In which Trep goes to hospital. A lot.

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I’m still not sure about writing this, but if I don’t do it today, I won’t do it at all. Happy ending, BTW, just in case you find the start discouraging.

7 Nov, 2019 – middle of the day: pissed blood. Huh? Like, uh – what are you supposed to do? Rang the GP to ask for an appointment. “We don’t have any”. But I just pissed blood. “Be here at 2.30 – bring a bottle”. The doctor told me I had blood in my urine. You don’t say. Sent me to deliver a bottle to the hospital path lab.

11 Nov – away with friends in Canterbury. Got a call from the hospital. Be here Thursday.

14 Nov – AM: ultrasound: “You have a bladder cancer. But just a small one”; PM: camera up the cock. I acted like an utter arse – I was already terrified, and did not cope well with the humiliating and excruciating experience. I couldn’t even manage to get my apology right after it was over. But hey, now I have carte blanche to piss as much blood as I like for a couple of days. Only kidding.

3 Dec – pre-admission procedure. With a fierce nurse who told me that she had studied homeopathy. Surgery (trans urethral) set for 11 Dec.

5 Dec – surgery cancelled, rescheduled for 13 Dec. That’ll be Friday the 13th.

12 Dec – Mrs Trep starts sniffling and sneezing. Just don’t give me a cold, please. I packed cough and cold sweets.

13 Dec – AM: it’s a long, long wait. “You’ll wake up with a catheter in place.” Shit. Put on the gown. Wheeled to theatre. Felt oddly calm chatting and then…. woke up in Recovery. Never made it out of Recovery, actually – no beds free on the ward.

14 Dec – early hours, the guy in the next bed – 70-ish, overspill from ITU – spent the entire night shouting “Help me, Mother!” and variants therof. At 5.15 they gave him something that whacked him out, and I went to sleep. At 6.00 they woke me for breakfast. Sigh. PM: Catheter out noon-ish; you have to do two big pisses before they let you go. They made me do four. Bored shitless, I remembered the sweets!

I broke a tooth. Released at 4PM. Carte blanche to piss blood for the best part of a week.

19 Dec – CT scan to check for “involvement” of ureters and kidneys. “Phone for results in about a week.” Boxing day? “Ah. Okay, a little longer.”

2 Jan – called about the results. “Your case is being discussed today. We’ll call you tomorrow.”

3 Jan – appointment with the consultant fixed for 7 Jan.

7 Jan – Low grade cancer, superficial (ie on, rather than in, the bladder wall), all clear, no need for chemo. Two years of follow up testing. Camera up the cock? “Yep.” At least I get a second chance to apologise.

After all that – what? Well, I knew I was good at compartmentalising, but it turns out I’m brilliant. Too good. There where moments I had to tell myself, FFS Trep, THIS IS SERIOUS. Kind of a lost two months (to the day!); time spent not thinking about things. But everything seems to have happened amazingly fast. The NHS is a wonderful thing, and everybody should have one. Happy New Year.

No, really – Happy New Year.

This isn’t really an AMA (not enough substance to it, I think), but if you do have any questions feel free to ask.

j

2

I am sorry this happened to you, but happy about the hopeful outcome.

Isn’t there any way for them to numb your bits so that the catheterization isn’t so painful?

3

They do, with lidocaine. I suppose it must work to some extent. Maybe part of the problem is that if you think it’s going to hurt (and believe me, you do think that!) then it will. It was all very odd - I refused to look (obviously) and covered my eyes. As the process started - and hurt - I whimpered a bit, and the doctor said something like: “We haven’t even got to the painful bit yet - that’s when the camera enters the bladder.”

I don’t know how far along we were when he said that, but that seems like a very strange thing to say.

The whole process was, however, mercifully brief.

j

4

All’s well that ends well. Glad to hear it and hope it all goes well in the future.

5

Glad you’re okay!

The one time I had serious surgery (gall bladder) nobody bothered to mention to me that I was going to be catheterized while I was under anesthetic. My experience with surgery was being told to count backwards from 100, and going, “100, 99, 98… why does my dick hurt all of a sudden? And where did all the doctors go?”

6

Gawd, I sympathize. I’ve had 'scopes up my hoohoo, and even though it’s a shorter trip for girls, it’s torture. After the first time, I crawled off the exam table, went home, and cried.

Trep, haul out the confetti, the streamers, and the freakin’ champagne! You got an early warning sign, and you responded immediately! Your prize is a “superficial” tumor, and the surgery fixed that! I’m dancing for you!

Drink lots and lots and lots of water.

And congrats!
~VOW

7

Congratulations on discovering it and dealing with it right away, Trep. Sorry about the camera business, I know that hurts but good news is that you’re still around to complain about it.

8

I’m glad the news is good. The follow-ups will suck, but you know what to expect now and having follow-ups is a good problem to have.

