In which I pit another stupid advertising trend.

[athelas]

The pervasive use of sentence fragments. By advertisements. It’s annoying. Pretentious. And shows a low regard for the intelligence of the consumer. The pervasive use sentence fragments. Yet another idiotic idea from the world of advertising.

[tdn]

Examples?

[Huerta88]

I see this all the time. In fundraising letters I get. From various causes. They clearly have been talking. Talking to “marketing experts.” Who’ve told them this style is more “punchy” or “conversational.”

[hijack]Fundraising letters remind me of my own least favorite trend: The inevitable non-postscript P.S. EVERY fundraising solicitation today contains a paragraph-long P.S. How would you have a P.S. in a carefully composed, pre-printed letter? P.S. is what you write when you’ve had an impromptu thought after writing in stream of consciousness. And, it’s usually about a tangential issue, not about the EXACT FREAKING ISSUE just discussed for three pages. “P.S. Orphans are starving in India. But your contribution can really make a difference. Please give your most generous donation in the enclosed envelope.” Well, you fucking moron, if I am too stupid to have figured out that that’s what you wanted from the six times you said it in the body of the letter, why would I get the hint from the bogus postscript?[/hijack]

[OneCentStamp]

@athelas

The pervasive use of sentence fragments. By advertisements. It’s annoying. Pretentious. And shows a low regard for the intelligence of the consumer. The pervasive use sentence fragments. Yet another idiotic idea from the world of advertising.

Apparently you aren’t a fan of the William Shatner Institute of Ad Copy Writing.

[Ludovic]

I agree. It’s a real. Stupid. Trend.

[magellan01]

@athelas

The pervasive use of sentence fragments. By advertisements. It’s annoying. Pretentious. And shows a low regard for the intelligence of the consumer. The pervasive use sentence fragments. Yet another idiotic idea from the world of advertising.

Of. Use of sentence fragments.

Good old Gaudere.

[Lemur866]

@bird tuner

I am a full fledged marketing weasel…

You mean mink.

[Smeghead]

@bird tuner

I am a full fledged marketing weasel (a term of endearment that I cherish) of long standing.

We got one, folks! Grab the torches and pitchforks!

[WhyNot]

bird tuner, I think I heart you. Please join our board. Thank you.

P.S. Pay for membership, mm’kay?

[SisterCoyote]

I’m sorry, but are there any intelligent advertising trends?

[Left_Hand_of_Dorkness]

@SisterCoyote

I’m sorry, but are there any intelligent advertising trends?

In 1998, I worked briefly writing material for marketing products on the INternet (I’ve been doing penance ever since). One of the quotes that stood out in my mind was:

Marketing works best in an information-impoverished environment.

Doesn’t that make your blood run cold? it’s like something Dr. Evil would say.

But yeah: marketing trends aren’t supposed to be intelligent. The dumber the environment, the more effective they are. When you start making your consumer decisions based on reliable, objective, relevant information, the marketer is out of a job.

Daniel

[OneCentStamp]

@Left Hand of Dorkness

When you start making your consumer decisions based on reliable, objective, relevant information, the marketer is out of a job.

Daniel

Probably why so many retail industries (most notably the travel industry, but the auto retail business as well) have been turned on their ass by the rise of the internet. Something about all of that information right at your fingertips.

[Ensign_Edison]

@WhyNot

bird tuner, I think I heart you. Please join our board. Thank you.

P.S. Pay for membership, mm’kay?

I’m with you. If I didn’t know he has stacks of greasy, coke-encrusted hundred dollar bills actually on his desk at work like all ad men, I’d offer to pay for him myself.

[ivylass]

@bird tuner

I must pop in here to clarify a few misconceptions.

I am a full fledged marketing weasel (a term of endearment that I cherish) of long standing. There is absolutely nothing new about writing advertising copy in sentence fragments. Gets attention. Makes the point. Quickly.

Advertising in any form is expensive and offers precious little real estate to work with. You have to make every word count. And with lots of white space. Allows the reader to “breathe.” Creates tension. Focus.

