Important E-Mail Warning! Please Forward!

[shelbo]

I just received this urgent e-mail, and wanted to warn all Dopers of the impending threat. It really is a scary time.

Don’t go to the bathroom on October 28th! Or if you do, don’t do number two!

CIA intelligence reports that a major terrorist plot is planned for that day. Anyone who takes a poop on the 28th will be bitten on the ass by an alligator. Reports indicate that organized groups of terrorists are planting alligators unsuspecting American’s toilet bowls to bite them when they are doing their dirty business.

I usually don’t send emails like this, but I got this information from a reliable source. It came from a friend of a friend whose cousin is dating this girl whose brother knows this guy whose wife knows this lady whose husband buys hotdogs from this guy who knows a shoeshine guy who shines the shoes of a mailroom worker who has a friend who’s drug dealer who sells drugs to another mailroom worker who works in the CIA building.

He apparently overheard two guys talking in the bathroom about alligators and came to the conclusion that we are going to be attacked. So it must be true.

Be careful out there.

[screech-owl]

Shouldn’t your last line read: “Be careful down there”?

[pezpunk]

Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the bathroom…

[glee]

Don’t tell me you’ve fallen for this load of rubbish.

Everyone knows they’re using crocodiles, not alligators…

[NotWithoutRage]

Poop.

[Wump]

Maybe we should call the crocodile hunter… get him to deal with our toilets.

[beagledave]

Fuck 'em. I’m prepared.

[Kricket]

Wump you wouldn’t happen to have that number would you?

But on a good note, I can tell the kids that maybe those crocodiles will eat the mouse that my husband flushed a few days ago, and convinced my four year old daughter that it wasn’t safe to use the potty anymore.

[toshirodragon]

Kricket, PLEASE DON"T tell my 5 year old boy! He will insist I rescue the reptile and give it a good home!

[Sylkyn]

Y’know…the really sad part about this is that I could send this warning to several friends of mine, and they would all promptly go into cardiac arrest.

Then forward it to everyone they have ever known.

Including me.

[toshirodragon]

Oh jeez I didnt think of that Silky! I better check my email… she should be checking in any minute now!

[Finagle]

*Originally posted by glee *
**Don’t tell me you’ve fallen for this load of rubbish.

Everyone knows they’re using crocodiles, not alligators… **

So that would make this warning a croc of shit?

[screech-owl]

There’s always this.

[Barbarian]

I want a bog monster!