes, the next day Putin and Russia are in a situation that makes N.Korea look like a popular kid at school who hands out $20’s to his fellow students every week.
Otherwise… well, no, I don’t send a missile to Moscow, but I contact the rest of the NATO heads and say time to invite Ukraine - and prepare to ship everything on Z’s wish list. I can’t stop Putin from going for MAD anyway, but there’s no longer any reason to fear the worst - it’s here anyway.
Putin would not do that because he sees Kyiv as the ancient heart of Russia.
More plausibly, he may order a nuclear strike against a Ukrainian military base or large mass of troops.
Perhaps NATO leadership would call Xi, who would be genuinely appalled, seeking to have him tell his friend Vladimir that he went too far, ordering Putin, on the authority of all significant world powers, into something approaching house arrest.
But this next link gives a pretty convincing argument that Xi won’t agree to ally with us no matter how badly Putin behaves:
The worse things go for Putin in Ukraine, the more China will back him
What then?
No good choices.
Maybe we’ll try for NATO to defeat Russia with a full-scale conventional attack, threatening that next time he used nuclear weapons, we will match what he did.
A massive nuclear war, a new Middle Ages begun when the West gives up, and a new birth of freedom are all possible.
If I’m President, and I decide that nuking Russia is the thing to do, I don’t send one nuke. I send all of the nukes. I assume we have good intel on Russia’s nuke launching locations, and we hit them all, and then some. The only hope at that point is that I, as President, prevent Russia from nuking us. And I do that by launching ALL of the nukes.
Full nuclear assault with the intent of decapitating the Russian government and destroying its ability to retaliate to the extent possible, while preparing for massive casualties as the result of an inevitable counterattack.
I agree and would also add I am unaware we have any defense against Russia’s hypersonic missiles.
Russia still has nuclear submarines, well hidden under the sea and packed with MIRVs, right? And a lot of medium range missiles for the European cities, the stuff we protested against when the USA deployed Pershings in Western Europe to counter the threat of SS-20s, so that Russia deployed even more SS-20 (remember Reagan? NATO’s Double-Track-Decision?). That was what we feared. It has taken longer than we thought. Hell, we are not even quite there yet. But coming asymptotically closer and closer
I would not rule out the chance to preserve a nucleus of human specimens. It would be quite easy… at the bottom of some of our deeper mineshafts. The radioactivity would never penetrate a mine some thousands of feet deep. And in a matter of weeks, sufficient improvements in dwelling space could easily be provided. Nuclear reactors could provide power almost indefinitely. Greenhouses could maintain plant life. Animals could be bred and slaughtered. A quick survey would have to be made of all the available mine sites in the country. A computer could be set and programmed to accept factors from youth, health, sexual fertility, intelligence, and a cross section of necessary skills. Of course it would be absolutely vital that our top government and military men be included to foster and impart the required principles of leadership and tradition. Naturally, they would breed prodigiously. There would be much time, and little to do. But with the proper breeding techniques and a ratio of say, ten females to each male, I would guess that they could then work their way back to the present gross national product within say, twenty years.
I would go full Tom Clancy mode.
Step one, notify Israel and all other Allies that WWIII has begun and to prepare defensive military measures and be ready for full scale conventional war (or worse!)
F-15’s armed with anti-satellite missiles take out ALL Russian satellites within moments of each other. Tell China that nuclear experts are going to visit all of your nuclear sites to ensure they are not launched in any direction whatsoever. Explain, you are on board with humankind – or you are onboard with Putin, no middle ground. Nukes are too important a weapon to leave to everyone’s honor – the G7 will be calling all nuclear shots from here until cease of hostilities and NO ONE is launching under any circumstances. (Not sure how to do this but getting buy-in from China can keep this from being complete human annihilation.)
Conventionally armed Cruise Missiles are targeted on every single fixed Russian nuclear launch facility but not launched. Yet. Every Russian boomer is sunk while docked – warn them first so there need not be any loss of life, but before any can put to sea take them out. Any that are at sea are likely known- let them know they must surrender or die. No other options!
I would imagine those mobile ICBM rigs that Dan Aykroyd and Chevy Chase took out in Spies Like Us are being tracked quite diligently right now. Those are tracked relentlessly and if one starts to set up for launch it gets bombed heavily.