Okay, enough of that. If I actually wrote copy in a form that was grammatically correct and that might have appeared in “The Chicago Manual of Style” to describe the product or service my company offered and subsequently designed an ad, however appealing to the eye, by now you’d have turned the page. Has to do with the natural rhythm of your body. Your breathing. Your attention span. You get the point.

Or do you? Guess what? It works. That’s why you see it so often. And will continue to do so.

And the reason for the phony PS? Most people, faced by three pages of dense type, skip to the end. They just do. If you don’t, you’re an exception. Congratulate yourself. Then get a life. No, what happens is that, if the letter is even glanced at, the reader flips over the pages to wonder “Dang, how long is this thing?” and sees the PS at the bottom. The message in a nutshell is repeated. Repeated. Repetition is a wonderful thing. Just ask Hermann Goering: tell a lie enough times and it becomes the truth.

Sadly, you have only one choice. Get used to it. In a beautiful skyline obliterated by billboards, we must adapt our expectations. Or die. We do it well. That’s why we step on cockroaches—and not the other way around.

I hope you accept this in the manner it was offered and take no offense. As Sir Thomas Browne observed: “A man may be in as just possession of truth as of a city, and yet be forced to surrender.”

Bird

Well, hell, if you’re going to go and educate us and all…might as well join up. (P.S. I’m on the opposite end. I work in broadcasting, where we air the commercials and ad copy that you weasels think up.)

Can I ask one thing? That Bank of America commercial that has no voiceover but just graphics on screen, that’s touting how friendly they are to the blind…exactly how the hell is a blind person supposed to know that if there’s no goat-felching voiceover??? Talk about NOT providing information…

[Left_Hand_of_Dorkness]

@bird tuner

Actually, quite the contrary, Daniel. We all love to make fun of the used car salesman with his slick patter and even slicker suit. But when consumers are informed, that’s precisely when you need good marketing. When business is off, you hire salespeople; when the product flat lines, you get the message out. And you do it intelligently because that demographic has necessarily become more intelligent. When you have an “information-impoverished environment” doesn’t it stand to reason that the sale is going to be easier? If you’re talking to monkeys, do you need to hire anything more than a monkey to sell bananas?

You’re absolutely right on the dynamic, and absolutely wrong on the quote.

Yes: the less information is out there, the easier it is to persuade someone to do what you want, the easier your sale will be. That’s because that’s the environment in which your marketing message works best. The more informed people are, the less effective your marketing tool will be; that means your marketing tool will have to be really, really good if you want it to be effective.

But yeah, come aboard–I may quibble with you, but eloquent posters are always welcome!

Daniel

[Left_Hand_of_Dorkness]

@bird tuner

We are, I think, agreeing in different words, Daniel. My (obviously inarticulate) point was that marketing in an information-rich environment must necessarily be more intelligent because the audience now has the ability to peek at the little man behind the curtain and say “Bah!” It’s no longer enough to simply appeal to false authority (“Everyone’s using Tide! Shouldn’t you?”) and call it a day. Advertising is just too expensive to take for granted, so we really do the math before we pull the trigger. (Wow, now there’s a mixed metaphor for you.)

Yeah, we do agree. I’m saying that a marketer ought to prefer to work in an information-impoverished environment, since a little marketing goes a long way in such an environment. That idea has some sinister implications for the mass media, IMO: advertisers ought to be more willing to support shows that ignorant people are watching, and less willing to support shows that encourage critical thought and savvy consumerism.

Daniel

[Ensign_Edison]

@bird tuner

I doubt I’ll be staying, but thank you kindly for the offer. I do not possess the rapier wit nor the steely nerves required for the job. But you soldier on; it was a pleasure to speak with you. As Umberto Eco said, “Nothing gives a man more courage than another man’s fear.”

Bird

…You’re not also a nihilistic psychologist by any chance, are you?

[WhyNot]

Damn. Looks like I got socked right in the heart. Le sigh.

[pizzabrat]

My favorite part was reading this entire thread, for the first time, with BANNED underneath bird turner’s name.

[ivylass]

Well, hell. What happened? I log on looking for more pearls of wisdom from bird tuner, and I find he’s been banned.