I got a tip from my boss(!) that a position is opening up in one of the departments we work very closely with. If hired, the guy who would be my new boss is one of my favorite people in the organization.
I’m having a lunch today with he and someone else in his department today. It’s just an informal meeting for me to learn more about the job and them to learn what I bring to the table.
Since we’re going to a restaurant of their choosing, is it generally expected that I’m paying? I don’t mind, but I don’t know if there’s some kind of ethics or conflict of interest issue there. Or is it a case that offering to pay would be nice, but is unnecessary?
They’re going to pay using the company’s credit card. It might be a nice gesture to reach for the check, but they surely will end up taking it, seeing as how it’s a business expense.
Offering to pay might be considered nice by some but I think it is just odd. It is a business lunch that they invited you to. There is no way you should pay for any of it. You won’t need to because they know that.
If you are being interviewed, and you’ve been invited to lunch, you are the guest. There is no need for you to even make a token offer to pay. It will certainly be expensed back to the company. Just make sure you say “Thank you” and follow up with an email.
(A business lunch is different than a social meal. When people mutually agree to meet for a meal socially, there are all kinds of twists and turns to figure out who pays.)
Also, this might sound even odder, but don’t immediately salt your food, taste it and salt accordingly. This is probably very subtle but a Human resources guy mentioned that a couple bosses made a point to see if someone has salted food before eating…apparently it’s an indication of hasty decision making or a tendency to prejudge. <flame on>
but anyway, they’ll probably pick up some insight into you just by watching you eat.
First, I agree with everyone that there is no way you, as the interviewee, should be expected to pay for lunch.
Second, I know for a fact there are people out there who allow something like whether you taste your food before you salt it to be a determining factor for hiring. It’s ridiculous, but it’s true. So, just try and be mindful of your etiquette.
I think you asked just because you are nervous in general. I’d recommend listening to Angry Anderson’s Bound for Glory five times while contemplating how awesome you are then go to lunch and wow them with your confidence and clear ability.
Agree with most of the advice here. Senior person pays and you are a guest anyway.
My tip? relax (or at least give the appearance of relaxation and comfort in a social setting) have three or four beers before the lunch itself just to loosen up. And consider taking your tie off and tying it round your head bandana-style, that always signals to a prospective boss that you can have fun while still maintaining a certain business ethic.
The other cue is that they picked the restaurant already. Generally speaking, if you expect everyone to pitch in for the check then you let everyone vote on Chili’s or Chotchkie’s for lunch.
Be sure to let them order first and then follow their lead.
If the new boss orders an alcoholic beverage, feel free to do so also. If he orders iced tea or soda or what not, also follow suit. If he sticks with water, etc…
This also lets him set the pricepoint for the meal. If the people who are paying order something in an $18 range, I’m sure not gonna order the $30 steak. But if they order something more expensive, don’t be shy about matching (“That steak he ordered sounded great, I think I’d like the same”. This also compliments his ordering skills, and strokes the ego a bit.
For a business lunch, even if the most senior person orders a beer or a wine, I would not. It’s fine to drink at lunch while you’re on vacation, but not if you are working. In fact, I’d think it odd if they ordered an alcoholic drink. It would be fine at dinner, however, since you’re not expecting to go back to work afterwards.
I think it really depends on the culture of where you work. I have had drinks at business lunches before.
Right now, I work for a small software company and drinking at company meals is expected, even at lunch. Not that we expect people to (we have one person who does not drink at all, ever), but rather the expectation is that ordering a beer or a cocktail is not a big deal. We even do offsite meetings from time to time, where we will be having a very business-oriented discussion at a (quiet) bar, enjoying a couple drinks while we do so. We went out a few weeks ago to play minigolf on a warm Friday afternoon, and someone picked up a case of beer. Here, it’s more or less expected that alcohol will be an option at offsite events of any kind.
Now, I’ve definitely worked for places where these things would be unthinkable, and someone ordering alcohol at a company event or being under the influence (even slightly) on company grounds was actually against company policy. Even then, there are exceptions. On one occasion at that company, a VIP client took us out for dinner (low level people on their project, it was a thank-you sort of deal, she was an executive) and did start ordering drinks, which made a lot of people nervous. She got a bit wounded when everyone just ordered one drink and politely sipped, because she clearly wanted to drink more. After pretending to let myself be arm-twisted, I just started ordering drinks whenever she did. A few other people started following suit as well. This ended up being to the tune of 6 or so drinks per person – but the client was happy, our management was happy that she was happy, and I had a ride back to the office, so I just stayed late to “catch up on some work I missed” (sobered up).
Anyway, my point is, read the situation. Appropriateness varies a great deal.
Depends on the company and the industry, I suppose. My office (a software firm) has two cases of beer in the office fridge right now.
A big part of an interview is showing the interviewer whether or not you’ll fit in with the culture of their group. I would never be the first to order a drink, but I would certainly be the third.