F-117 and F-16 come into Russia low and fast to perform Wild Weasel functions about Two-Hundred miles behind high flying drones fitted with IFF pods which say they are high altitude bombers. I hate to risk the highly valuable F22’s, so at the most half of them can be in the clean-up position behind these efforts. I would use the Multi-role F-35 that are supposed to have been upgraded and various F-15’s and F-16’s to shoot down anything that flies over Russia. And A-10’s can blast the shit out of anything on the ground which poses any threat.
Just before this shit hits the fan, call Putin and tell him he has twenty minutes to surrender himself and the entire Russian military brass or have a missile launched up his ass. Assure him that the satellites that were “removed from service” four hours ago would be informing him that the Kremlin and most of Moscow will be a glowing orange ball of flame if he moves one finger to launch another nuke – Strategic or Tactical. At Twenty-Two minutes after notification, if Russian TV is not showing Putin and whatever they call their Joint Chiefs waving white flags and singing Yankee Doodle Dandy, hit all static and movable nuclear launch sites with enough conventional firepower to make them inoperable but not to detonate them.
All Russian ships are given the choice to surrender – or be sunk. Well, all the ones that can pose any danger to anyone. In the mean time, most of our boomers can move into firing position around Russia just in case. NATO ground forces can march right through Ukraine pausing long enough to support the grandma’s that are fighting off Russians on their way to Russian soil.
Say a week or two to establish air superiority, a full month to seize all command and control along with state run media. Two more months to mop up outlying conventional military sites and start inspecting and dismantling nuclear sites. That is a two year operation-- but done under very strict NATO control from start to finish leaving ZERO nuclear capability, ZERO neurological or any other form of weapon of mass destruction. They are allowed to have a standing army about half of what is necessary for strictly defensive warfare with no reserve units or any other work around, and a guarantee of security from the EU, the US, and NATO (China can join the bandwagon if they want.)
Once NATO commanders are drinking in the Russian Officer’s Club in every Russian military installation, we can ask. Do you people have a potential ruler who can work and play well with others? Do you want to have a non-military leader who is more concerned with relationships and community?? Or would you rather we split up your country amongst ourselves???
I imagine our military would wipe the floor with their military in no time flat. But it all depends upon keeping them from launching ANY nuclear (or even conventional) missile at anyone!! I believe it is possible, but it would take great planning and execution – and even then some losses are going to occur.
Then give Japan and Australia twenty year supervision over certain regions until the Russians are “ready” for complete independence. China gets a chunk just for sitting it out-- as long as they leave Taiwan the hell alone. India and Pakistan have a seat at the table as long as they sat out the hostilities. Ukraine of course gets to supervise what we will call “Ukrainian Russia” for at least twenty years and all of NATO will be overseeing the whole ball of wax. At the end of twenty years, a docile Russia will have no striking capacity but is likely to modernize and become good and environmentally friendly neighbors of NATO. They will also have some influences from other cultures that might make them more . . . . . well, less hostile and expansionist.
In other words, once they get their asses kicked, they (like a spoiled child) earn their privileges back only when they show they can handle them.
As far as the ass kicking goes, I recommend a two pronged attack outlined above. The first step is in the Cobra Kai philosophy: STRIKE HARD, STRIKE FAST, NO MERCY SIR! The second phase will be in the Miyagi Do philosophy – no such thing as bad boy, only bad teacher. First we stop them from hurting themselves or others, then we show them how to be good world citizens.
I am actually more familiar with the military capabilities of the 1980’s than I am of today’s US military might. Except of course I have seen the F-22 fly many times and know it is literally a great plane and know enough about the F-35 to know it is NOT a great platform to do anything (but we have lots of them – so what the hell, use them as SAM fodder). The above is all best case scenario and far too ideal to be true, but…
With excellent planning, use of cyber warfare [by us, the US and NATO], taking out their satellites before they know it is happening, and flawless execution-- would it be possible to limit Russia to only conventional responses?? Is it even possible to incapacitate their launch facilities?? If so, is it possible to do so without having accidental detonation?? Of course all preparations can be made (or try to be made) around the globe. If you thought getting PPE was a problem during COVID, just wait until Global Thermonuclear War is on the table!
No one can win a nuclear exchange. Everyone loses and the most likely outcome is the end of all civilization and most of mankind (along with many other species). We can however win a conventional war if we can stop Putin from launching a single strategic missile. Seeing how inept the Russian military is, I think we could take Russia in less time than it has taken them to insure defeat for themselves in Ukraine.
Have you learned NOTHING from Matthew Broderick?? The only winning move is not to play the game. Unless you take out all of their satellites first, and all other launch detection capabilities, a launch guarantees a full retaliatory strike. And then China still has all of their nukes (as do France and England and India, etc., etc.) and we are empty and under direct attack. Worst possible move in my opinion.
