So now the FBI tells us there’s probably going to be a “Spectacular” terrorist attack soon. Well, that’s fucking helpful. I feel real prepared now.
Mr. Singular is traveling across the country to visit his elderly father for Thanksgiving, and I get to sit here and gnaw my fucking nails down to the second knuckle worrying if he’s going to make it home. Up till now, I was merely apprehensive about this trip. Now I’m fucking terrified. And I can’t do a goddam thing about it.
The real irony? I can’t go because I’ll be working on the flight deck door modifications, designing them to thwart the fucking terrorists.
I’m gonna stock up on Rebel Yell for the duration-passing out might be the only rest I’ll get.
Spectacular! Coming soon! 'Terrorists On Ice"
Yes, a spectacular attack. “Despite a lack of a specific target or specific credible evidence” (that’s a quote from KFWB All News Radio), we are to be on extra alert.
Thanks, guys, but I’ve alrady met my alertness limit.
Sounds like fireworks will be involved.
A Spectacular spectacular.
I’m waiting for a double plus bad attack. Then I’m really gonna worry.
“Spectacular” is the (macabre) word applied to any large act of terrorism. IIRC the IRA used it to describe anything big in England - mainly bombs - distinguised from other stuff like launching mortars or shooting people.
Yeah, I saw that item, too: “The FBI has determined that there are still three or four US citizens who still have crap and/or bejesus in them, so they have issued a new useless but menacing warning to scare it out.”
Just how freaking alert are we supposed to be anyway? Should I start popping uppers and swilling Mt.Dew 24 hours a day? Should I set my alarm clock to go off every five minutes? Should I pay a dwarf to whack me in the shins if I yawn? Should I hook wires up to my testicles that zap me with a 1000 volts if I nod off for a second?
Well, my weekend is planned.
What were we talking about?
Will Phyllis Diller make an appearance? With special guest Donnie Osmond?
ATTACK! - The Spectacular
That would be terrorism.
Or valium, perhaps?
Yummy! Give me two of the blue ones
80% “fresh” on Rottentomatoes.com
Osama bin-TASTIC!!
-Gene Shalit
Taliban-TABULOUS!!
-Rex Reed
I laughed. I died!!
- Leonard Maltin
Two thumbs cut off!!
-Ebert and Roper
The year’s biggest disappointment. Overblown effects cannot make up for lack of plot, one dimnsional characters…
-Newsweek
So what color alert has Tom Ridge decreed for this weekend?
If you don’t hire a dwarf to whack you in the shins, the terrorists will have already won.
Eleusis sez
That’s what I’ll be washing down with the Rebel Yell, I guess…
Like Tina Fey said-
Bitch, I can’t be more alert!
That’s what we get for saying “I double-dog dare you!” to Al-Qaida.
When will we ever learn. :smack:
This one’s good. This one is very good.
my own contribution:
[Entertainment Tonight] Up next, the Spectacular Terrorist Attack! ET goes behind the camera to see who, and what, has everyone in Hollywood talking about not leaving the house! Stay tuned![/Entertainment Tonight]
Alert condition:
Yellow
So we should all just be pissing ourselves then?
It’s fucking ridiculous.
(And I can’t even hear the words “Homeland security” with a straight face. What the fuck has the Dept of Defense been doing all this time then? Someone needs to buy these guys a Thesaurus.)
The DoD is busy “defending” the other hundred-and-something nations where our military is stationed.
- that was my sig for a while.
- I think I actually wet my pants when she said that on the news