9

No questions, just wanted to congratulate you on a good outcome.

Please, please, please follow up with your annual inspections, cameras up sensitive bits and all, and reports anything suspicious to your doc immediately. Life is precious and worth a little discomfort to protect it.

I lost my spouse to bladder cancer - so glad you escaped that. Here’s wishing you good fortune and good health for decades to come.

10

Ouch. So glad you’ll be ok.

Lucky you to have NHS.

11

Holy-moley!
Nice compartmentalizing. Loved it. It gave a really great :eek: picture of your ordeal.
I’m so happy you got a good report.
We need a side-club here on the Dope, for kidney/pee-pee problem sufferers. (The ‘Pissers’ maybe?)
I hope you stay cancer free and well from this day foward.
You’ve been very supportive of my problems and I really appreciate your posts. Thx, friend.

12

Glad everything turned out ok for you. Many of us have been through similar ordeals, glad you came out of it intact.

13

Congrats on the good outcome. May it continue to be such for many years.

I had a problem 2 years ago that started the same as yours (peeing blood) and it turned out to be a tiny bit of cancer in my ureter. I did not find catheritization (either this time or in any of the several previous times this has been necessary) to be even slightly uncomfortable, let alone painful; perhaps it’s different for persons of the male persuasion. What was painful was the stent that had to stay in said ureter for several days. I’ve also had followups every 6 months since, alternating between CT scan and the scope, and so far there’s no recurrence.

My recollection is that the time between the first symptom and the actual removal procedure was a bit quicker than you reported. I already had a urologist because of previous problems, and I live in an area with lots of good medical facilities. One cool thing was that my doctor let me look at the CT scan itself and he pointed out where the little tumor showed up.

I always find it strangely amusing when men talk about how “humiliating” it is to have exams or procedures in any of the private parts. I guess women just get used to it, most of us needing private parts exams at regular intervals for a major portion of our lives. The medical personnel are certainly very matter-of-fact about it, and it’s really nothing to be embarrassed about. They all have seen the same basic anatomy as yours many, many times.

14

I really really hate catheters. But I’ve heard it’s worse for a male.

15

mrAru when he was 12 had his appendix explode and turn into a light case of peritonitis. He ended up in hospital on the ward his mom was working … so here is a young guy with his mom being his nurse, which included catheter care. Oops :o

I have issues with catheters being put in while awake … when I was born, something was wonky with my urethra and my bladder didn’t empty properly, leading to frequent mild UTIs. SO they tried using sounds to stretch it out - leading to an entire summer of treatments that left a poor little 5 year old terrified of peeing. The stretched areas being effectively torn tissue, the urine passing it was agonizing. I remember going into hospital [Highland Childrens Hospital in Rochester NY] for some sort of imaging [I remember being taken in on a gurney and moved to a bed, and then waking up some time later. I had some sort of surgical intervention, and never had peeing issues ever since - though I did end up with a huge UTI while pregnant with both attempts that left me with kidney damage and an odd liking for the radiological stuff for IVPs - the warm flush is like a triple shot of vodka =) But I still panic and flash to being 5 and in agony while trying to not pee as long as possible …

16

Well done on following up immediately. So many people decide to ignore symptoms, hoping that they’ll go away.

Bravo!

<applause>

17

Also, exceptionally well written - you are a funny man!

18

First, thanks to everyone for their good wishes. It’s been like that in the “real world” too – rather humbling. Quite a few people say, well done for acting decisively and immediately, but it really wasn’t like that. What I thought? Is that blood? Can’t be. Surely not. Maybe not. Probably not. Let’s just wait and see what happens. Maybe it won’t happen again.

In the end I more or less shamed myself into ringing the surgery.

VOW – I’m not really a champagne person; but I did have the odd whisky.

Broomstick – I didn’t know about your loss. It’s so saddening and frightening. If I have anything to say in this thread, its this: take it seriously. It really matters. (There’s a colon cancer screening thread that I must step over to and endorse.)

I’m sure you’re right, MLS, but let me expand: Just when you’re shaking with fear about what is going to happen (and yes, I was literally shaking) a nurse says to you, “Can you take your trousers down to your ankles?” What?? Like I’m Colonel Gammon who’s been caught in the pantry with a chambermaid in some Whitehall farce? How about I just take them off? And then I got into an argument because I insisted on covering my eyes. (I’m a bad patient. I really owe them that apology). Humiliating, but not just because of what you think.

Beck – how about Pissing Pals? The Catheter Kids? The Kidney Klub? (Though strictly speaking, I’m one of the Bladder Boys. Can I be an honorary member?)

Having been banned for 3 weeks*, and after checking with the doc yesterday, I finally got out on the bike for a proper ride today. Thirty flat and gentle miles with no ill effects - it’s starting to feel like a return to normality.

j

    • Hell, that fierce nurse banned me from walking up hills (?!) for two weeks.