These are launched from tactical aircraft. Establish air superiority and eventually establish a no fly zone and these particular weapons are undeliverable. But they do have very capable land launched missiles that would need to be neutralized also. Which only matters if we can keep things conventional because any strategic launch means at least a million dead and dying plus whatever infrastructure they take out.
My understanding is that they keep those very close to home and do not let them wander very often or very far. They are afraid Sean Connery is going steal one of their “boomer” subs if they let them sail too often. They are usually home being lovingly cared for at the shipyard, and when they are out for a cruise-- we know exactly where they are.
If it goes full nuclear – everyone loses. Even those who have no country or nation to call home. If it stays conventional, only Russia loses unless China (or any other nuclear power) decides to jump into the fire.
I know I do not know enough to be completely correct, what did I overlook and/or get wrong?
I must confess, you have an astonishingly good idea there, Doctor.
If they wanted them, I would give the Ukraine tactical nuclear weapons to fire back at the Russian forces invading their country. Assuming it did not escalate into the third and final world war, I would also start deploying tactical nuclear weapons as part of NATO’s defense in Europe.
I would not use nuclear weapons of any kind…yet. However, I would send US forces into Ukraine en masse and warn Russia that any use of Russian nukes on them will result in nuclear retaliation.
Then, threaten China with Russia-like sanctions if it continues to provide any support to Russia in contravention of sanctions.
Then, lobby the UN to kick Russia out of the Security Council, maybe even the UN itself.
I would inform every nation on Earth that they can conduct business with either the US or Russia, but not both. If China or any other country so much as buys a can of Russian caviar, they are no longer allowed to do any business with any American entity.
Your plan is pretty absurd I’m afraid. There’s no way a conventional counter-force strike would ever be a practical option. As you describe it, it would happen at such a slow pace that Russia would get off at least 95% of its nuclear forces and would be basically compelled to do so by the attack on its nuclear forces. Cruise missiles and jets move way too slow to take out nuclear forces, and without nukes themselves, they lack what you would need to attack hardened nuclear facilities. You’re also dramatically overestimating the range of the weapon systems you’re talking about and their ability to penetrate deep into the country of Russia.
The only practical counter-force strike that would be even moderately successful would have to be a well-prepared, relatively unexpected nuclear strike. No one would ever try what you suggest, not in a million years.
Also, detonating nuclear weapons during conventional attacks is not a concern at all. Not only would it not happen - nuclear weapons can only do their job if a whole lot of delicate and complex engineering goes right - you can’t cause a nuclear explosion by hitting something with a hammer or even blowing it up - having a nuclear explosion at an enemy nuclear weapons site is not something anyone is going to care about avoiding, both because it’s worth it to ensure that nuke isn’t used against you, and because nuclear weapon sites are by nature out in the middle of nowhere.
I don’t think you know how nuclear reactors operate (though I have a suspicion about the inspiration of your proposal, I liked the movie too), but whatever: count me out. I’ll let everybody in, and I mean everybody, before I go that route.
What a bizarre tale of weapons fetishism. But then it gets better and turns into an allmighty fantasy! Do you really believe Fox News and tanTrump and China and the ones adicted to social media would play along? Ah! And I miss some AI and machine learning thrown in for good measure.
Russia would veto that move. Because they can. You would too, if you were in their place. Might as well abolish the UN (wait a minute… who suggested that? Oh, yes! A very stable genius!)
If they start lobbing missiles at us, we take the smallest one we’ve got, put it on a truck and drive it down to Mar-A-Lago. Hey, don’t let a crisis go to waste.
“Now, wouldn’t that necessitate the abandonment of the so-called monogamous sexual relationship, I mean, as far as men were concerned?”
A general nuclear war would be a bad thing. And as President, I would try to avoid that.
We do not have a treaty with Ukraine obligating us to attack Russia. So I would not respond to a Russian nuclear attack against Ukraine with an American nuclear attack against Russia.
I would condemn the Russian attack and call for an international repudiation of Russia backed up with the hardest sanctions the world can impose. I would tell Russia that it will suffer under these sanctions until they fulfill these conditions;
something very un-presidential.
-send all the troops/material Selensky wants/needs (that’s par for the course now)
Now THAT should get the russian juices flowing … (for added drama, a James Bond type live-cam on a countdown-counter on a nuke-silo)
ETA: while secretly flying to Patagonia o NZ