In which Ivorybill invokes the stress fairy...

The BBQ Pit
1

Dear Erin,

I hope you have a lovely time at the beach. Really. Not only this weekend (the trip that came up so suddenly) but also the trip the week after (which you told us would be at the end of August). It’s a good time to be going to the beach. After all, New Orleans is, well, HOT right now. (But hey, it’s a humid heat.)

While you’re having a lovely time, we, of course, will miss you. Really. Remember us? The people who interviewed you in May about helping my wife look after our children this summer? Remember the part where you assured us you’d be able to work all of July? Absolutely guaranteed?

Remember why we were so insistent on July? Really? Recall that it was due to the fact that my wife would be delivering our fourth child around July 7th? Well, you know he came four days early. You also know he’ll likley head in for surgery next week to remove his floating thumb ( http://www.medmedia.com/o15/105.htm ). Well, despite our concerns about our infant’s condition, we were relieved that at least we wouldn’t have to worry about finding care for our three older ones. Oops.

But hey! You were invited to go to the beach! Not once, but twice! This is your last summer as a college student! You really deserve some time off before you, too head down the road of life.

Well, as a 35 year old man with a daughter 1/3 your age, I’m somewhat hesitant to give you both barrells of my ire, so here’s one.

I hope that after your lovely trips to the beach that you are visited by the stress fairy. Once for each tear our daughter shed this morning when we told her you wouldn’t be coming any longer and couldn’t finish reading Ramona to her. Once for each tear my wife shed last night worrying how she was going to care for an infant and three children while I’m at work. Once for each time our two year old has to wait for mama to finish nursing the baby before he gets some comfort. Once for each hour of vacation time I’ll have to burn juggling my schedule to help my wife (hours that our family won’t get to spend at the coast this August).

May the stress visited upon you delay your graduation; deny you the job you really wanted; break up the relationship with the really great guy who has it all together; send your sitter packing when you need her the most; and cause other mishaps that only the genius of the stress fairy can devise.

Oh, I almost forgot. We kept the list of references you gave us at your interview. We’ll be calling them.

Be sure to pack some sunscreen!

2

First, congratulations on the birth of your baby, and I hope you all make out well with his surgery.

Second, I hope you send this woman a letter stating exactly what you wrote to us (minus the wishing her a shitty life stuff). She did you very wrong and should hear about it in a real, painful way. She is old enough to honor commitments.

I would also call her references, particularly if she happened to have listed her parents as a reference.

What an irresponsible boob. If I were in your town, I would come help your wife, I feel so bad about your situation.

Hang in there, and hopefully you’ll find someone more responsible to help out.

Zette

3

I really appreciate your comments, Zette, as well as the virtual offer for help. Luckily for us, we’ve some really great kids and a fairly decent-sized support network. All Mrs. Ivorybill needs to do is pick up the phone and she can have me or one of our friends at the house within 20 minutes.

And, FWIW, the new baby is doing great. He’s a good sleeper, so we’re not overly sleep deprived in addition to everything else.

I’ve calmed down a little bit over the course of the day, but am still upset that this young woman has not only blown us off, but has done so with so much distain. Mrs. Ivorybill says that the sitter appears confident that there will be no consequences for her actions. We have no desire to be vindictive, but we will make sure that the people she has used as character references in the past hear about this little episode.

4

If it’s any consolation, here’s the Word from a forty-something who has a daughter nearly Erin’s age:

It WILL catch up with her. That lack of prioritizing skills WILL sneak up and bite her on the kneecap when she’s least expecting it. Oh, she won’t remember the time she stood you up–the Ivorybills will be long since off her personal radar. No, it’ll be something else. She’ll decide to go to the beach instead of to that boring professional seminar (“Oh, I know all that stuff anyway, and it’s just a bunch of lectures”). Or she’ll choose the weekend in Paris with the hottie from Sales instead of working the weekend to get the report ready with the rest of her team (“It’s a once in a lifetime experience, guys! Thanks, I knew you’d understand…”)

And then the Stress Fairy will definitely visit her, when she discovers that the MegaAmericanSupremo Corporation was hiring at the seminar, and her skills were exactly what they were looking for, but oops! she wasn’t there. And she will be talking to the Stress Fairy when everybody who spent the weekend working on the report gets a pat on the back from the Boss–except for Erin, who was “out of town”.

And when, instead of responding to her SO’s phone call of “I really need to talk to you right now” by going over there immediately, she tells him, “Well, I have to run a few errands first, I’ll be over there in a while”, and she finds that he’s packed and gone by the time she gets there, she’ll discover that the Stress Fairy is good company indeed. They could play cards.

5

Duck Duck Goose speaks many words of wisdom, but that last post was a real pearl. It’ll catch up with her eventually.

In the meantime, I wish you and your family all the best with the tough time ahead. Take advantage of that good support network you have. Again, all my best with your brand new baby :slight_smile:

Fran

6

Perhaps we’re now breaking pitiquette with all these warm fuzzies, but I’d like to take the opportunity to thank DDG and Francesca for their kind comments. You’re right: it will catch up with her in the long run.

Mrs. Ivorybill and I were discussing things last night (she had a great day, BTW, and the baby was up only twice last night and slept in past seven this morning). We’ve decided to use the money we’re now not spending on the sitter to splurge on some activities for the kids that we were planning to defer until the fall. This morning, I made everybody blueberry pancakes before taking the bigger kids to their summer reading camp. We’ve arranged for a friend’s high school-aged daughter to help out for a few afternoons each week.

Things looked rather grim yestday morning, and while we’ve still a rocky stretch ahead, we’re going to pull through in fine fashion. Thanks for your interest and support.